Score.

I guess I will be "bustin' shit up" in the Falls this weekend. Never thought I would purposely go there..for entertainment. But an adventure will transpire..

I know someone who has not been to Niagara Falls and they want to check it out. This is just the hilarious adventure that I am up for. The camera will be ready. Any suggestions on where to go? Eat? (other than porn stores, walmart and denny's?- I was just there). Of course my classist view on the area will be sure to provide much biased entertainment, but my company will most likely enjoy this charming side of my personality. What's not to love? ;)

hey hey, don't go there.

The way I figure, you don't have to like it: what I do, what I say, what I think, what I write, what I talk about, what I look like, what I laugh about, what I wear, what friends I keep, or how I feel. Not an exhaustive list, but you get it.

What matters is what I think about those things.


What do I like about you, gentle reader? Your views, your politics, your perceptions, your differences, your similarities, your choices, your desire to share, your secrets, even your ignorance.. but mostly, your ability to not give a fuck what anybody else thinks, becuase, hey, they (I) don't have to like it, either.

You are not placed on this planet to entertain me.

Unless you are a stripper, then Boy, take it off and entertain till the sun comes up. Or I am dehydrated.


On that note, I include a few random thoughts:

• I have school work to do. I am finishing a class shortly and have an enormous amount of work and studying to do.

• I am bored with my work. I am a plant that has outgrown its pot. In this case, my position. Lost as to what to do next.. education and career wise. Do I tackle that Doctorate that I have been entertaining? Do I switch gears and try something new? Do I dare settle with what I have now... ?

• Changes must be made. They just must.. My self perception and what is real are not the same.. strange indeed. I hear the "wake up call".

• I have learned to appreciate my friendships. I didn't realize it until this past year. I feel all warm and fuzzy, so I dare not write any more about it. Let me say, I truly appreciate my friends.. the ones who have been there and the new ones I have made. yay!

• I have abandoned my art. What is wrong? Where is my muse?

• I am thoroughly excited by life. yep.. In all its craziness, it is interesting to see how things unfold.. for the better and worse.. and better again.

• hmmm..Dashboard Confessionals. I forgot I had that in my emo collection. I have neglected my cds since the GoGoGadget iPod purchase.

• I gravitate towards positive people, as I am a positive person overall. Not that it necessarily shows in my entries, but thats the beauty of writing-- you just write what is on your mind at the moment. I have numerous years of writing, it is fascinating to see the different mental spots I have been in through the years--to see the change, to see where I have stagnated- to see My tale unfold.

Thats about it for now..

Take care everyone!

Respectfully,
Carey

I am eager for the weekend, as always.

Class was good tonight, as always, with this fucking fantastic teacher I have. I managed to get through the teaching/presentation thing alright. We made a video and just had a lot of fun putting it together for tonight. Never had so much fun in a Starbucks bathroom.

We are all part of a study group, which we use to learn from each other and work on group assignments. We meet for 4-5 hours weekly to take care of such assignments. Through this, we really get to know each other and come to depend on each other. The relationships deepen over time and it is fun to have that constant rapport.

In the beginning of the program, we choose our group mates. I had three lovely gentlemen and myself making up the study group. (I *knew* just what I was doing). I get teased about it all the time. Recently one of my mates moved after getting a police job offer down south. Another group was experiencing interpersonal issues that could not be resolved (I had been working on this for many classes, being the class rep) so one of their members came to my group. Now we have an even number of girl to guy, as with the other groups. We have a lot of fun during class and outside of class, which our other class mates have picked up on. There had been an occasion awhile back where we were huddled close together talking about something that I no longer recall. Whatever it was, was over heard by a classmate, and was taken out of context. It was hilarious, as they thought we were talking about something sexual. Not a big deal, but since then, things have built on top of that... now it is an inside joke that keeps getting bigger and bigger. I am apparently the Ring Leader of Perversion. "carey's the ring leader", cracks me up everytime. The fact that we ended up in a Starbucks bathroom (becuase the background music was too loud for our voice recordings for the video), just adds to our strange group tales. They aren't as risque as they seem..

SO tonight, while in class, I was in a fabulous (e:chat) on hot guys and fellatio -complete with pics. Yay! I am a very visual person. I could not concentrate in class.. at all. No blood going to my brain, I turned immediately stupid. I had to keep my laptop turned away from everyone as I feared they would notice and reinforce my moniker. My school issued lap top is full of interesting images. If anything happened to where it would need to be serviced.. yikes. It will be officially my laptop once I graduate. Speaking of which:

My graduation ceremony is May 19th (?). Although I am not officially done until August. It scares the hell out of me that it is now just a few months away. Yikes.


