12/22/04 01:57 - ID#21155
He's here
Here's Dhruv (named after the north star)
And here's aunty and nephew
Permalink: He_s_here.html
Words: 85
Location: Buffalo, NY
12/06/04 03:01 - ID#21154
it beckons, oh yes it does
Permalink: it_beckons_oh_yes_it_does.html
Words: 56
Location: Buffalo, NY
12/05/04 03:49 - ID#21153
True story, I promise
CANADA BUSY SENDING BACK BUSH-DODGERS
Joe Blundo,
THE COLUMBUS DISPATCH
The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The re-election of President Bush is prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray and agree with Bill O'Reilly. Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?" In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk." Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals Near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them Across the border and leave them to fend for themselves. "A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though." When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often Wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR. In the days since the election, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said. Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?" In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said. "We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The president is determined to reach out."
Permalink: True_story_I_promise.html
Words: 513
Location: Buffalo, NY
09/20/04 01:35 - ID#21152
the cup and other vagaries
Permalink: the_cup_and_other_vagaries.html
Words: 13
Location: Buffalo, NY
09/17/04 05:53 - ID#21151
Party-sharty
Permalink: Party_sharty.html
Words: 35
Location: Buffalo, NY
08/31/04 01:11 - ID#21150
dance dance
Permalink: dance_dance.html
Words: 19
Location: Buffalo, NY
08/30/04 09:00 - ID#21149
School for the cool
So today was the first day of school. It was cool. Now I cannot write too. Anyways I shall persist. I realized for the first time in my life that I cannot bullshit as well as I thought I could. When asked in class what my research interest was I proceded to splutter and barely managed to string and incoherent thread of slightly disguised crap about my interest in Domestic violence amongst immigrant women of South asian origin. I am deeply interested in the subject but for the life of me could not think straight and coalesce many many tiny threads of thought into one. I hate it. Does it happen to other people too? Please write and make me feel better. I discovered when I got my first Masters degree that bullshitting was integral to academia. I soon grew to love it and got quite good with it. But lately my pretentiousness has bit me in my more than ample arse and I have taken to looking at people who continue to do so with great contempt derison and loathing, note here my use of words, Ah... the familiar traces of pretence.
And I also realized that there is familiar nagging feeling that I think crept up on me one day when I was asleep. I feel completely, thoroughly displaced. I love Buffalo but I love the dirt and grime and familiarity of old familiar lanes that take you to hot sambhar and rice. Going back to school was a culture shock. I realize that I sing the same words as everyone but I hear a different song in my head.
In other thoughts, how many of you e-peeps would like a Bhangra dance party and Indian food fiesta? Please post votes. I can accomodate about 15 people at my place and I am itching to shake da ass
Permalink: School_for_the_cool.html
Words: 338
Location: Buffalo, NY
08/30/04 04:02 - ID#21148
Funny-no?
I have been asked these questions many times people...
Q. Why do Indian women wear red dots on their foreheads?
A. Well, in ancient times, Indian men used to practice archery skills by target practicing by aiming at their wife's red dot. In fact, that is one of the reasons why they had many wives. You see, once they mastered the art of archery and hit the target...
Q. You're from India? I have read so much about the country. All the wonderful places, the forests, the snake charmers, the elephants. Do you still use elephants for transportation?
A. Absolutely. In fact we used to have our own elephant in our house. But later, we started participating in elephant ride-sharing schemes with our neighbors, to save the air. You see elephants have an "emissions" problem.....
Q. Does India have cars?
A. No. We ride elephants to work. The government is trying to encourage ride-sharing schemes.
Q. Does India have TV?
A. No. We only have cable.
Q. Are all Indians vegetarian?
A. Yes. Even tigers are vegetarian in India.
Q. Are you a Hindi?
A. Yes. I am spoken everyday in Northern India.
Q. Do you speak Hindu?
A. Yes, I also speak Jewish, Islam and Christianity.
Q. Is it true that everyone there is very corrupt?
A. Yes, in fact, I had to bribe my parents so that they would let me go to school.
Q. India is very hot, isn't it?
A. It is so hot there that all the water boils spontaneously. That is why tea is such a popular drink in India.
Q. Are there any business companies in India?
A. No. All Indians live on the Gandhian prinicples of self-sufficiency. We all make our own clothes and grow our own food. That is why you see all these thin skinny Indians; it is is a lot of hard work.
