ah, relief

i was suffering all day for lack of lip balm. it was a rough time, 5 hours of withdrawal. it will take months for my lips to learn to rehydrate themselves again, for the year(s) of lip balm addiction theyve gone through.

amy mentioned this monday but i heard today

so howard stern has been cancelled in many a swing state by the parent owner of the stations he's on-- clear channel-- because he made some critical comments about the administration and how bush needs to be removed from office. happens that the ceo of clear channel, lowry mays, is friends of bush sr and bush jr. (http://archive.salon.com/news/feature/2004/03/04/stern/index_np.html) (you need a pass or subscription to read)

clear channel owns everything from radio stations (a lot of them) to concert arenas to promotion companies (bringing the very bands that america loves to your hometown) to billboards. and this besides the deregulation/ monopoly stuff..scary.

last november people showed up in miami for the ftaa gatherings because they believe food should be gmo-free, wage rates should be living wages, health care should not be a money game, and water should not be sold for profit.
they didn't want the race to the bottom that will inevitably come with the ftaa trade agreement.

what they found was thousands of police, (and to me, this is the kicker:) paid for by $8.5 million from the $87 billion Congress approved for spending in Iraq. every single person i know who went to miami came back traumatized by what they saw, a total show of force on the part of the government and the fortune 500 companies supporting the ftaa trade agreement. no one was safe: union folks, senior citizens, students, black bloc kids, journalists. if you were there => you were considered a terrorist.

what is really at stake here? money money money

NOW with Bill Moyers featured what took place in Miami in this segment: Criminalizing Dissent? (http://www.pbs.org/now/thisweek/index_022704.html#)

(the footage of the police shooting at the journalists and media is pretty terrible..)

subtitled: balancing the act between technology and life

nice dream

the other night i had a dream about an ipod. this was right after i was looking at nick's journal before i fell asleep. and then last night ko had a dream about 3 ipods. i don't think his dream was related to nick's post, but it's funny how it reached my subconscious. haha, this is why i need to quit this for a little while..

how much are you like what you say (write)

i am working on a feedback piece, i havent forgotten. what a perfectionist.

i like to ponder how our respective personalities come through in this forum, and how the things we say or don't say say a whole lot about us.

does anyone relate to any of this?

have you ever had a dream somehow entangled with something on this site? i bet paul dreams about the site that one hour of the night that he sleeps ;) i find myself a little bit addicted (ok, maybe it's more like a lot) to this site; are you addicted? do you look more than you write? feel free to make me feel loved and email.

sometimes things don't turn out the way you wish, but its got to happen that way nonetheless.

btw, we all loved robin's video. i hope you feel ok about it in the end. and buffalo does have a shitty public transport system.

one promise from me if everyone can keep a promise of their own. lets not think about yesterday, or tomorrow.
yesterday is too far gone and tomorrow is too far ahead to plan. just be right here right now (no, im not quoting that jesus jones song). in the present. live this moment, none of the past or future is relevant. deal?

when you need to procrastinate a little bit..

everyone needs a break every now and then. or maybe i just have no attention span whatsoever.

just don't get too addicted..(http://www.80smusiclyrics.com/games/#null)

some nocturnal buddies.

sleeping at night is overrated

Massive National Antiwar Demonstration

When -- Saturday, March 20
Where -- New York City

March 20th is a Global day of Action against war and
occupation on the first anniversary of the war on
Iraq. The Peace Center is sending buses to the huge
national demonstration in NYC.

Tickets are $40/$25 student and low income. If you
can't go, please consider sponsoring a student
demonstrator. For more info, to reserve seats or to
donate, please call us at 894-2013 or email
colin@wnypeace.org colin at the peace center

you can read more about it on the United for Peace and Justice site ( )

If you can't go to NYC . . .

What -- "Freedom from Fear" antiwar rally/march
When -- Saturday, March 20th, 2 PM
Where -- Lafayette Square, Downtown Buffalo

The Bush administration has manipulated post-9/11
fears to justify wars abroad and abuses at home. On
March 20th, Western New Yorkers will join together to
reject the politics of fear and say:
No more war and occupation
No more anti-Arab discrimination
No more anti-immigrant policies
No more violent policing in our community

For more info, or to get involved, call 894-2013 or
email colin@wnypeace.orgcolin at the peace center

if youre lost you can look and you will find me

i am pondering running off to anchorage alaska to be there for someone important, even if it's just for a day or two. some things you shouldn't miss.

what a curious sight we have found here tonight

thomas just streaked through the entire house, setting a new precedent for people who are moving out. its so sad. we re going to have one more family night with him of 40s and degrassi jr high. we ll miss you kortkamp! and too bad for future visitors who wont be able to germanize it up with you. bodaydajib all the way!

i burn for you, and drown in you so wait, turn around, and stay

its all set, with a second coat of paint and a little cleaning i can move upstairs. i am so excited, its my very favorite room in the entire house. i know its not really that exciting and prolly is real boring for you to read about it, but if any of you have seen, you might remember how cute it is. the verdict is still up in the air about whether or not i am taking anyone upstairs with me. one thing is sure, i am shedding a lot of baggage before movin on up. no more cluttermania. no more feeling weighted sinking and washed away.

i'm getting too many emails on this one to ignore it.. [note: the articles are listed in backwards chronological order] just to give some context, it seems what started as a way to even out the injustices of who is serving in the war, has led to a frightening plan on the part of the pentagon to fill draft board seats..this first article is from someone affiliated with project censored, which focuses on the news that the larger media outlets *somehow* miss..