Yesterday I had received a phone message from the doctors office asking me to call back regarding some bloodwork I had done. They say nothing, other than to call back. I really could have used a "Nothing to worry about, just call us at your convenience.." No, this was a stern request to call back. Of course it is past office hours, so I would have to wait until the next day. I called shortly after waking up.

I get bloodwork done a couple of times a year to check my Thyroid levels. My Thyroid is underactive, No big deal, I take a little pill daily to get the furnace going. Then every few years, they check cholesterol, this is one of those years. I guess they also do CBC-complete blood count as well, I had no idea until they told me. Not sure what they look for in that.. I will have to do a search to find out (and I did not think to ask, I was not quite awake yet when I called).

Everything is totally fine. All looks very good, all the numbers are where they should be or better. HDL,LDL, TriGlyc, Overall, blood sugar, CBC and the thyroid.

My point??They could have just said that in the message. Ok, maybe not the specifics.. but don't leave a messsage that sounds like, "omg, you must call us asap".

bah.

I swear they were hoping for bad cholesterol. Sounds paranoid.. but the last conversation I had was about my weight gain from my injury and how I have not fully taken it all off yet. I am getting there! Comments like, "You've only lost 20 lbs in the past year".. when overall, in the past two years, I have lost over half of what I gained during the injury/recovery phase. I lost a lot the first year I was back to normal Yeh, i have slowed down, but 20lbs is still pretty damn good. I am active, I eat well and it will just take time. In the mean time, I enjoy the extra fluff. I have no hangups.. It is just interesting, this whole weight business. I also did not want to drop it too quickly. I agree that I need to step it up a bit, but to say "only 20 lbs"?? NOT HELPFUL. Then they proceed to contemplate what my cholesterol must be like. As though I am sowing on prime rib and twinkies all day.

So yeh, I tell them to flip back the chart a couple of years.. to see where I am at "normally".. then to look at post injury info and then to really look at the progress I have made. Every single time. I want to strangle them...

But I wont change doctors. Its just a once a year hassel. And by the end of summer, they wont have to be that way anymore anyways.,

One minute to Friday!

I thought about, with the added brain power of (e:ladycroft) and (e:metalpeter), that I might check out Glow in the dark putt putt, a haunted house and maybe grab some food somehwere... like Hard Rock or East SIde Marios.. depends on the time and what we actually decide to do. Depends on if our plans change.. but any more ideas on what to do in Niagara Falls, would be great..Too funny..

Good night, all!

I have needed to sneeze for over six hours.

six hours.

It is quite the insane feeling to feel the need to sneeze, constantly, for six hours.

SNEEZE ALREADY!!!

ahhhhh!

If I keep my nostril closed, it lessens the sensation.

If the earth shakes and you hear "WOO HOO!!" after wards, just say "bless you", 'cause that meant I finally sneezed.



That is all.

Carey :)

I want to play Tetris, dammit. I have an old school Nintendo system, circa 1985. I have a stack of games that remains, from back in the day. Mario Bros 1,2,3, Loopz, Tetris 1,2, DuckHunt, Pro Am and I should have a few others as well. If I get this system fired up again, I may make my way to the pawn shops to see who has some games lingering. I would like to find "Simons Quest", a game that (e:ladycroft) and I would play for hours; monsters, blood and mystery.. cool stuff.

I found the games, controllers (including gun) and the main unit easily enough, however, the ac adapter and other cord(s) were not found. I didn't look real hard as there are so many places that it could be stashed. I will have to continue my search in the daylight. I don't do basements or garages very well alone and at night. I am sorry I did not think to begin my search earlier, as I had envisioned a night of sitting in my underwear, drinking Guinness draught, bonding to new music and playing Nintendo.

I had other systems, such as Odyssey. Which was cooler than Atari. Better graphics, cooler games and it had a flat keyboard. I remember playing the game, "Cryptologic", where you would type in any word you wanted, which was then scrambled. The other player had to try to figure it out. Ofcourse we would come up with the dirtiest words our little minds could come up with. That game system was circa 1982, I think. I have a picture of myself with it at Christmas. It kicked around until just two years ago. I think I tossed it. I purged a lot of stuff in my last move. Including games to Sega Genesis (Road Rash!) and Super Nintendo.

