So I don't know what's with me these days...
I just can't seem to get my mind around anything. Can't focus, can't concentrate, don't want to DO anything that I should do...
All I want to do is sleep and lounge around...
And it's not that i'm depressed, I don't think... I'm just... scatterbrained.
My thoughts are all over. Not sure what's right or wrong, what I can or can't do...
I feel like my mind is racing all over, but not really going anywhere...
People are in and out of my life, and I'm not sure if I'm happy about that... In fact I'm pretty sure I'm NOT happy about it.
I have so many good things going on right now, but there's still so much more that I want... And I don't even know if it's reasonable of me... I'm distracted all the time...
I don't know how to act... what to think... if I should talk or not talk.... act or not act... make a move or not... I wish people would just answer my questions and help me out... don't play games, my ass.
I hate feeling all jumbled up like this. Throw me a bone people, please... just a little guidance through this minefield... I feel like everything I do is stepping on SOMEone's toes, or else if I worry about everyone else, i'm not true to myself and MY desires/needs...
And, I'm eating too much and getting fat, and I just found out I have a cavity! I almost cried!! Well not quite, but I am quite dismayed!
nobody likes me, everybody hates me, i guess i'll go eat worms...
[that's a children's song before anyone gets too worried.]
Blah...
Distractedly,
-Eeyore
Jenks's Journal
My Podcast Link
03/09/2006 12:20 #23808
scatteredCategory: meep
03/07/2006 12:53 #23807
ok, i'll weigh in.Category: hotel
(originally posted as a comment to (e:enknot)'s comment on (e:leetee)'s journal [sorry, don't know how to do the links]- but he said (forgive me for paraphrasing) something about not wanting to see the anchor businesses of a thriving business section demolished.)
Oh, I am so sick of this topic, but I can't let this one go by.
ANCHOR businesses? THRIVING business section?
Correct me if I am wrong, but the shops in question are a clothing store, a video store, a head shop, and something else... tattoo parlor?
Now, I will readily admit I have never been in any of those. For several reasons. 1- I am too busy, and don't go ANYwhere (i've been here almost two years and haven't seen the freaking FALLS yet). 2- I'm not currently in the market for tattoos or bongs (though I don't have a problem with either). 3- the stores are rundown and unappealing and don't make me WANT to go in. And if these stores are so "thriving", why don't they fix themselves up? i.e. try not to look like shitholes. (blah blah blah, I don't want to hear about mobius). Appearances aren't everything, but they do not LOOK like "successful" businesses, they look like "barely scraping by off college students' beer money" businesses. You get the feeling they are only there b/c it is the cheapest real estate in town. Not exactly what I look for in a business to patronize. If I want to go clothes shopping, I can walk just a few blocks down elmwood and go to any of the numerous attractive, interesting, local stores down there.
Frankly, I personally (and by "I" I mean myself and any family/friends that may visit me) would be much more likely to patronize a hotel/retail building on that corner than what is there right now. And if you think that makes me some corporate sellout snob who wants to see elmwood yuppified and turned into williamsville, well you're simply wrong.
And finally- if those crappy buildings (again, I don't want to hear about the how fact that they're crappy is Mobius' fault) are the "anchors" of this end of the elmwood strip, then god help us, we are in DIRE need of a makeover. I'm not saying a monster hotel is the answer. And I support local businesses and don't want to see them put replaced with Gap and Blockbuster. And Dragonfire I'm sorry your house is in danger. But we all say we want what is "good" for the neighborhood. And good for the NEIGHBORHOOD (increased pedestrian traffic, more money spent, better word of mouth, etc) may not be the same as what is good for YOU (status quo, cheap rent, crappy buildings.) If we want things to change and improve, we have to at least CONSIDER, well- change and improvement, rather than just screaming 'no hotel no hotel i won't stay in it thus no one will thus it is bad!'
phew. ok. i hope that is all i have to say on this matter.
Oh, I am so sick of this topic, but I can't let this one go by.
ANCHOR businesses? THRIVING business section?
Correct me if I am wrong, but the shops in question are a clothing store, a video store, a head shop, and something else... tattoo parlor?
