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Jennbflo79's Journal

jennbflo79
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09/27/2007 17:20 #41365

random thoughts
Category: dating
I'm in a fairly good mood today and feeling a little more optimistic than normal. I think I blow things out of proportion sometimes. I've actually been accused of being a little dramatic. Hmm. I understand why people would think that however it's hard to take a step back and look at your own life sometimes. It's much easier for someone else to tell you how they see things, much more black and white.

I decided about 2 months ago, after I met this guy who literally tore me apart this summer, that I didn't want to be single anymore. Why on earth after I had my heart broken I came to the conclusion that I wanted a boyfriend I don't really know. I guess it's better to feel extremes than nothing. I wanted to try something different, since most of my men meeting experiences have involved bars and sporting events. I thought that maybe if I looked for people who wanted more than a fling I would have better luck. I tried the whole internet dating scene. It didn't work for me. I will tell you why.

Yesterday I pulled myself off match.com. I am not a picky person (well I don't think I am at least). It's hard to say what you want on paper, because it's possible that if I met one of those guys from match at a bar I would consider them. However there are things that are important to me that HAVE got to also be important to the person I would be matched with. You have the opportunity to list what you want in a relationship. The main problem is that people don't read it. They see a picture or get an idea in their head. One thing that I have found amusing is the sports freaks that I meet that think we are meant to be because I am also a sports fan. That's like someone thinking that a guy with an electrical engineering degree wants to hang out and drink coffee and talk about it. I love watching sports and I would like to watch baseball with someone, yes, however it does not mean we are meant to be. I just want someone I can get along with and that is sarcastic and fun and smart and likes to talk about crazy random things. I didn't know guys had such an opinion either way on redheads. I have really long red curly hair and I guess some people are into that. Then, there are those who are specifically looking for people who aren't redheads. Isn't that a little shallow and weird? I am 27 so I put my age range from 22-32. That does not mean 42. I had this one person "wink" at me who was in his late 40's, had long hair a mustache and no shirt on in his picture and it looked like it could have been a mug shot. I closed it out right away and that was it.

I am sure that it works for some people, but in all honesty, I'm interesting and good enough looking that I should be able to meet someone on my own and the unwanted attention scares me. The internet just stresses me out. I just need to get out more often!!!

tinypliny - 09/27/07 21:26
Better late than never.

\m/ Welcome!! \m/

Maybe you should come to (e:strip) parties. :)
vincent - 09/27/07 20:59
I was thinking something similar this week. From my perspective if you're looking for someone that falls into the "normal" range of descent to extreme above average physical looks and a socially average personality, they won't be online. Unless they're some super professional in a top 10 metropolitan city like Atlanta, Boston or DC.

To me it's almost like we have gone back to the early days of the net where meeting someone online was looked upon as desperation. The kind of thing that people had in mind back then is found right in the open on Craigslist, just look at all the penis pics you can find there.

I 86ed my match.com account last year. It just seemed that if i did end up meeting someone they wanted to turn me as a date into an instant MATE.

Then the flip side from a conversation I had with a decade+ long female friend of mine gave another frustrating perspective. Guys today don't want to ask someone out any more. They just want to come over or have you come over for some a NSA hookup and call it a night. She also said, "And they can't even do that well anymore like back in the day!"
janelle - 09/27/07 20:54
You have to just weed through the lots of bad ones to get to the few good ones. Drew and I both met some crazies online. But eventually he came along. I often marvel at the fact that we ever met, living in such a big city at the time and living such different lives...and that adds to the specialness of the relationship. And I'd rather have a nasty guy "wink" at me online than wink at me at a bar or work. Much easier to ignore and move on to the next, ya know?
leetee - 09/27/07 19:14
(e:Uncutsaniflush) and i met online, so like (e:Drew) mentioned, it can happen and it can work out.

In our case, we were friends in a chatroom that had nothing to do with dating, though. From what i can see, some dating sites seem even creepier than meeting someone in a bar.

Good luck. Love finds a way, if we are open to it. I never thought i would find love... and we will be celebrating our 6th anniversary coming up in about a week! :)
drew - 09/27/07 17:48
(e:janelle) and I found each other online, after a couple false starts. It works sometimes.

