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Jenks's Journal

jenks
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07/30/2009 01:23 #49411

NY, NY
So, I'm in NYC for the week. I'm taking a microsurgery course at Columbia. And they are putting me up at a seminary- 47 blocks away. WTF? So I have to commute to this course and take the subway. Huh? I mean really! This is NEW YORK. There must be another place to stay closer than 47 blocks away. That isn't a seminary, too. A seminary is like the last place I should stay- I feel like I should burst into flames when I walk through the door! ;)

But, whatever, it's fine. And the room has a little mini-kitchen. So today I on my way home I bought a box of granola bars to have for breakfast. And I ate a bag of popcorn on my way home. And threw the bag in my trash can.

Which in retrospect, was a stupid idea. But I figured if there's a kitchen, there's meant to be food. But I should have known.

Yesterday, I saw a big roach scurry under the bed. Awesome. But, having lived with cat-sized roaches in New Orleans, I didn't care too much.

But the reason I am awake now is because I was just AWAKENED FROM A DEAD SLEEP by the sound of a MOUSE in my popcorn bag. Awesome.
May have to bring this to someone's attention. Too bad the 'office' is only open from 10-2, and I am gone from 8-5.

Oh well. Otherwise NY is good. Have had the chance to see some friends, and make some others, and on top of it all it's Restaurant Week, so I've been eating way too much.

But, I kind of can't wait to go home on Sat, because I have my date that night. :) He's been super adorably cute. Calling just enough to make me feel important, and not enough to make me feel smothered.
So I want to hurry up and have this date and get to know him better... because I feel like it's not right to be all excited about someone I barely know.

And who knows, maybe if this works out I can cancel my match.com, which seems to be hitting an all time low. I seriously can't believe some of the people on there. Especially when they email me about how much we have in common. I'm like "really? fat bald divorced high school dropout guy with no job in a football jersey? You think we have a lot in common?" But then the other day I actually, for the first time in months, saw someone that might be interesting... so I sent him a message. No reply. After a week, I wrote back "wow, I don't even get a hello? Well, good luck to you." To which he sent back an apology... Said he was sorry to be rude but he thinks it's best not to answer. That while he respects doctors, "Being a doctor is a massive time commitment and for that reason I didn't feel it was a good fit. I am sure many would be estatic [sic] to be involved with someone that would so greatly assist on the financial side of life in addition to the general relationship. For me, time is more important."

Dumbass. The 'financial side' comment is super obnoxious, if you ask me. I also noticed that the only place I didn't match his criteria was "body type". I have listed myself as "average"- he only wants "slender" or "athletic and toned." Again, oh really dude? You're not that hot. You posted 12 pictures that prove that fact. I wrote b/c he was witty and seemed to like the same things as me. Guess not. He also wrote "reguardless" and "defensce". We're clearly not meant to be.

So, I couldn't let it go and sent him back a message that said that I agree- I don't respond to people I'm not interested in. But that usually those people aren't cute doctors. But that if he is willing to write off a whole profession without knowing more [my hours as a hand surgeon will not be a problem]- then maybe we're not a good match. Then for good measure I tacked on "and I have to ask- are you really that hot that merely "average" girls need not apply?"

Somehow i'm not expecting a response to that one.

And just now I got "Your smile light up my screen.. If think.. We can be friends let me know.. I am DOMINIC. If want please sent me mail.. Thanks." DOMINIC, you are 46 but don't seem to have mastered fundamental reading/writing, so I think I'll pass.

God I'm a bitch. Ugh.

Last comment-
Jim/James- you guys ok? :(

later peeps. Now I will try to fall back asleep and hope the mouse doesn't wake me up going through the garbage I moved out to the hallway.
jenks - 08/01/09 09:43
well, no, that's not what I said. I said that I didn't think he was hot enough to be disqualifying 'average' women. But I did not disqualify him based on that. I still thought he was cute (perhaps, average?), and, I realize there is more to a person than their looks. I said he's not all that hot, BUT I thought he was smart and witty and interesting, and thus I sent him a message.
carolinian - 07/31/09 10:44
If I am reading your post right, you are disqualifying a guy partly due to his appearance being below a certain standard while simultaneously lamenting unfair and unrealistic standards of appearance that you yourself don't meet.
metalpeter - 07/30/09 19:51
In Terms of the New York thing. Since you don't like to travel the 47 blocks and you mentioned you don't like the place and you met up with some friends why not just tell them that your place is gross and ask if they have a couch? You aren't paying for the place so what if you don't stay there. Now if you are a player you could find someone to have fun with who is close to the school and like walk two blocks or something?