Now, I will readily admit I have never been in any of those. For several reasons. 1- I am too busy, and don't go ANYwhere (i've been here almost two years and haven't seen the freaking FALLS yet). 2- I'm not currently in the market for tattoos or bongs (though I don't have a problem with either). 3- the stores are rundown and unappealing and don't make me WANT to go in. And if these stores are so "thriving", why don't they fix themselves up? i.e. try not to look like shitholes. (blah blah blah, I don't want to hear about mobius). Appearances aren't everything, but they do not LOOK like "successful" businesses, they look like "barely scraping by off college students' beer money" businesses. You get the feeling they are only there b/c it is the cheapest real estate in town. Not exactly what I look for in a business to patronize. If I want to go clothes shopping, I can walk just a few blocks down elmwood and go to any of the numerous attractive, interesting, local stores down there.
Frankly, I personally (and by "I" I mean myself and any family/friends that may visit me) would be much more likely to patronize a hotel/retail building on that corner than what is there right now. And if you think that makes me some corporate sellout snob who wants to see elmwood yuppified and turned into williamsville, well you're simply wrong.
And finally- if those crappy buildings (again, I don't want to hear about the how fact that they're crappy is Mobius' fault) are the "anchors" of this end of the elmwood strip, then god help us, we are in DIRE need of a makeover. I'm not saying a monster hotel is the answer. And I support local businesses and don't want to see them put replaced with Gap and Blockbuster. And Dragonfire I'm sorry your house is in danger. But we all say we want what is "good" for the neighborhood. And good for the NEIGHBORHOOD (increased pedestrian traffic, more money spent, better word of mouth, etc) may not be the same as what is good for YOU (status quo, cheap rent, crappy buildings.) If we want things to change and improve, we have to at least CONSIDER, well- change and improvement, rather than just screaming 'no hotel no hotel i won't stay in it thus no one will thus it is bad!'
phew. ok. i hope that is all i have to say on this matter.
metalpeter - 03/08/06 12:59
You should get to the falls sometime this summer. Even if you don't want to do any activites you can stay on the American Side and look at the falls. There is some stuff to do on the American Side and a lot of places on the Candian Side.
I agree with you preaty much on the Hotel. Tired of talking about it so All I will say is you made a lot of great points.
You should get to the falls sometime this summer. Even if you don't want to do any activites you can stay on the American Side and look at the falls. There is some stuff to do on the American Side and a lot of places on the Candian Side.
I agree with you preaty much on the Hotel. Tired of talking about it so All I will say is you made a lot of great points.
leetee - 03/07/06 19:09
(e:Jenks),
To put in one of the link thingies to someone else's journal in your journal:
-go to the journal you want to link to
-click on the chain link thingie at the bottom of that journal and a box will open
-that journal will be at the top of the box and you can either save it, then copy and paste it into your journal, or just copy and paste it and close the box
Since i don't always give the bestest instructions, they are also in the help section. You will find help above the journal window and date, in the line that starts "rss". The subject or question is "what are those icons at the bottom of the journal for?" and it explains how to use the chain link thingie, which is how you would put a link to someone else's journal in yours. :)
I hope you get the time to go to the falls soon! I grew up sorta kinda around here (my hometown is only about an hour from here, it just happenes to be on the other side of the border, is all) and i took the falls for granted. I would forget that visitors might want to see it... and spend too much time taking them around Toronto. I have never done the Maid of the Mist, but (e:Uncutsaniflush) has (go figure, he didn't grow up around here!), but i hope to this summer. My brother and his family want to visit us and i think my neice and nephew would love it. Heck, i might too.
(e:Jenks),
To put in one of the link thingies to someone else's journal in your journal:
-go to the journal you want to link to
-click on the chain link thingie at the bottom of that journal and a box will open
-that journal will be at the top of the box and you can either save it, then copy and paste it into your journal, or just copy and paste it and close the box
Since i don't always give the bestest instructions, they are also in the help section. You will find help above the journal window and date, in the line that starts "rss". The subject or question is "what are those icons at the bottom of the journal for?" and it explains how to use the chain link thingie, which is how you would put a link to someone else's journal in yours. :)
I hope you get the time to go to the falls soon! I grew up sorta kinda around here (my hometown is only about an hour from here, it just happenes to be on the other side of the border, is all) and i took the falls for granted. I would forget that visitors might want to see it... and spend too much time taking them around Toronto. I have never done the Maid of the Mist, but (e:Uncutsaniflush) has (go figure, he didn't grow up around here!), but i hope to this summer. My brother and his family want to visit us and i think my neice and nephew would love it. Heck, i might too.
jenks - 03/07/06 17:03
Ok, yes, we get it. Mobius sucks. No one is disagreeing with you.