US Preparing for Military Draft in Spring 2005
by Adam Stutz • Wednesday January 28, 2004 at 09:50 AM (http://www.vancouver.indymedia.org/news/2004/01/105146.php)

Dear Friends and Family,

I urge you to read the article below on the current agenda of the federal government to reinstate the draft in order to staff up for a protracted war on "terrorism."

Pending legislation in the House and Senate (twin bills S 89 and HR 163) would time the program so the draft could begin at early as Spring 2005 -- conveniently just after the 2004 presidential election! But the administration is quietly trying to get these bills passed NOW, so our action is needed immediately. Details and links follow.

If voters who currently support U.S. aggression abroad were confronted with the possibility that their own children or grandchildren might not have a say about
whether to fight, many of these same voters might have a change of mind. (Not that it should make a difference, but this plan would among other things eliminate higher education as a shelter and would not exclude women -- and Canada is no longer an option.)

Please send this on to all the parents and teachers you know, and all the aunts and uncles, grandparents, godparents.... And let your children know -- it's their future, and they can be a powerful voice for change! Please also write to your representatives to ask them why they aren't telling their constituents about these bills -- and write to newspapers and other media outlets to ask them why they're not covering this important story.

The Draft*

$28 million has been added to the 2004 Selective Service System (SSS) budget to prepare for a military draft that could start as early as June 15, 2005. SSS must report to
Bush on March 31, 2005 that the system, which has lain dormant for decades, is ready for activation. Please see website: to
view the SSS Annual Performance Plan - Fiscal Year 2004.

The Pentagon has quietly begun a public campaign to fill all 10,350 draft board positions and 11,070 appeals board slots nationwide.. Though this is an unpopular election year topic, military experts and influential members of Congress are suggesting that if Rumsfeld's prediction of a "long, hard slog" in Iraq and Afghanistan [and a permanent state of war on "terrorism"] proves accurate, the U.S. may have no choice but to draft.

Congress brought twin bills, S. 89 and H.R. 163 forward this year, entitled the Universal National Service Act of 2003, "To provide for the common defense by requiring that all young persons [age 18--26] in the United States, including women, perform a period of military service or a period of civilian service in furtherance of the national defense and homeland security, and for other purposes." These active bills currently sit in the Committee on Armed Services.

Dodging the draft will be more difficult than those from the Vietnam era remember. College and Canada will not be options. In December 2001, Canada and the US signed a "Smart Border Declaration," which could be used to keep would-be draft dodgers in. Signed by Canada's Minister of Foreign Affairs, John Manley, and US Homeland Security Director, Gov. Tom Ridge, the declaration involves a 30-point plan which implements, among other things, a "pre-clearance agreement" of people entering and departing each country. Reforms aimed at making the draft more equitable
a
lo

ng gender and class lines also eliminates higher education as a shelter. Underclassmen would only be able to postpone service until the end of their current semester. Seniors would have until the end of the academic year.

• This article by Adam Stutz is from the "What's Hot Off the Press" column of the newsletter of Project Censored, a media research group at Sonoma State University that tracks the news published in independent journals and newsletters. From these, Project Censored compiles an annual list (more than 20 years running) of 25 news stories of social significance that have been overlooked, under-reported, or self-censored by the country's major national news media. The mission of Project Censored is "to educate people about the role of independent journalism in a democratic society and to tell The News That Didn't Make the News and why."

"What's Hot Off the Press" includes student synopses of articles currently being investigated for inclusion in the next Project Censored report. For more info and/or to receive Project Censored's newsletter, go to or email [censored]@sonoma.edu

Don't believe it yet? Go to and search for "S 89", then later
search for "HR 163" where it says "By Number" and you'll find the articles. I would link you to the articles directly but that doesn't work for some reason.

"Oiling up the Draft Machine?" (http://www.informationclearinghouse.info/article5146.htm)

updated:

brian has brought it to my attn that these bills have been sponsored by legislators not aligned with the white house, to highlight the fact that not everyones sons and daughters are fighting. the salon articles i found when i typed "millitary draft" yielded this article, from when the bill was first being introduced:

Bring back the draft? (http://archive.salon.com/news/feature/2003/01/07/draft/) Rep. Charles Rangel says yes -- the poor, black and brown shouldn't be the only Americans fighting and dying in Iraq.

what to think?

but if its true that the pentagon is planning on filling draft board vacancies, (refer to the oiling the draft machine article), what then? would that level the playing field any? this still doesn't get at deeper issues of wars, lies, media deception and justifying invasions. and would the public outcry over an unjust war stop any of this motion of talking about drafts? military spending is up, the global trade machine is moving forward (and many a link has been made between war and the proliferation of trade), and if the pentagon's report on climate change (see journal 103) is accurate, we are at the beginning of more conflict. and they're not just suggesting that climate change is happening and that we should think about it, theyre thinking strategically about building power to fight those climate-related wars, when they come...

youre out of touch im out of time but im out of my head when youre not around

i have exactly 666 emails in my mailbox(es). funny that.

theres absolutely nothing meaningful to say. if i was charming and conniving id sucker you into helping me drywall and paint to start the 'move emily upstairs' effort this week.

now, for a word in the second person

we were observing how rare it is that people use the term second person, its always referred to when the first or the third person is used. except for choose your own adventure, remember those?

you remember and take a stroll down memory lane (go to page 56)

you don't remember and try to look it up online to figure out what the hell she's saying (go to page 128)

you don't remember, and don't remember that you don't remember (go to page 42)

you sigh about how stupid and meaningless it all is, and decide to go back to the oscars (go downstairs)

so email me with yr answer to this:

what is your life like when youre in love?