In terms of the dating thing. The things that you mentioned have nothing to do with if you have any thing in common. Having things in common are interests you both have. It sounds like it wouldn't have worked out anyways so.....
chico - 07/30/09 16:23
I love you. Please come back to me. But quit your job first, so we can eliminate the very last thing we don't have in common.

Signed,

Fat Bald Divorced High School Dropout Guy with No Job in a Football Jersey
vincent - 07/30/09 12:52
Yea, so you're staying in a seminary? All I can think about is the repulsion that I had as a high school kind in going to a "convent" in Lewiston. When I was finishing up my classes for confirmation we had to go on a retreat to this big nunnery/private school to meet with these evangelical Catholics. Well we were there all day and we had to eat their food in this cafeteria. I don't know what they served but seeing these 80 year old Catholic nuns and the slop they ate really gave me the the Hebe jeebees. This was totally reinforced by the fact that when I went to Poland years later we ate at another convent over there on some tour and again these 80 year old nuns served up some porridge soup that was disgusting. So I can feel your odd vibe just through my own experience

As for dating, I knew that you were just screwed here in Buffalo, but it does make me happy to see that we don't have a monopoly of 40 year old, fat bald guys living in their Mom's basement trying to hit the love lotto.

I'm glad that someone in the early 30's (e:strip) single demographic has a shot to put the losing streak to an end. Although I am considering going back on match, I may just not bother given what you seem to be reporting. As for the “high standards” in regards to body type, some people would rather build a relationship of our physical chemistry than convince themselves of physical attraction after getting to know someone.
jim - 07/30/09 09:33
Jenks, thanks, surviving :)
jason - 07/30/09 09:11
Alex, I don't understand the impulse to question someone, or even worse, shit on someone for not responding. Do you respond to every single person you're not interested in? The answer should be yes.

Besides, there is something you need to appreciate about being a guy. I walk down the street and if I'm not a girl's type, many of them will call me a creep. A CREEP!!! For what?! For saying hello? For giving a smile? The difference between being a creep and a catch is razor thin, the inexplicable reaction to panties getting wet.

The reason I don't bother is because a hell of a lot of them are terribly cruel for no good reason. I'd rather beat off than deal with that. I'm happy with that arrangement. Men simply are not as judgmental or cruel. Every little god damn thing is a cause for concern. What's so hard about taking it easy on people? Why not just let it go?

Yeah, I guess I feel passionate about it and got a little ranty. I mean, all the poor bastard did was just not respond. It's okay. For that matter, everything that doesn't work out for us is okay. I've had some terrible disappointments, heartaches, and here I am. They haven't ran me off the tracks yet. Seriously, have fun on your date. Enjoy it! Be happy! The rest of this stuff is noise.
tinypliny - 07/30/09 05:17
What was that about Jim and James??


PS: Your journals are so much fun. Haha

07/26/2009 15:15 #49383

cupcake weekend
I feel like a giddy little kid.

So this weekend a girlfriend of mine came into town, and I ventured out 'on the town' for the first time. We had a great time. On saturday night, we went out for dinner and then were getting some drinks... Now, she works with a woman in Rochester who was like "omg you need to meet my son! He lives in CT!" and gave him her number. Well, since she was in CT, she called him. So he rounded up a buddy, and they drove an hour from New Haven to Hartford, to come hang out with these two girls they'd never even met. heh. But it was a lot of fun. They were, as she says, cupcakes. 'sweet and warm and impressionable, with a short half life.'

But even better was friday.
We went out, and then this friend of mine met us.... I knew him when I lived in DC, but hadn't seen or talked to him in >10 years. But then one day he popped up as a 'friend suggestion' on facebook, and lo and behold- he lives in hartford.
So, he met us out.
And- he's still totally cute.
And single.
And fun.
So we had a great night.
And he texted me the next say "that was really fun! Let's go out this week. Let me know what day is good for you."

And I'm so dumb that at first I didn't even realize- I think I was just asked out!

I told him I'd be in NY this week, but am coming back Sat. Then my friend took my phone and texted him "would a boy like you be interested in seeing a girl like me on, say, next saturday?" (which is way more boldly flirtatious than I could ever be) and he responded "a boy like me would DEFINITELY be interested in spending next saturday with you."

Aww.

Way too early to make anything of it.

But, exciting nonetheless. I can barely even remember the last time I went on a date.


mrmike - 07/26/09 21:28
I know that last feeling all too well

07/23/2009 16:37 #49364

a few random thoughts
So I was just driving home from work, through a seedy part of town, and saw some guy forcefully throw his empty Sprite bottle on the ground. Even worse, there was a big garbage can about 20 feet away.

It pissed me off way more than I expected. I really wanted to roll down my window and yell at him to pick up his fucking garbage, but he looked like the type of guy who may well pull out a gun and shoot me right there for saying that.