But, saying "Mobius sucks" does not solve the problem.
What do you suggest, Jason, BESIDES "no hotel"?
It's very easy to criticize, but not so easy to come up with a valid solution...
And how exactly does upgrading that corner "reward a slum lord"?
Ok, yes, we get it. Mobius sucks. No one is disagreeing with you.
But, saying "Mobius sucks" does not solve the problem.
What do you suggest, Jason, BESIDES "no hotel"?
It's very easy to criticize, but not so easy to come up with a valid solution...
And how exactly does upgrading that corner "reward a slum lord"?
dragonfire1024 - 03/07/06 16:44
Well again, we would not be where we are today if Hans Mobius would have kept his peoperties to code...ok so fine build the hotel. Whil we are at it lets reward every slum lord in Buffalo.
Well again, we would not be where we are today if Hans Mobius would have kept his peoperties to code...ok so fine build the hotel. Whil we are at it lets reward every slum lord in Buffalo.
mk - 03/07/06 13:11
you really need to see niagara falls if you haven't yet! it's usually the first thing i ever hear of people doing! haha
you really need to see niagara falls if you haven't yet! it's usually the first thing i ever hear of people doing! haha
mrdt - 03/07/06 13:03
right on sista.... out with the old in with the new. its not like the houses are fine examples of 19th century architecture.
what do you mean you've never been to the falls???? its such a such a wonderful and marvelous sight to see. during the summer I usually spend a few days a week there in wlking around, exercising or hiking in the gorge. i'd love to show you it sometime...DT
right on sista.... out with the old in with the new. its not like the houses are fine examples of 19th century architecture.
what do you mean you've never been to the falls???? its such a such a wonderful and marvelous sight to see. during the summer I usually spend a few days a week there in wlking around, exercising or hiking in the gorge. i'd love to show you it sometime...DT
03/06/2006 22:04 #23806
headphones, anyone?God I'm an asshole sometimes.
So my old ipod headphones died. So I wanted new ones. Not total pieces of crap, but not like $400 things either. So I decided to order two pairs with the thought that I'd try them out, and send one back. So I got some from Shure, and some Sonys. Both sound fine, but the Shures are way more comfortable. (and way more expensive too. oh well.) So I put the sonys on the shelf, and put 'send back headphones' on my to-do list. Finally went to do it today- I had to have done it within 2 weeks. (they were shipped 1/21). And I needed an RMA number. And there was a 10% restocking fee. Doh, my procrastination bites me in the ass again.
Ok, the point of this stupid boring post is that I have a set of half-decent headphones sitting here if anyone is interested....
So my old ipod headphones died. So I wanted new ones. Not total pieces of crap, but not like $400 things either. So I decided to order two pairs with the thought that I'd try them out, and send one back. So I got some from Shure, and some Sonys. Both sound fine, but the Shures are way more comfortable. (and way more expensive too. oh well.) So I put the sonys on the shelf, and put 'send back headphones' on my to-do list. Finally went to do it today- I had to have done it within 2 weeks. (they were shipped 1/21). And I needed an RMA number. And there was a 10% restocking fee. Doh, my procrastination bites me in the ass again.
Ok, the point of this stupid boring post is that I have a set of half-decent headphones sitting here if anyone is interested....
03/05/2006 16:14 #23805
bunnies and kittens and rainbows and...Happy Sunday everyone...
Just felt like putting up a quick post that is
NOT about the hotel
NOT about politics, and
NOT bitching about work or boys...
It's a beautiful day out (or so I hear?)
Spring is (technically) only a few weeks away...
St. Paddy's day is coming...
Lotsa good stuff.
Cheers to friends- old, new, and yet to be... :)
-J
Just felt like putting up a quick post that is
NOT about the hotel
NOT about politics, and
NOT bitching about work or boys...
It's a beautiful day out (or so I hear?)
Spring is (technically) only a few weeks away...
St. Paddy's day is coming...
Lotsa good stuff.
Cheers to friends- old, new, and yet to be... :)
-J
mrdt - 03/06/06 01:44
you're right we have lots of good stuff to be thankful for. this time next week i'll be driving in my brand new convertible mustang, playing golf, relaxing by the poolside bar and using my gift certificates for deep tissue massage and entry into epcot. can't wait for summer though --- riding my bike, havin friends over to enjoy good food/drink and takin Sasha through delaware park on rollerblades.
you're right we have lots of good stuff to be thankful for. this time next week i'll be driving in my brand new convertible mustang, playing golf, relaxing by the poolside bar and using my gift certificates for deep tissue massage and entry into epcot. can't wait for summer though --- riding my bike, havin friends over to enjoy good food/drink and takin Sasha through delaware park on rollerblades.
