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Last Visit n/a |Start Date 2004-06-22 03:00:29 |Entries 16 |Images 24 |Theme |

06/22/04 11:00 - ID#24015

a start

So, my reason for joining this group - that is besides the mind control device inserted into my brain whilst innocently attending a party at a certain house on Elmwood Ave. - is essentially to get myself writing a little bit again. It's a part of my brain that has had far too little exercise in the last several years of dry and lifeless scientific paper writing. It's time to learn to enjoy this again and to collect my thoughts and understand my motives more deeply through it.
A short background:
Throughout my high school years I longed to become a writer - at first a sci-fi writer and later as a nature writer. I gained a lot from writing. It helped me to take a break from my life and imagine myself as someone else, as who I really longed to be. Yes, it was fed by my low self-esteem but it also helped to solidify my thoughts on the world and become more confident in those thoughts.
Years pass, I go to college starting off in Biology, then change to English as the bio dept. had none of the emphasis on nature and ecosystems that I desired. But then sophmore year something strange happened - I met people. First Bekah, who remains a close freind today, and through her many others. And what did this new found social life do for my writing endeavors? Well, at first it was an inspiration, but then a noticiable "kerplunk" was heard as as it took a dive straight into the earth. Suddenly, the biggest drive behind my motivation to write was swept out from under me. I was happy! I did'nt have to escape my life anymore.
So, here I am, years later, having graduated in Biology from a different school (where my desire to ponder the bigger patterns in nature and theories of ecology was to some extent satisfied) and having left writing behind in the dust.
Maybe this will help me to pick up that old rusty tool again....
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