09/27/2007 16:12 #41363

jobs, speeding tickets, random thoughts
About a month ago I got my third ticket in 2 years. It was a cell phone ticket. I have got to get rid of my yellow car. I will admit to talking on my cell phone when I am driving and I know its illegal but there has got to be something better going on than to pull over the broke grad student in the yellow bug. I was at an intersection where no one was moving on Sheridan dr. I decided there was no point in getting angry about it and that I would just go to court to defend it.
So I went to court last night and let me just say always go to traffic court. It's really not fun, there are hundreds of people there, you can barely move, and most of your evening will be spent waiting around. My cell phone ticket got turned into a parking ticket. The town prosecutor noticed that my address was Ashland Ave and he wanted to chat about the neighborhood. He was so friendly. I am sure he has bigger fish to fry than girls yapping on their cell phones.
By no means am I suggesting that you speed or do illegal things in your car, however, we all get tickets sometimes. Make sure you defend yourself.

So I am still jobless and I have been for about a month now. I have been checking out boxes for my new home. I had been spending a lot of time looking for apartments in Allentown since I've spent the last few years on Elmwood, but you kind of need a job for a new place. I decided to take my Masters degree off my resume. I have an undergrad in Communications which gets overlooked. If anyone reading this knows any companies that I should apply at please let me know. I think I might just wait tables for awhile until something comes along.
It's pretty depressing to work so hard for your masters degree to have to take it off. I have had a few companies tell me they didn't want to hire me because I was overqualified and it didn't seem like I would want to grow with them. Its hard to convince an insurance company that you just finished your masters in sport administration but you really want to sell car insurance. SIGH. I might have to suck it up and leave Buffalo. I just really would prefer not to.

jason - 09/27/07 16:25
Jenn, I don't think there is anything wrong with taking something temporarily until you can get something you really, really want, especially if you would prefer not to leave Buffalo.

It has been a month, which, I would imagine, in our job market, is not a lot of time. Be patient, just a bit longer. Give it everything you have before deciding you have to move. Believe me, I've been there, and gotten a job in the nick of time.

Oh, and stay off the phone while driving!!!!!

09/21/2007 14:30 #41233

excitement
I can't believe how happy I am that I found this site. I have been meaning to find a new blog site for a long time. I don't like using myspace because everyone can your blog unless you set your profile to private. For some reason I have always been really good at attracting weird people whom I have no interest in. Im not sure if ita a redhead thing or if maybe Im too nice and I seem more approachable that i want to be. I feel like this is a great way to get going on my writing without having to worry so much about what creepos around the world are reading it.

I have been absolutely nothing but lazy today. Honestly though I feel as though I deserve it. I have been shot down for job after job in the last few weeks and Im starting to lose my mind. I didn't go back to school to get another degree for this kind of treatment. Ugh. Well anyway, I just wanted to post my first blog. This one wasnt very interesting but Im very excited about writing more. Im sure Ill be back on here by the end of the day!
ladycroft - 09/22/07 04:31
welcome!

perhaps the recent good job finding fortune of two peeps will spread to you as well. good luck!
museumchick - 09/21/07 20:56
I hope you'll like it here:).
metalpeter - 09/21/07 19:29
First of all welcome to the site. I think that local sites are better for blogging then myspace. I think that you should stay here and use (e:strip). Yes there are things that myspace is great for. But it most of the time it isn't used as an internet community. That being said myspace can be used that way and you can set up your blogs so only friends can read them. Hope you enjoy (e:strip) and keep up the posts.
theecarey - 09/21/07 16:00
welcome! we're excited to have you here! Very much looking forward to your writing :)
mrdeadlier - 09/21/07 15:07
Welcome to (e:strip)!
jason - 09/21/07 14:55
I am not sure if there is a public versus private journaling feature on this site. I think most people pretty much just let it all hang out.

Don't sweat the job rejections. The most important thing is to not take it personally. It's okay to be lazy and sulk for a day, but then it's time to get motivated and get back out there trying your ass off.

Good luck, and welcome!
leetee - 09/21/07 14:49
Damn, (e:James), that's what i was gonna say! Not fair. I'm going to tell (e:Paul) on you. Wait, i think he likes you better.

OK, enough of this highschoolishness...

Welcome to (e:strip) (e:Jennbflo79)! :)
james - 09/21/07 14:42
Well Jenn, allow me to be the first weird person you have no interest in to introduce myself. ^_^

Welcome to the site.
janelle - 09/21/07 14:39
Welcome!
jim - 09/21/07 14:38
Hello, Jenn, welcome to the site!