Q. Indians cannot eat beef, huh?
A. Cows provide milk which is a very essential part of Indian diet. So eating cows is forbidden. However in order to decrease the population of the country, the government is trying to encourage everyone to eathuman meat.
Q. India is such a religious place. Do you meditate regularly?
A. Yes, sometimes I meditate for weeks without food and drink. But it is difficult to keep my job, because I have to miss work when I meditate like that. But the bosses there do the same thing. That is why things are so inefficient there.
Q. I saw on TV that people there walk on burning coals. Why do they do that?
A. We don't have shoes. So we burn the bottom of our feet to make it hard so that we can walk. Japanese
Permalink: Funny_no_.html
Words: 456
Location: Buffalo, NY
08/30/04 04:01 - ID#21147
Funny-no?
I have been asked these questions many times people...
Q. Why do Indian women wear red dots on their foreheads?
A. Well, in ancient times, Indian men used to practice archery skills by target practicing by aiming at their wife's red dot. In fact, that is one of the reasons why they had many wives. You see, once they mastered the art of archery and hit the target...
Q. You're from India? I have read so much about the country. All the wonderful places, the forests, the snake charmers, the elephants. Do you still use elephants for transportation?
A. Absolutely. In fact we used to have our own elephant in our house. But later, we started participating in elephant ride-sharing schemes with our neighbors, to save the air. You see elephants have an "emissions" problem.....
Q. Does India have cars?
A. No. We ride elephants to work. The government is trying to encourage ride-sharing schemes.
Q. Does India have TV?
A. No. We only have cable.
Q. Are all Indians vegetarian?
A. Yes. Even tigers are vegetarian in India.
Q. Are you a Hindi?
A. Yes. I am spoken everyday in Northern India.
Q. Do you speak Hindu?
A. Yes, I also speak Jewish, Islam and Christianity.
Q. Is it true that everyone there is very corrupt?
A. Yes, in fact, I had to bribe my parents so that they would let me go to school.
Q. India is very hot, isn't it?
A. It is so hot there that all the water boils spontaneously. That is why tea is such a popular drink in India.
Q. Are there any business companies in India?
A. No. All Indians live on the Gandhian prinicples of self-sufficiency. We all make our own clothes and grow our own food. That is why you see all these thin skinny Indians; it is is a lot of hard work.
Q. Indians cannot eat beef, huh?
A. Cows provide milk which is a very essential part of Indian diet. So eating cows is forbidden. However in order to decrease the population of the country, the government is trying to encourage everyone to eathuman meat.
Q. India is such a religious place. Do you meditate regularly?
A. Yes, sometimes I meditate for weeks without food and drink. But it is difficult to keep my job, because I have to miss work when I meditate like that. But the bosses there do the same thing. That is why things are so inefficient there.
Q. I saw on TV that people there walk on burning coals. Why do they do that?
A. We don't have shoes. So we burn the bottom of our feet to make it hard so that we can walk. Japanese
Permalink: Funny_no_.html
Words: 456
Location: Buffalo, NY
08/16/04 01:46 - ID#21146
Olympic ringa-ringa roses, pocket full
Of poses
Hush-a- bush-a
we all fall down...
Caught the opening parade of the Olympics. I remember how big an event it used to be when we were little, a family event. When I was 7 years old, during the 1984 olympics, my father and mother, hardpressed though they were for money, decided to buy a colour TV. We obviously soon became those people who bought a new colour TV. I made a whole lot of new friends that time. My parents would allow us to invite our friends over and we would sit together on the floor, like little attentive soldiers who had to tread carefully otherwise we would be punished. We wouldnt make a noise. Biscuits would be passed around and we would watch the gymnastics and diving events in rapture. Techniques would be learnt and we would try them out in the park nearby. I remember how we were always woken up at 2 or 3 in the morning because that was when the openeing ceremony would begin. And ma would give us milk or baby coffee, which was a glass of warm milk mixed with 2-3 drops of her strong filter coffee. My parents would pack us up in blankets and we would watch the ceremonies begin. Those times were one of the few times I saw my father really excited. He was all that we kids wanted him to be, charming, loving and so funny. And funnily enough now that he is not there anymore, thats how I remember him, charming, loving and so funny.
Permalink: Olympic_ringa_ringa_roses_pocket_full.html
Words: 256
Location: Buffalo, NY
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