Fucker. I hate that guy.

Next thought:
I like my co-fellow. I liked him when I met him during interviews, and was looking forward to working with him. Was actually hoping he would be single and would be my soulmate. Alas, he is neither. He is dating some country singer with a kid, and he talks a LOT (almost exclusively?) about bodybuilding, and strippers. (apparently he used to be a semi-pro bodybuilder). He's from new jersey and shaves his arms. I think that says it all. ;) No but really, he's a decent guy and we get along fine and I think working together all year will be good- but we're not soulmates.
But so my dilemma is-
he has AWFUL breath. Like always. Maybe it's because all he eats is "muscle milk"- who knows.
but what do I do about this?
I offer him gum like constantly. To the point that I am running out of gum. But he doesn't seem to have gotten the hint.
Help! Any suggestions?

And final comment-
I'm going to NYC on sunday, and will be there til Sat. Any NY peeps (jess?) going to be around?
jason - 07/24/09 16:31
Posing trunks? I think that speaks for itself. And the shaving thing - you know I have a friend that shaves down his legs and arms and stuff. It's a cosmetic thing. That speaks for itself as well.
jbeatty - 07/24/09 10:14
Anonymously mail him a bottle of Listerine.
jenks - 07/23/09 22:48
hahaha, ok, sorry for the jersey crack. ;)
He was showing me pix from his bodybuilding days today. All oiled up, and in "posing trunks". (he corrected me on that. It is NOT a speedo.)

But yeah, littering is never cool. But especially when there is a trash can 20 feet away, and YOU HAVE TO WALK PAST IT TO GET WHERE YOU ARE GOING.

Grrrrr.
chico - 07/23/09 22:39
hmmm... I moved to B-lo from Jersey, maybe I should start shaving my arms. But it's such a slippery slope... (read as implicit reference to Seinfeld episode in which Jerry shaves his chest).

I hate that blatant littering behavior too. On Staten Island a few years ago my sister and I witnessed these two d-bags throw an entire bag of trash from McDonald's out of the window of their speeding car on the West Shore Expressway. Jerks.
tinypliny - 07/23/09 17:49
hahaha Your post made me laugh out loud.

I don't know - casually hand him a brochure on halitosis remedies?

Yeah, there is no easy way past that.

07/18/2009 22:06 #49328

etc etc
Hello. :)

Looking/reading about italian fest etc is making me jealous. Looks like everyone is having so much fun!

I finally got in touch with the kid I knew back when I lived in DC... And then I also saw the girl I lived with when I was there... It's been 11 years since I saw him. And probably 5 since I've seen her. So she invited me over for dinner last night, and said to bring him along. I was kind of excited 1- to actually leave the house and be social, 2- to catch up with old friends, 3- to spend some time with someone who actually lives here and might be able to give me some hints on where to go, etc and 4- to see this guy again. For all I know he's married with kids now, but, eh, so what. He was really cute ten years ago. ;)
But, at the last second he called and cancelled. Bummer. But said we'll have to hang out this week.

So I went to dinner alone. And we had a nice time, but it was super chill... burgers with her, her husband, and their son. Then we chatted until it was his bedtime, then I left. I thought about going to the bar near my house alone afterwards... but then decided to skip the calories and go to bed.

Today tried to do some errands, only to learn that this city is a GHOST TOWN on weekends. I tried to go to CVS... a major pharmacy, only to learn it's only open til 12 on saturday, and not at all on sunday. WTF?! What the hell kind of place is this?

But tomorrow I'm going to Ikea. woohoo, can't wait. Then maybe I can finally finish my last bits of unpacking.

I finally talked to my girlfriend K, for the first time since I moved, so now I'm not mad at her anymore. AND, she's going to come visit me next weekend. wheee.

Work is good. I printed up a report this AM... it's been 2.5 weeks, and I have done 58 cases already. For comparison- I did 168 during my whole final year of residency. Granted, these cases are, for the most part, much quicker cases, but still. It's good. :)

Oh, and on thursday at work I had a super hottie patient. 33 and a cop- busted his hand catching a 'bad guy'. So I took my time putting his cast back on so we could chat. ;) Too bad it's totally unethical to date a patient. But, at least it was fun for the day. And, I know I'll see him again in 2-3 weeks to take the cast off.

What else. My boards are in like 3 weeks. SHIT. I really need to go into super hermit mode and study non-stop. But, it's not happening. And then I have to go to NYC for the last week of July, to take a course for work. Which normally would be awesome, but it's just about the worst possible timing. Ugh.

