In my dream, I lived in a city. I was walking down a sidewalk to my older sister's house. I was only wearing a short, light blue, terrycloth towel. Once I entered the exterior street door I was in a massive foyer. It had a rich and ornate church like interior. A double wide oak staircase was blocked by a thick oak railing. I used the small gate, climbed the steps, and entered the house through the stained glass door.

My sister was hanging out in her bath robe making some tea. My nephew was sleeping in his crib. We were just going to sit down for some cookies when the door bell rang. Still wearing my towel dress, I went out to the foyer. There were two (e:peeps) greeting me. It didn't make any sense to me why they would be there, or how they even knew that I was there. I invite them in anyway. One of them decided he was better off jumping the railing rather than using the gate. His foot got caught resulting in the rapid propulsion of his body over the railing thus planting his face firmly on the ground.

It was actually quite messy. He popped up with his busted self, blood running down his green shirt and jeans, and says, "Change of plans I'll fuck you later when I get out of the hospital". He and the other peep leave. I head back in to my sister's house.

Apparently my sister was very wealthy and had a larger number of staff at her disposal. For fun she made them partake in 'games' that I saw as a cross between reality tv bake offs and that crazy hysterical Japanese show MXC.

Next thing I know there is a giant Jelly Belly bean cook off. Five chefs had to make a jelly bean the size of a small child. I think they weighed around 50 pounds. They had to put their jelly bean in their apron and attempt to stay on their feet while going down a wide plastic slide covered in flour. Seriously! Needless to say they all wiped out. However it doesn't end there!

The bottom of the slide is in a basement maze. Here the chefs have to run around in near darkness collecting 3 artifacts and then finding the single spiral staircase to victory.

Ok, minus the cute little cartoon guy, these photos were all taken around Qatar! They are very insightful ;)


hello, here's my flag, it's hot as fuck out here.


yah, do it.


outward displays of wealth are the standard


even if you have to drive a crotch rocket


and there's always something 'special' on the menu


some things aren't worth trying though....


groceries? as if....


seriously!


in the event of an emergency, you're fucked.


and don't try to make sense of traffic, because it's fucked too


and the drivers are fucking crazy

Oque e um peido para quem ja esta cagado.


what's a little fart if you already shit yourself

A few other shots from my surprise visit home this winter


I hid in a giant box to surprise my sister


hugs


my nephew can now run around and say 'uh-oh'


i played uno with bambi, she's a real card shark


i got my dad and brother 'gudtras' for christmas


a ton of soft balls for my nephew


and a personal sized hookah for carey


i didn't realize they keep the fountain running in mirror lake (at forest lawn) during winter


i think this one is pretty

feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme, come on peeps, it's torpedo time!


down the hatch


(e:vincent) and (e:theecarey)


ball dropping master (e:paul)


the countdown


(e:metalpeter) tag team


(e:matthew) excitedly discussing education of little people


climbed to the rooftop via secret hatch, which exhausted (e:terry)


and made (e:kookcity2000) want to sing


i ripped a giant hole in my sweatshirt so had a little help climbing back down to avoid further wardrobe fatalities


Several peeps turned out of a last minute goodbye dinner at JP Bullfeathers. Just prior to it, (e:leetee) did my hair. I was in desperate need of a trim and fresh colour. Thank you everyone for coming out. I enjoyed the beer and company very much!


good times


the gel looked like pumpkin snot


guests (e:drew) and (e:janelle) left too soon for the group shot


as did (e:libertad)


the gang (and yes we're squatting to fit the photo)