i need someone to have sex with. must be hot and cool and charming, but not cocky or dumb. previous applicants need not apply. gay men and women, welcome.

im so over it.

i win, i win, i win, i win..........well...not quite.


ok, so i kind of tempted marvin and thats the reason he called, but still.
i text'd him, saying that he should not respong, b/c he'll loose the bet, but i wanted him to know that i miss him terribly. (because i really did)

AND HE CALLED! because that message made him sad :( and somehow in his brain, he thought he's already gone two weeks without talking.

but i decided to give him one more chance, b/c i led him to temptation and i want to be fair.

and no phone call.

so i said to marvin, that he would not be able to go a week without talking to me. he calls nonstop, everyday, all day. calls my cell, calls my work, calls my house. at least 5-7 times a day. i think i'm like his best friend or something. well...it's that...and it's that he really, really, REALLY... wants to get some of my booty.

he calls when he wakes up, when he goes to bed, when he's got women issues, when he's got ex issues, when he's horny, when he's sad, when he's taking a shit....you name the reason, he calls. half the time i don't answer the phone, but then he just leaves a 5 minute message that rambles on and on and on and the other half i tell him how annoying it is that he calls so damn much and end up aggravated and annoyed but it goes in one ear and out the other.

sample conversation

ringing phone.....brrrring...brrring..

me: WHAT!
him: what do you mean what?
me: I MEAN WHAT DO YOU WANT?
him: um...i dunno...i was just seeing what you were doing.
me: the same damn thing i was doing two hours ago, MARVIN!!! WTF!
him: why are you being so mean to me?
me: because you are calling me! what the hell do you want!!!!
him: fine bye.
me: jesus fucking chirst...BYE!


in all honesty, it's kind of endearing, and he does make me laugh, because really, he will NOT give up and tries so hard and actually he's been one of the very few people that 1. can stand me for extended periods of time, and 2. i can stand (for a very short amount of time). but it's safe to say that even though we broke up a long time ago, he has continuously been a very big part of my life.

however, i refuse to get back together with him. so his new mission in life is to get back into my pants. he tries so hard, and i tell him to bugger off each and everyday and remind him that when we were together he didn't want to have sex at all. and it's not like he's not getting any ass elsewhere. he's got someone he's seeing.

so i made a bet with him that if he could go for a month without calling or texting or emailing me, i would give him the booty he's been chasing...thinking that there was no way he'd ever be able to do it, but then the phone went dead and i haven't heard from him since.

this was on saturday and i have not heard from him all day sunday, all day monday, all day tuesday, and all day today.

i am starting to get worried. very, very worried that i'm going to be forced to pay out on my bet.

my mother is laughing at my stupidity with each passing day (naturally she asked what had happened, b/c there were no phone calls from him the last few days)

so the count down begins. i still think he'll crack.

yeah, that's right. i said it. i fucking hate when its nice and sunny like this, cuz every fuck wad and his grandmother come the fuck out of the wood work and decide they want to drive their big fucking cars all over the streets. it makes my commute home that much more annoying and longer.

i've def changed my mind. i want it to stay gray and dingy and cold. i don't want summer coming around, b/c then i'll feel obligated to leave the house and do something. i have grown so anti social over the winter that it makes my skin crawl thinking about being anywhere near where annoying humans congregate. i really wish i could live alone in the woods in a log cabin or something without a phone.

oh and did i mention i hate the phone. i hate when people call my house. i hate talking on the phone. i don't understand how people can spend hours and hours on the phone talking about nothing. anyone that knows me, knows that i never ever answer my phone. i don't return calls and rarely return emails. its not that i don't like the people that call me, (i usually just hate strangers) but i'm just not a social person in the slightest sense.

oh and another one. i hate obligations. that's why i never commit to things, because then i'm obligated to do them or be there. i hate having something hang over my head. having one trip outside of the house a week is too much for me.

and no, im not depressed, just annoyed. i don't feel sad, or hopeless or unhappy (unless someone is bothering me). when i'm alone i am as happy as a pig in shit. i just want to be left alone. (not by you guys...but you get the drift)

(faben has become a mini-me)