(e:Paul,4243)'s post about looking for a rocking chair reminded me. I've clocked a few hours at Charlotte Douglas International Airport between flights, and was very, very happy to watch the world go by from one of the rocking chairs scattered along the main concourse. What a brilliant marketing strategy. Nothing like being jam-packed on an airplane to make you really appreciate a good seat. If I could have bought one to sit on during the next leg I would have.

Speaking of brilliant marketing strategies, I was taken in by one recently. I desperately needed a haircut before the Bark & Whine Ball, but with my car out of commission, making the trek to my regular guy in Alameda was out of the question. It seriously had been like 3 months, so I couldn't even coax it into some semblance of style for one night. So I went onto yelp.com looking for: cheap, close by, likely to take me at the last minute, and recommended. Not finding a definitive winner, I popped over to citysearch to see what they had to say. Finally settled on a place around the corner from my gym. $10 off your first cut, and they could take me that afternoon with just enough time to walk back home to have lunch with my friend Leslie who was in town from Connecticut, then off to the Ball. So...

The cut was ok, no horror stories. I was happy when they gave me an appointment with Joey, since most of the reviews were about her. Also overheard another new customer appointment being made for her when I got there, and she had a backlog of new customer questionnaires already on her table when I gave her mine. Now I'm getting suspicious. Who has time for all these new customers unless you suck so bad no one comes back? I figure maybe she's new, and sure enough, she just started there last September. So my suspicions are somewhat allayed until she finishes my cut. There was one thing she did that I absolutely hate. I thought about asking her to change it, but the clock is ticking and I've got to beat Leslie to my house. Besides, I like to give people some creative license, so I figured I'd live with it a few days and see if it grew on me. Long story short, I doctored it up myself about a week later.

But that's neither here nor there. Here's the crux of my story.

She rang me up with the $10 off, THEN came the innocent exchange that solved the mystery. "How did you hear about us?" I tell her SFCitysearch. She says, "oh, we get a lot of new customers through them. In fact, if you write a review about us, print it out and bring it with you the next time for another $10 off." Ah HA!!!

I wish I'd known that beforehand. That would explain why there are 96 reviews for them on SFCitysearch and only 7 on yelp.com, and why they're more likely to be positive. Duh! That should have been my first clue. If you want to get another cheap haircut, you don't want to piss off your stylist with a bad review. And if you don't want to go back anyway, you're not as motivated to write a review. Brilliant.

Live and learn.

There are certain unmistakable signs of Spring, and I couldn't help noticing one while window shopping along the block of my local laundromat today during the 28 minute wash cycle. It was almost immediately substantiated during a brief glance at the craigslist m4w postings. (Hey! I had another 32 minutes to kill during the dry cycle! What else am I supposed to do?) As I'm sure you've guessed by now, I am of course talking about the San Francisco Fetish Ball tonight. I can't believe it's that time of year again! Several shops had the poster in the window, and I'm not just talking about Dark Corset although they did seem to be doing a brisk business today.

And no, I'm not going. I don't really have any fetishes per se. At least not that I know of. Not by San Francisco standards. And if I did, I certainly wouldn't tell you. Oh who am I kidding, you know I tell you everything. ;-)

p.s. - Happy Birthday again Matt!

Hey (e:Leetee,145), you know I would travel to the far ends of the earth to see the Buzzcocks! I have not yet heard of any confirmed US tour dates, but they are sure to play the Bay Area so maybe you could come here! And of course (e:Uncutsaniflush) is welcome too. ;-)

In anticipation of that happy day I changed my usersound to my personal favorite Buzzcocks classic. (Which is not the one in my title - although that is another goodie, and seemed appropriate for this post.) Enjoy.

Larry & I were just talking about the Buzzcocks last night after dropping off his 2 boxes of CDs/DVDs at Amoeba. (He got $461 for them! And could have taken $615 in credit.) Larry's been scanning the 100s of photos he's taken at concerts over the years. He sent some early Pete Shelley shots to the Buzzcocks' secretpublic.com fansite - they said they're going to post them later this week. I'll send you a link or post a preview here later. I'm jealous of some of the shows he's been to, but it's cool to hear about them second-hand.

Speaking of only getting to experience something second-hand -- let me take this opportunity to wish a Happy St. Matty's Day to all who celebrate it! (And who the hell doesn't, after all?) I wish I could join the revelers in person tonight and wish (e:Matthew) a happy 25th anniversary of the occasion of his birth, which we all thank our lucky stars for! You can bet your bottom dollar I'll be celebrating it here, though. Happy Birthday (e:Matthew)! Have fun!

