Today was pretty boring. Got a new phone, went out to lunch,...nothing special. It was really humid. Tomorrow should be better. Ellianna (from Cuba) is coming over. i better freshen up my Spanish.

This is my first REAL entry, the other was practice, so i don't really kno what to write. i guess ill just go with it. here i go...

I've come to the conclusion that people are strange around here, and not allways this insane in other parts of the U.S. i hope this is true, because if it's not, i really don't know what im going to do. Nobody around me is like me.

Everytime i find someone i think is a true friend, and lye to myself they have no flaws, they break my heart. Through my whole life, i havent had a true friend-for-life kinda person with me. Everybodys either to shallow, or dependant, or just a prude! (wow thats a old lady word! ) People are so up tight; they worry about everything!! People i kno don't have their priorities in order. They don't seem to care. Maybe its me...i don't know.

Thats why i want to get away from here. im sick of everything in buffalo. The snow, my family, my "friends", my DAD!! Spoken like a true teenager, huh?

Thats why its so important for me to get good grades. Most people don't care, but thats my only way outta here. No way can i pay for anything. gotta get scolarships. i kno i can.

i just gotta focus all my energy into that, which will stop the energy going towards my negativities.

But i don't kno if im doing the right thing. i know you shouldn't run away, but if youll be unhappy where you are, why stay?

Im just writing a short one to see if this works cause paul had to help me..