Hmm, all this game talk is making me itch for a system. *thinking*, but not anytime soon. I'd be starting at zero, and I am well aware of the cost involved. So, not now... I will just have to play yours :)


I have some computer games I could play such as Myst, Riven and a few other similar games. I also have a paid membership to a game site, www.pogo.com, so that would be a possibility as well, although once I have something in my mind, that's just what I want. Dammit.


I was thinking about how I used to play a computer game, back in the summer of 1985, called "Roots" or maybe it was "Below the Roots". It played on a Commodore computer. I recall spending a week at an uncles house, and I would just play that game the entire time. ((I was 9 years old. Back to the Future was playing in the theater. I lost a tooth while watching it. My uncle had a really cool orange Volkswagen bus. Those were damn cool!! Back then I could stand up inside and my head not quite touched the roof.)) I would love to play that game again, just to see why it held my interest so deeply.


So tonight, no games are on my agenda. Instead, I have gone ahead with sitting in my underwear, drinking Guinness, listening to new cds (Insanity Wave, Psychedelic Furs and Morcheeba), and looking up information on dogs. Eventually I will move on to reading for awhile. I have about a half dozen books I am working on and a gigantic stack that I hope to get to on my next work break.

Tonight I will choose an entertaining and fairly mindless book, probably a horror or psychological thriller. Or maybe this book on a grassroots movement that is working on "causing a new form of spirituality to emerge upon the earth". An interesting read, so far. I will read anything, from any viewpoint, on pretty much any subject. I havent declined a topic yet..


The dog information search is because I would eventually like a dog. I am going to take this process slowly and thoroughly. I have never owned a dog. I need to make sure that I am able and fully willing to take care of a dog. Honestly, I would prefer to be a secondary care giver, not the primary. In this, I would be more comfortable if someone else took the lead. I have a ton of questions and concerns. I am trying to figure out when it would be a good time in my life to have a dog. I also need to choose a breed that will fit into and adapt to my lifestyle and apartment size. I may want a Newfoundland but my apartment is only big enough for a Chihuahua. Yet i do not want that kind of dog. I think my cats would laugh at it. In my search, I think I can go for breed that falls into the small to medium category. I know I need one that gets along with other animals.

It must not eat my cats!

I want one mostly for my cat Joe to adopt as his own. He is fond of "babysitting" other animals that I have brought into the house. He is fascinated by them, follows them everywhere and kisses them if he is allowed to. I figure based on this, I would want to go the puppy route. So there is obviously a lot for me to think about, and a significant amount of knowledge, time and effort is needed before and during this process. I am leaning towards a terrier of some sort, maybe a Boston Terrier? maybe a Pug? I will keep researching.. I will not take any action until I feel I am well informed and fully ready for the responsibility.

Joe checking on (e:Bambi) (she is ladycrofts dog, therefor is a peep by association!)


He's going in to steal a kiss from this strange looking girl.. I missed the actual contact he made with her.


chillin'.. but watchful.


an urge to tie up Bambi (maybe I need to reconsider dog ownership)


c'est moi!



And so, that is my night so far. I am keeping low, for no reason other than the desire to have a nice quiet night at home. The work week was a bit exhausting. I have patience, understanding, humor and some aloofness to get me through any situation at work. I only feel frustrated when people have within their power a way to make it possible for a job to be done better. The Autistic kiddo I work with are challenging, which I love, and I love the chaos and the unknown. I also love to see the progress they make. I despise people who have no idea of what we do, getting in our way. They do nothing but smother our morale and make for a dangerous work environment. Severe behaviors have led to a multitude of injuries. It is accepted that it is part of the job, but please do not make it harder by butting in. (little rant was needed, thank you). So, I could use a thorough massage as I can feel the tension in my shoulders and a few areas of overworked muscles. It is prompting me to up my physical activity and add extra strength movements. Primarily to increase my job performance..


One last thought (or one that has been there) on my mind: My current class, with my absolute favorite teacher ever, boosts my energy and morale. I could barely sleep last night after getting in from class. I wanted to fall asleep, but my mind was bouncing. Before I start gushing about him, I will end this. However, last nights class was a gentle kick in the ass about things that I have been thinking about for a long time. And that I will write about soon enough. (journal prompt)


Step outside and take a look at the moon..

Good night!

Take care and be safe..
Carey