And what else... I think Dan is going to marry his new GF. He told me she's moved in with him and they're 'very very serious'. The only catch- she's still married. Oops. Minor detail. I like her fine... she's... nice, sweet. Vanilla. I mean there's nothing BAD about her, but nothing amazing either. So I'm not exactly sure what he sees in her, but... whatever, guess it's none of my business.
But the thing that pisses me off, is that now he won't even talk to me. I mean yes, I'm not stupid, I understand that we can't be super tight. But I finally said to him "you know, she is a better friend to me these days than you are." And he said "well, sometimes it's hard to be your friend when I know you want so so much more."

Ugh, that made my blood boil. It was everything I could do to not say "oh get over yourself." I mean that's the problem?! he's afraid to say hello to me b/c he thinks I'm sitting here pining over him?!

Bleh.

I am so over him.

And finally... a picture my cousin sent of my little cousin... the last time I saw him he was maybe 7 or 8 [they live in Italy]. And that was in.... '92 maybe? In any case- he's not a little kid anymore! hubba hubba. Enjoy the eye candy.



image
metalpeter - 07/19/09 12:08
Your post is interesting not really sure what to say other then In a few weeks the cop won't be a patient anymore and maybe he can bring his hand cuffs. In terms of the Picture that isn't really a banana hammock. It is a speedo and it looks like it might be the wrong size also, not sure they make all kinds of cuts on those. That is how racing swim suits used to look, don't think I have any pictures of my self from those days.
jenks - 07/19/09 08:43
Well, it *IS* Italy... I'm not usually a fan of the speedo, but somehow I don't mind it so much here. Ah, soccer does a body good.
rory - 07/19/09 05:14
Banana hammock - brave choice.
tinypliny - 07/19/09 01:08
So is your cousin a runway model in Milan?

Luka should take note of this. Where *is* he? LOL
theecarey - 07/19/09 00:36
thank you, thank you very much.

I know I had other thoughts, comments, but they dissolved on eye contact with the picture. :)

07/13/2009 21:16 #49282

random hello
I think I am in Thai food withdrawal. haha. I miss having saigon cafe right around the corner- I will have to find my new local faves.

I'm settling in ok... haven't met anyone yet, but then again, I haven't made a single effort either. My boards are a month from today (ACK!), so I feel like I can't really justify doing anything but work/unpack/study for work/study for boards.

Work is going pretty well though. There's so much to learn... but everyone knows that and is super understanding and helpful.

I miss Buffalo though. I miss my friends. I miss knowing where things are... It's been revealing though. People that I thought were my close friends, have disappeared. My one "best friend" doesn't answer the phone, doesn't call me back... She has a new BF... I guess he has replaced me. Which I understand... sorta... except- she and I have been close for like 4 years. She's known him since April. If I ever do manage to talk to her, it's via text, and then it's like 'oh shit gotta go, [BF] is coming." It's almost like he doesn't 'allow' her to talk to me, which is SUPER bullshit and makes me want to kick his ass. She's a super cool girl, and should not be with some dipshit who dictates when she can use her phone.

So, I went home for the weekend. It was nice, except I ate way too much, and did not do any studying. But I did get to see my dad's pix from graduation. 5 years, and we only took like 5 pix. All nearly identical (and not great) of me and my mom... none of my friends/classmates... ah well- guess I should have thought of that at the time.

So here's a random photo dump.

image
my kitchen. Those boxes are all gone now, thank god, but that kind of sucked.

image
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Sunbathing in my [parents'] front yard. I think it was raining in Buffalo at the time. ;)

image

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image

image

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5 very similar pictures of me and my mom at graduation. Didn't get any with Dad. :( They did take formal pictures, but I'm not sure how/if I'll ever get to see them.

and I figured I'd temper the vanity of posting 5 pix of myself all dressed up with 2 terrible pictures of me in my apt, thinking about packing. (not actually doing anything about it, just contemplating.)
The one makes me think maybe there IS such a thing as too tan... I look scary.

image
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jenks - 07/19/09 23:14
They just gave us (girls) each a rose for the pictures. No real significance beyond that.
metalpeter - 07/19/09 12:12
Nice TV, wow that was a lot of boxes, and one question what is the White Rose or what ever type of flower about?
dimartiste - 07/15/09 11:31
I have several friends with friend issues. I am sorry that she is not there for you. Sorry about the Dictator BF. We (e:peeps) are reading about your adventures and wish you the success you deserve. Keep up the good work!

I think it took till my masters to either learn to be the one in the pictures as well as the one taking pictures of everyone else. Tough balance. For my show I only got like five of people in it. I even forgot the food picture. Lots of people so little time! You and your mom look like you were sharing a very srong moment of pride and joy!
vincent - 07/14/09 10:10
You look happy and seem to be emitting a bit of radiance.