03/03/2006 20:58 #23804
New attitude-revisedCategory: girls!
So I've just had a bit of an epiphany.
And I've decided that: guys who don't appreciate me can just go suck it.
As you may have noticed, I've been doing a lot of "why don't guys ever like me, poor me, wah wah wah" bullshit.
Well, no more!
I just got a message from a friend that maybe snapped me back into perspective. It said "You are the most remarkable person I have met in years".
Wow! I'm a little blown away.
And it made me think- "fuck yeah, I AM pretty remarkable!"
I know it's not "nice" to brag, but when I think about it- I kick ass. I won't list my accomplishments, but they're there, and I know it.
I'm happy with who I am.
And if some stupid boy doesn't like me because my hair is the wrong color or my waist is the wrong size, then fuck him.
I don't need that in my life.
That's why I finally managed to cut off the deadbeat ex.
I want to surround myself only with good friends who care about me and are there for me.
And they know I will do the same for them.
I've kinda liked this guy, that I barely know, for a little while now... So I gathered up all my courage and asked him out. And he said 'yes, but not now'. And then never followed up, despite numerous opportunities. So I danced around on eggshells for a while, not wanting to appear pushy or over-eager, but always wondering "ok, well when then?" So then today I asked again. And granted I haven't given him much time, but so far, nothing.
I guess that's a hint?
Bummer.
But no hard feelings. Maybe someday he'll realize what he missed out on.
And if so, I'll be glad to go out with him. But I'm not going to sit and pine.
So I just got out of a nice long hot steamy shower, and I am going to get cute, and I am going to go out with my girls and rock the house.
They always say attractiveness is all about self-esteem and attitude, no? So then I am off the charts tonight!
So, my advice to any awesome ladies that have deadbeat guys (or girls) stringing them along- get rid of 'em. You deserve better than that. If they take you for granted but can't see how great you are, and appreciate you, then maybe they'll figure it out when all of the sudden you're not there anymore.
And to any guys out there who are taking their friends/girlfriends/crushes/etc for granted- Stop it. That's shitty. Realize what you've got. And let him/her know that s/he matters to you.
In the words of the immortal Stewart Smalley-
I'm good enough,
I'm smart enough,
and doggone it-
people like me!
(e:jenks), out!
And I've decided that: guys who don't appreciate me can just go suck it.
As you may have noticed, I've been doing a lot of "why don't guys ever like me, poor me, wah wah wah" bullshit.
Well, no more!
I just got a message from a friend that maybe snapped me back into perspective. It said "You are the most remarkable person I have met in years".
Wow! I'm a little blown away.
And it made me think- "fuck yeah, I AM pretty remarkable!"
I know it's not "nice" to brag, but when I think about it- I kick ass. I won't list my accomplishments, but they're there, and I know it.
I'm happy with who I am.
And if some stupid boy doesn't like me because my hair is the wrong color or my waist is the wrong size, then fuck him.
I don't need that in my life.
That's why I finally managed to cut off the deadbeat ex.
I want to surround myself only with good friends who care about me and are there for me.
And they know I will do the same for them.
I've kinda liked this guy, that I barely know, for a little while now... So I gathered up all my courage and asked him out. And he said 'yes, but not now'. And then never followed up, despite numerous opportunities. So I danced around on eggshells for a while, not wanting to appear pushy or over-eager, but always wondering "ok, well when then?" So then today I asked again. And granted I haven't given him much time, but so far, nothing.
I guess that's a hint?
Bummer.
But no hard feelings. Maybe someday he'll realize what he missed out on.
And if so, I'll be glad to go out with him. But I'm not going to sit and pine.
So I just got out of a nice long hot steamy shower, and I am going to get cute, and I am going to go out with my girls and rock the house.
They always say attractiveness is all about self-esteem and attitude, no? So then I am off the charts tonight!
So, my advice to any awesome ladies that have deadbeat guys (or girls) stringing them along- get rid of 'em. You deserve better than that. If they take you for granted but can't see how great you are, and appreciate you, then maybe they'll figure it out when all of the sudden you're not there anymore.
