When I was younger I always imagined 30 as being so grown up. I'd have matching furniture, a headboard for my bed, and I'd have all sorts of adult like things going on.

Then I turned 30. I found out that 30 year olds (or at least the ones I know) don't actually have matching furniture and for the most part we are just older versions of out 25 yr ourselves. That and no one I know has a headboard.

The point of this is I'm going on vacation next week. The best friends vacation. I bought the ticket from NYC to San Fran and then a ticket from Phoenix to NYC. Mainly because I got sweet deals on the tickets. Then all I needed was to get from San Fran to Phoenix. Well that ticket was $150, and I didn't enjoy that price. So everyday I'd log onto Southwest and look at the price, then look at my meager bank account, then look at the price. I mean I need beer money for vacation, right? So I called my mom and was like "hi mom guess what I need?" Her response was "Why doesn't Jessica buy the ticket?" My reply was "Do you mean Paul?" Her "No I meant Jessica". Then silence. I pulled the "but i live in nyc" and she said "no you live in jersey city". More silence followed by "fine here is my credit card number". Score. I really didn't plan to be 30 and still have my mom buying me things, but it's so nice when she does.

Also I got a geography lesson. LA is no where near San Fran. Who knew? On the map they look close. My mom and Paul were equally disgusted when I said I thought they looked close. If you had told either one of them in 1995 they'd agree on anything they would have never believed it.

Yesterday, March 14th was a beautiful spring day. It inspired me to pull out a super cute outfit with matching accessories and a jaunty little rain coat. The weather made me want to skip down the street and toss my hat (if I had one) in the air, just like Mary Tyler Moore. I was going to make it after all. Instead of skipping and looking nuts I played Bishop Allen and bopped my head as I took a walk down my street.

On my walk I came across a flier titled "Where is Ibby". Ibby is the owner of a fantastic falafel shop in my hood. He closed the shop about a year ago for "renovations". People are going nuts. This flier was looking for any information on Ibbys whereabouts and when the delicious falafel would be returning. It made me smile. Maybe I'd email this kindred soul in Jersey City. I pledged that this spring I'd take more walks in my hood. Bishop Allen encouraged me and I just knew this spring was going to be fantastic.

I then got home, opened my window to air out my apartment and turned on the TV. That's when my world came crashing down. Fox 5 news informed me that snow was on its way. Fuck. And there went all my hope for spring.

I'm back to being dismal and wearing black and staring longingly at the skirts in my closet. Fuck you winter.

I've been totally snotty and barfy for 7 days. I am pretty tired of being sick and cooped up inside. On Friday on my way home from work I think it finally took its toll because I almost started crying as I was walking home. Dramatic I know, but I can't help it. Now that the weather is turning I'm hoping I'm over being all thyphoid mary.

Then to top off my pity party I can't shake the Joshr thing. Is it because I want what I can't have or because I really liked him? Either way I need a random hook up asap to get this crap out of my system. I'm never like this about boys!

Thank god im getting out of nyc for a vaca soon. All of this pollution is really starting to cloud my brain..

I pre ordered the new Arcade Fire. Boy oh boy is it good. I'm doing the chair dance right now. As a bonus I got this sweet free CD:




And a Trading Card (?). I need to find some Brooklyn hipsters who also have these trading cards because I now have two of the Walkmen. Bueller?

So I'm 99.9% sure I'm getting dissed by the programmer dork. I'm super sad about it. We had tenative plans on Thursday, and he never called. At the time it was fine because I was barfy mcbarf with the flu. So Friday I called and left a message saying "hi, give me a call if you want to hang out this weekend." Now 24 hours later, no call back. I really don't get it. He seemed like he was into me. I mean he hung out w me and my sister, called after said he had a good time. After every time before when we hung out he said how much fun he had. I just got a feeling that he liked me. Apparently not. Maybe I'm crazy and he'll really call, but still whats the story with not calling before? I seriously don't get it.

Due to my whole boys suck mood I'm trying to keep busy. This is leading to me tearing apart my closet and organizing everything. I guess at least if im getting the diss my sweaters will be organized.