Besides my post one minute ago, I really don't write on estrip much anymore. I htink it is because I don't use a ocmpouter much because I use my phone for a lot of things I used to use a computer for but I don't like using my phone to type out journals because it is a lot more effort and takes forever and has way more typos even though I have lots of typos on the compouter but less than on the phoine. I am going to try and write more again.

So usually I take my walks down to canalside and walk around downtown and back. ANd people are often like oh you need to be careful , it is so dangerous downtown and blah blah blah. BUt frankly I almost never even see other people for a lot of my walk. TOnight I walk down elmwood and I see two car accidents, i got asked if I wanted to buy coke, I saw a domestic dispute, people smoking pot on the street and somoene getting in an argument with someone else which lead ot one of them saying " i am not taking responsiblity for making you a terrible drag queen". IT was really quite a walk. I swear Elmwood is way sketchier but more entertaining than any walk downtown.

I was watching this gay themed christmas movie this morning ( I know it is August but christmas movies are always in style for me) ! ANywho it is about this guy who is out at college but not out to his parents back in minnesota or montana or wisconsin or something like that . It is a comedy with a little drama thown in . Anywho so his boyfriend who doesn't know he isn't out decides to show up at his parents house over christmas break and then of course hilarity ensue and eventually he tells his parents and they knew all along and it is christmas cheer. Anywho that is only the backstory really to my post.

Watching this movie made me realize how much I really have a great family. Not that I don't always realize that ( I think I have definitely written about it before) but I really do. My parents and my brother are really the best family someone could ask for. And we are so not the like picture perfect Leave it to beaver type of family but in our own way I think it really works. Sure there was/is/always will be lots of screaming and maybe throwing and smashing things and lots of disagreements and we all disagree about many things but in the end I truly feel like we all would be there for each other at any time and that has played out many times in my life. WIth two gay sons it could not have been exactly the life my parents had dreamed of but they don't let it show. I never felt they were dissappointed or loved me any less. I know my parents will be there for me no matter what i've done but not in a just excuse anything I do kinda way but in a be there for me and help me and work through it kind of way. They want the best for me and paul and I feel like they would do anything to help us with that yet at the same time don't just do and solve everything for me. I also know my brother has my back no matter what. If I tell him I have a problem with someone, he backs me up no matter if I am right or wrong with my problem with the person and eveyrone needs someone like that in their life. So many times he has said "if you hate them, I hate them" or something along that line. He also has always been there when I needed him.

THe four of us don't do dinners every Sunday, or act overly sentimental, or are overly emotional or anything like that but frankly when it comes right down to it, my family is really quite perfect in my opinion and I couldn't ask for anything more.

Probably one of the craziest moments on days of our lives ever...so insane...and look at that technology....by the by this is from like 2005 not last week haha

I know it's bad but sometimes it seems like life would be so fun to be part of a villanous soap opera-like crime family like the Dimeras. Either way I need to start throwing more glass ware into the wall when I am angry. It just looks so cool and soothing.