And to any guys out there who are taking their friends/girlfriends/crushes/etc for granted- Stop it. That's shitty. Realize what you've got. And let him/her know that s/he matters to you.
In the words of the immortal Stewart Smalley-
I'm good enough,
I'm smart enough,
and doggone it-
people like me!
(e:jenks), out!
mk - 03/06/06 14:10
You definitely have the right attitude!!! I talked to my ex-bf last night on the phone and it really made me realize that he is a loser and hasn't changed at all and not having him in my life is really not a problem! I'm glad you are feeling great...keep it up!
You definitely have the right attitude!!! I talked to my ex-bf last night on the phone and it really made me realize that he is a loser and hasn't changed at all and not having him in my life is really not a problem! I'm glad you are feeling great...keep it up!
jason - 03/04/06 16:48
I am going to be very frank. It is obvious you are not being patient. There are many things going on in his life that have absolutely nothing to do with you, that are miles ahead in terms of priority.
My advice is as follows - either you get patient and wait for his storm to blow over, or you forget about him and move on. Life doesn't happen on your terms all the time, and I am the freakin poster boy for that. I'll tell you right now, this venting is not at all helping your cause. I like you, I think you're awesome, and you do have many good reasons to feel good about yourself, but I am about <--> that close to advising him to abandon the situation altogether.
I am going to be very frank. It is obvious you are not being patient. There are many things going on in his life that have absolutely nothing to do with you, that are miles ahead in terms of priority.
My advice is as follows - either you get patient and wait for his storm to blow over, or you forget about him and move on. Life doesn't happen on your terms all the time, and I am the freakin poster boy for that. I'll tell you right now, this venting is not at all helping your cause. I like you, I think you're awesome, and you do have many good reasons to feel good about yourself, but I am about <--> that close to advising him to abandon the situation altogether.
metalpeter - 03/04/06 14:26
"Yes, but not Now" is a very strange answer. The guy sounds complicated. I like the new attitude.
"Yes, but not Now" is a very strange answer. The guy sounds complicated. I like the new attitude.
theecarey - 03/04/06 03:21
ABout damn time.. I knew you had this "attitude" in you..
ABout damn time.. I knew you had this "attitude" in you..
mrdt - 03/04/06 03:20
I want to comment but i don't want to offend. it seems like your attracted to the wrong type of male or atleast he's the type of guy that is intimidated by your fowardness. try ignoring the guy and make him ask you things twice. (rules of attraction.) people in our culture generally want what they can't have. or stop obsessng about it and be patient, it will come when you least expect it. whatever you chose good luck and I'll indulged in an expresso and interesting conversation with you anytime. DT
I want to comment but i don't want to offend. it seems like your attracted to the wrong type of male or atleast he's the type of guy that is intimidated by your fowardness. try ignoring the guy and make him ask you things twice. (rules of attraction.) people in our culture generally want what they can't have. or stop obsessng about it and be patient, it will come when you least expect it. whatever you chose good luck and I'll indulged in an expresso and interesting conversation with you anytime. DT
imk2 - 03/03/06 23:18
you tell em, jenks! any guys that turns you down is down right bonkers! you are a hell of a catch, hell, i'll take you out for a drink!
you tell em, jenks! any guys that turns you down is down right bonkers! you are a hell of a catch, hell, i'll take you out for a drink!
ajay - 03/03/06 21:33
Hey, we notice ya in cyberspace.
You did the right thing by moving on. There are lots more fish in the sea. If Lake Erie starts to run out of fish, there's always NorCal.. ;-)
Hey, we notice ya in cyberspace.
You did the right thing by moving on. There are lots more fish in the sea. If Lake Erie starts to run out of fish, there's always NorCal.. ;-)
ladycroft - 03/03/06 21:04
damn straight straight we're gonna rock the house!
damn straight straight we're gonna rock the house!
Take it from a professional doctor[*]: these are signs of an impending burnout.
I'd recommend taking a vacation or something.
[*]Sorta
I've been in similar straights lately. Maybe that's what got me to this little community. We can all vent together. Hang in there!
we'll talk.. we'll chill.. laugh,cry,scream.. and anything else.. That is what friends are for. (sorry if I have been lacking in that department *hug*)
I have been feeling a lot of the same lately. I hope you feel better :)
i am the king of hoping that people will stay in my life. i hate the people who come and go and don't really think anything about it.
it's okay to be an eeyore every now and then.