As usual it has been a zillion years since I updated. Tomorrow is the first day of this school year (though without students) and it's always an interesting feeling. Kinda scary, nervous, excited. I had these plans like 2 hours ago to work on some "to-do" lists, maybe write in my journal, sit in bed and fall asleep early, etc. But now it's getting later and here I am wide awake on the computer.
I am much more relaxed than I have been for a long time. Since around the fall of 2008, I had all this anxiety where I would go through periods of feeling stressed, anxious, worried and short of breath. It happened on and off for about two years. I had a zillion theories as to why this was happening, but I think I finally realized what was causing it. I was talking to a therapist (who I won't even need anymore, probably...) and she said that some nose sprays can cause anxiety and to call my pharmacist. Well I didn't even bother calling, I just stopped using it because I had a feeling that it was connected, and voila. I haven't felt short of breath at all the past week, maybe a bit here and there when I was working on something, but in general, I feel so much better than I have for so long. I am officially finished with nose sprays, allergy shots, and as far as I am concerned, I am never setting foot in an allergist's office again. Yes, I have terrible allergies, but I would much rather live with a stuffy nose and itchy eyes and feel calm than be allergy free and constantly on the edge of panic.
So, at least I can go into the school year knowing that I tackled one of my biggest problems this summer. Maybe that means this school year will be even better. At this time next year, I'll be a married woman. And heck, at this time in a couple months, I might be a homeowner! I guess life is okay for now :-D
Mk's Journal
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09/01/2010 22:36 #52632
anxietyCategory: thoughts
03/07/2010 18:35 #51126
partay02/02/2010 20:26 #50956
it's pretty amazing......how easy it is to eat an entire pint of Ben and Jerry's in one sitting...
leetee - 02/02/10 22:53
good thing they don't have anything bigger, huh?
good thing they don't have anything bigger, huh?
mike - 02/02/10 22:01
or an entire pie with one fork
or an entire pie with one fork
vincent - 02/02/10 21:41
You planted the seed for me to go downstairs and open a pint of Starbucks Java Chip Frappuccino that I have had laying around the back.
You planted the seed for me to go downstairs and open a pint of Starbucks Java Chip Frappuccino that I have had laying around the back.
metalpeter - 02/02/10 20:45
It is also an expensive sitting. The amount of Ice Cream they give you is why I don't buy them, to pricy. Main thing is you enjoyed it. They Do come up with the best names and do make and very good ice cream, flavor wise that is a personal preference thing.................
It is also an expensive sitting. The amount of Ice Cream they give you is why I don't buy them, to pricy. Main thing is you enjoyed it. They Do come up with the best names and do make and very good ice cream, flavor wise that is a personal preference thing.................
12/27/2009 16:19 #50669
lots of thoughts on xmas breakWell, here I am on my 3rd annual trip to Albany to spend time with my "sister-in-law" and her children. These trips always make me think of many things, such as the consequences of having children. I feel like whenever I see parents with young children, they are either 1) stressed 2) tired 3) arguing with their spouse 4) frustrated 5) some or all of the above. It really does not look appealing to me in the slightest...but I know that there are many positives to having children as well...
Being here also makes me focus on my lack of exercise. I've had the same problem since the spring of 2008. I used to LOVE running. Like I was kind of addicted to it for awhile. Then I ran a marathon. For some people, that might inspire them, but not me. It wiped me out. Ever since then, it has been a lot of effort to get me to run for more than half an hour. It's so freakin' sad. I also don't have a friend to run with anymore, and that was a big part of it. Cory's sister and her husband are really active. They do triathalons and stuff. So they get to sit and eat whatever they want, and they talk about their work-outs, and it makes me really depressed. I used to eat whatever I wanted and think about working out, too. But now I dwell on how I don't work out and how I shouldn't eat so much. It's really a sad way of living.
So of course I think to myself, I'm going to change things! I'm going to dedicate more time this winter and spring to myself! I'm going to run again!
Except what's going to happen is, I will probably run 3-4 times next week when I have off. And then BOOM school starts and I will not have time for myself anymore. It seems like I can have running or I can have my job. I can't seem to have both. Because now I have millions of after-school rehearsals, and who the hell wants to go running after putting in an 8-10 hour workday? Plus, I have my Master's Project to start worrying about.
So basically, I need to figure out how to balance everything. After-school rehearsals, Master's Project, and running. It doesn't seem like a lot but it really is. It's times like these I wish that I taught elementary school so I would have fewer after school and evening commitments.
I feel very whiny right now. I guess I just have all these things on my mind. It seems like I'm constantly wondering if I'm doing the right thing with my life. I see my friends who make changes and I get kind of jealous. Do I really want to stay in where I am for my whole career? Let's face it, my district is pretty lame. I love my job but I don't love the district. There's just nothing there. No one seems to care about much of anything, there's no standard for excellence, and it's so small. It's nothing like what I grew up with. I constantly look at people at other districts and wonder what it would be like to be surrounded by more talent, more money, more culture. It's just a lot to think about. What if I left my job, and found that I missed it?
WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF
I think I need to get home, go running, eat some Ben and Jerry's, snuggle with Maximus, and I'll be a little happier.