I finally made it to the Rainbow Grocery co-op. It's about time, since they've been around for 30 years.

It's actually really fun to shop there, although it's like negotiating a minefield. Some stuff is very reasonably priced, and other stuff is like, holy sh!t! Nothing quite as extravagant as the truffles at Wegman's, but for some reason the "sea jerky" in the pet aisle caught my eye. Holy mackerel! Sure, with all those omega-3's I'd have the shiniest coat and the fishiest breath at the dog park. But $23 bucks! For a dog treat? I don't even spend that on treats for myself.

You can also pick up a nice assortment of hair colors. Some of these are pretty tempting.



And there's tons of gluten/wheat-free items. The soy sauce aisle alone was mind-boggling. Matthew, if there's anything you're having a hard time finding there, let me know I'll see if they have it here. Everyone out here has sworn off one food group or another, it seems. Apparently Californians have very sensitive constitutions. We should be called the "canary in a coal mine state" considering how many substances have been found to "cause cancer in the state of California" long before the rest of you catch on.

In other news, Larry is continuing to purge his apartment. I should be doing that too, although I'd have to get all my crap out of storage first. The last two weekends I drove him to Green Apple Books to unload four boxes of paperbacks ($240) and three boxes of hardbacks ($150). I'm really excited about tomorrow's mission though. Hard-Fi is playing a free show at Amoeba, so Larry's going to unload the first round of vinyl, CDs and DVDs. I get first crack, naturally. This is not helping my cause.

New usersound: Cash Machine by Hard-Fi

p.s. - Rainbow gave me 10cents off for bringing my own bag. Safeway never does that!

p.p.s. - I stand (partially) corrected. Safeway does give a 3cent credit per bag! I never noticed before.

Being at the gym is fine. It's coming and going that's dangerous.

You already know about the cashew [inlink]twisted,312[/inlink] den of iniquity next door to my gym. I decided to see just how many pounds of cashews I was going through in one week, then quickly called my own bluff. Some truths I can handle, but that's not one of them. So I decided to see if two 8.5oz cans (that's only $4.00 worth of cashews!) would last me a week. That seemed reasonable. It was hard, but I stretched them out. It'll just be easier if I don't have cashews in the house at all, no matter how much of a bargain they might be.

So I bought some soy flaxseed tortilla chips from Trader Joe's to satisfy the occasional crunchy / salty craving. For something so damn healthy- sounding, those things are pretty tasty. But not as addictive as cashews, so I guess they'll fill the bill.

Then on my way to the gym today I noticed a sign at Burgermeister's that Monday is half-price on wings! That's 12 wings for $3.46! 24 wings for $6.24! Hey, there's no law that says I have to eat all 24 wings at one sitting, but a bargain is a bargain.

It's funny because when I joined this freakin' gym they did the whole evaluation thing, and I told them my "goal" was to take yoga and pilates to counteract all the time I spend hunched over a computer. Weight loss? Not necessarily. Weight redistribution would be nice. Eat healthier - lose 6-8 pounds would be great. But mostly, firm/limber up, etc.

Well, they poked and pinched and weighed and came up with their master plan for the perfect me. Ok, I'll play along, god knows I could use improving. According to their printout, I weigh 118 lbs now, and my "goal" should be 116 lbs. So I ask if that's in 2 weeks? 1 week? what's the ultimate goal here? They say, oh no, 116 is the ultimate goal. WTF! 2 pounds! That's not a weight loss goal, that's a diuretic pill! Ok, whatever. It's ridiculous. I don't care how much more muscle weighs than fat, I definitely need to lose more than 2 pounds to be the ideal me. Whatever the hell that means.

It'll be ironic if I actually gain weight now that I'm exposed to all these tasty enticements on my way to the gym. I was probably better off stuck in from the computer with next to nothing in the 'fridge. I would gladly relinquish all authority for food aquisition to someone else. (Notice how I make it sound like a perk? Now if I could just find someont to fall for that, I also have a fence that needs whitewashing, haha.)

BTW, I love my Tues/Wed yoga instructor, Jehfree. Forget for a moment the oh-so-California spelling of his name and the fact that he's gayer than the Castro on Pride week. I unconditionally, unequivocally, love him. (Those short-shorts he was wearing my first class when I sat right in front of him certainly didn't hurt.) I love him without reservation, and I know he loves me too. Why else would he hold out hope week after week that I might actually contort myself into a one-legged pigeon balancing pose? That is so not going to happen. But he doesn't give up, so I keep trying. Oh yes, we're in it for the long haul.