You know what, I can't believe that it is two thousand and frigging five and there are still people who debate whether evolution is a fact or a merely a theory. The evidence seems pretty damn conclusive that evolution happened, happens, and will continue to happen until we blow the planet to kingdom or the sun explodes! And even then, evolution will be happening someplace else in the universe, I'm sure. I'm a Christian. I most definitely believe in God. I go to church almost every Sunday. I also believe in evolution. Why the hell can't Christian fundamentalists get it through their thick frigging skulls that the Bible is a collection of stories to live our lives by and not, how shall I put this tactfully, FACT! For God's sake! There are people that actually still believe in the Usher Chronology! That's just crazy! And the worst part is, is that these people, uneducated elite, seem to be spreading! Just look at the damn last election! Proof positive that Christian Fundamentalists are sending us all to hell in a fire and brimstone handbasket!

I really must stop being away from the strip for so very long. It is not intentional, I assure you, just a lack of anything interesting or new and to rehash would bore myself, much less all of you. But I have missed this, just spewing thoughts into the cosmos, perhaps inspiring, perhaps amuzing, perhaps just being a mere trifle to while away some boredom. And that is what I am doing today. Today is interminable! I work for HSBC and we are the only bloody bank in the Buffalo area that is actually open on a federal holiday, Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. And the real kicker is, that we're working on Next Day's Business, in other words, Tuesday's business, so there is no point to our actually being open and our being here. It's madness, MADNESS I tell you! Hopefully they'll get so much flack about our being open that they will be forced to close next year. I doubt that highly though. That's really all for now. Perhaps something, ANYTHING noteworthy will happen and then you all will be the first to now.

ciao!

Well, it's been forever and day since my last post, and somehow it seems apropos that this current one comes on the last day of the old year.

Why is it that the crossing over of a new year is such a thing for us, as a culture? I mean, really, all it is is a new day. Shouldn't we take each day as a celebration, as the purpose of something new and grand, each hour, each minute? We have the power to change our lives in a heartbeat, so why do we wait until a man-made ideal hits? I'm guilty of it, I admit it. I hope that 2005 is a better year than 2004, but when was the last time that anyone actually had a truly great or memorable year where everything went his/her way? In 2004, in January was the shuttle disaster, which I had all but forgotten about, and that is tragic in it's own way. At the end of January, my great aunt died. Three weeks later, in February, another great aunt, (from the same side and section of the family as the first great aunt) died, and my grandmother. In March, I turned 26. Definitely not a tragedy, unlike 25, which was very difficult. And then the rest of the year actually went fairly well, asides from a horrendous presidential election and that continuation of that wretched, wretched war.

It has been an up and down year for most persons of my acquaintance.

My current connundrum is a long-running connundrum and the only reason that it is current is because he is here, physically in town and being extremely vexing, which I'm not even sure that he knows that he is being extremely vexing. Why do I waste my time? I don't even know anymore. Stupid emotions! Stupid boy! Stupid love! It's so damnedably inconvenient!

Party On!

I've often said that when it comes to men, I don't have a type. I've known that I've always liked pretty boys but other than that, I couldn't see a clear chronology. I've liked dark haired men, blonde men, redheads, gay, straight. Asides from the prettiness, I couldn't see a pattern. Today, I figured it out. I DO like handsome men, but what I'm really attracted to is the brooding enigma. All of the men I've really had a thing for, sometimes bordering on obsession, is that they have this dark, haunting, hidden depth- something I could see and identify with and then spend a ridiculous amount of time trying to figure out. It breaks down like this- Phantom or Raoul? because really that's what catagories there really seem to be. The dark, dramatic haunted soul or the shiny hero .

I keep vascilating. It's almost a bad thing when you have limitless possibilties because then it makes it so hard to choose. I keep going back and forth between moving out into an apartment or staying at home, saving and buying a house in three years. I've decided I'm going back to school next fall to get my master's in El. Ed. and that's decided but it throws so much else into question. If I move out this summer, then I have to keep working full time as well as going to school full time. Or, I could go to school full time and go part time at work, if only to keep my sanity and my grades, but that also means that I can't afford to move out. Some people have asked, "Well, why don't you want to go to school part time?" to which I respond that I want to get my teaching certification by the time I'm 30. And right now, I'm leaning towards buying a house when I'm 30, too. A house, so much responsibility and yet, I have this picture in my head, so clear. That's probably not a good thing. It usually isn't for me. And so I will vascilate on. Eventually, I'll come to some sort of decision.