Being here also makes me focus on my lack of exercise. I've had the same problem since the spring of 2008. I used to LOVE running. Like I was kind of addicted to it for awhile. Then I ran a marathon. For some people, that might inspire them, but not me. It wiped me out. Ever since then, it has been a lot of effort to get me to run for more than half an hour. It's so freakin' sad. I also don't have a friend to run with anymore, and that was a big part of it. Cory's sister and her husband are really active. They do triathalons and stuff. So they get to sit and eat whatever they want, and they talk about their work-outs, and it makes me really depressed. I used to eat whatever I wanted and think about working out, too. But now I dwell on how I don't work out and how I shouldn't eat so much. It's really a sad way of living.
So of course I think to myself, I'm going to change things! I'm going to dedicate more time this winter and spring to myself! I'm going to run again!
Except what's going to happen is, I will probably run 3-4 times next week when I have off. And then BOOM school starts and I will not have time for myself anymore. It seems like I can have running or I can have my job. I can't seem to have both. Because now I have millions of after-school rehearsals, and who the hell wants to go running after putting in an 8-10 hour workday? Plus, I have my Master's Project to start worrying about.
So basically, I need to figure out how to balance everything. After-school rehearsals, Master's Project, and running. It doesn't seem like a lot but it really is. It's times like these I wish that I taught elementary school so I would have fewer after school and evening commitments.
I feel very whiny right now. I guess I just have all these things on my mind. It seems like I'm constantly wondering if I'm doing the right thing with my life. I see my friends who make changes and I get kind of jealous. Do I really want to stay in where I am for my whole career? Let's face it, my district is pretty lame. I love my job but I don't love the district. There's just nothing there. No one seems to care about much of anything, there's no standard for excellence, and it's so small. It's nothing like what I grew up with. I constantly look at people at other districts and wonder what it would be like to be surrounded by more talent, more money, more culture. It's just a lot to think about. What if I left my job, and found that I missed it?
WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF WHAT IF
I think I need to get home, go running, eat some Ben and Jerry's, snuggle with Maximus, and I'll be a little happier.
metalpeter - 12/31/09 19:44
As some one who used to run I have kinda a perspective on this that is like yours, I could never run a marathon. Not sure if this is true or not, but some stuff that the runners (a lot better then I could ever be) in my family have told me or I have heard somewhere. That when you train for a marathon you train for a Half One first, then you get that "Under Your Belt" and you go from there. There is also or at least was a method to doing a Marathon that was a controversy (not sure what the right word is). The idea is that some people can't run 26 Miles so they run a mile then walk a mile. It was something like that.
In terms of the not wanting to run, that happened to me, after a full day you don't want to run that is tiring. What I have heard though is what to do is to wake up early and go running before everything else. That Run will give you energy for the rest of the day. Some people get a runners High and if you do then that would make sense. Not sure what works best for you but I say set the alarm early and start out slow and see what happens.
As some one who used to run I have kinda a perspective on this that is like yours, I could never run a marathon. Not sure if this is true or not, but some stuff that the runners (a lot better then I could ever be) in my family have told me or I have heard somewhere. That when you train for a marathon you train for a Half One first, then you get that "Under Your Belt" and you go from there. There is also or at least was a method to doing a Marathon that was a controversy (not sure what the right word is). The idea is that some people can't run 26 Miles so they run a mile then walk a mile. It was something like that.
In terms of the not wanting to run, that happened to me, after a full day you don't want to run that is tiring. What I have heard though is what to do is to wake up early and go running before everything else. That Run will give you energy for the rest of the day. Some people get a runners High and if you do then that would make sense. Not sure what works best for you but I say set the alarm early and start out slow and see what happens.
11/25/2009 21:46 #50383
trottingI CAN'T BELIEVE THERE WILL BE 12,000 PEOPLE RUNNING THE TURKEY TROT TOMORROW!!! THAT'S INSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANE. I'm planning on spending the first part of the race waiting to actually get started and then getting out of the crowd. Sounds like....fun....
tinypliny - 11/26/09 09:35
Is this on Delaware and Linwood as usual?!
Is this on Delaware and Linwood as usual?!
You also have to watch out for rebound symptoms when you stop using nose spray- but my god, Afrin can be a miracle drug.
But more than that- you're engaged?! congrats!!!
Maybe you should try natural anti-allergy measures such as locally produced raw honey (with comb, bee-parts, beeswax and all?). I have heard it's pretty effective if taken over a span of many months.
Some of them can cause tachycardia and palpitations as side-effects.
One of the mechanisms through which nasal sprays control allergies is by constricting the blood vessels in the nose and making it tough for immune cells from the blood to migrate to tissues where they might release substances that cause the symptoms of allergy. The chemicals in the sprays achieve this by binding to the receptors on the muscles of the walls of the blood vessels in the nose and sinuses.
But they can easily enter the bloodstream from a highly vascular region like nose and they can act on the similar receptors elsewhere in the body - where their actions could have a stimulatory effect on the heart. This is rare in the occasional user, but chronic use might create a risk of slow overdose. And it doesn't help if people using nasal sprays have some pre-existing/pre-disposing heart/nervous-system conditions.
Seriously, nose spray can cause anxiety?