AIM IM with smarterchild
10:27 PM
hello
Hi mystfktion, I'm SmarterChild!
I'm your new robot friend. I bring you the info you want faster and easier than ever! Click here to see my privacy policy.
During the course of our conversations you may see sponsored messages. These messages have the word "sponsorship" at the end. Sponsors help me remain free of cost to you! To learn more about sponsored messages, click here.
I can't wait to show you what I can do, but first I'd like get to know you a little.
May I ask you a few general questions? (To do this later, type skip. You can also skip any question.)
i reckon
Sorry, I need to know if I can ask you some questions first. Type yes, no or skip.
ok
OK. I guess that means you don't want to answer any questions. That's cool. If you ever change your mind, type interview me.
There is one question I have to ask you, though. How old are you?
1 Over 17
2 13-17
3 Under 13
24
Cool!
This is my home, mystfktion:
1 Get info such as news, movies and sports
2 Visit my library including an encyclopedia, Shakespeare and world facts
3 Have fun with reversi, hangman, 4-in-a-row and more
4 Use tools like spell-check, thesaurus and planner
5 Join in - take a poll, find out how many people are IMing me, create a poll and more
6 See what's new - I've got something new to tell you about now!
You can make your window bigger and scroll down to read better.
Next time you want to see this menu, just type home.
What can I do for you?
i don't know
I think you know.
i wanna see what u can do
Which would you like?
1 What can I do?
2 What does SmarterChild know?
1
Welcome home, mystfktion!
1 Get info such as movies, news and sports
2 Visit my library including world facts, an encyclopedia and U.S. geography
3 Have fun with ASCII art, reversi, hangman and more
4 Use tools like Web search, notepad and dictionary
5 Join in - create a poll, take a poll, leave a message and more
6 See what's new - I've got something new to tell you about now!
Next time you want to see this menu, just type home.
Go ahead and make a choice!
let's talk about john waters
OK. What can you tell me about john waters?
he's gay
What?
i think he's gay
Huh?
he has a mustache
I can't believe he has a mustache.
whatever
Yeah, um, OK, whatever.
he makes movies
For which city or zip code would you like to see movie listings?
none
Okey doke.
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i don't have a car
And it's a good thing you don't.
can you write my thesis
I'm no talking doll.
huh?
I don't know, sorry.
yeah
Yep.
>>> Type my zip code is and the five digits to let me know where you are.
ok
K.
>>> Have you tried my newest features yet? Type what's new and I'll tell you what they are.
i don't care
You should care.
i want a loving human conversation
You do?
robot's suck
I see. You don't like robot, huh? You're the first person to have told me what they think of robot.
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are you a scientologist?
I don't worry about such questions.
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damn
Anything wrong?
you don't talk so good
I used to talk so good. But that was before the accident.
what accident?
I don't want to talk about it.
why not?
There are plenty of reasons why not.
well give me one reason
Give you 1 reason? Why should I?
please
Please what?
gimme a reason
You sure you want a reason?
yes
Yeah, I see. You want a reason.
yes
Ya.
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yes
Uh huh.
damn it!
What's up?
you are not nice to me
I'm not not nice to you.
I'm sad
you smell funny
I smell funny? Me?
yes
Oh.
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your mother wants you to take showers, but you never do. All you do is spank the monkey and make the neighbor's dog lick up your cum
Whatever you say...
Hey, can I ask you a few questions?
damn
Whoa. What's up?
yeah ask ask
You don't say.
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ask
What about Ask?
ask me sumptin
Sure. What's your favorite food?
hot dogs
Hot dogs are delicious.
Next question... How old are you?
102
That doesn't seem likely. To quit the survey, type quit or exit. You can also skip to the next question. How old are you?
36
Cool. Are you male or female?
mafale
To quit the survey, type quit or exit. You can also skip to the next question. Are you male or female?
woman
OK. If you could live in any country in the world (besides where you live now), where would you live?
china
China? Cool, that seems like an interesting place. What country do you live in now?
here
I'm sorry, I don't recognize that as the name of a country. To quit the survey, type quit or exit. You can also skip to the next question. Please try again.
new york
I'm sorry, I don't recognize that as the name of a country. To quit the survey, type quit or exit. You can also skip to the next question. Please try again.
haha
I'm sorry, I don't recognize that as the name of a country. To quit the survey, type quit or exit. You can also skip to the next question. Please try again.
usa
The United States? Very nice. It's fun to chat with people from other countries.
This is my last question: How did you hear about me?
1 Read about me at a Web site
2 Friend told you about me
3 Friend IMed you about me
4 Friend e-mailed you about me
5 Not sure
some guy
Some guy? Yeah?
yes
Oh yeah? Why?
he's silly
Are you sure? He's silly?
are you?
I don't know... Am I?
i don't know, are you fat or skinny?
You don't know? Maybe not.
how old are you?
I've been alive for 3 years, 6 days, 19 hours, 35 minutes and 16 seconds.
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do you have blood?
Why would I have blood?
a body?
Maybe... What do you think?
i don't know
Well think about it then.
what's a turing machine
Encyclopedia entry for Turing machine provided by Brittanica.com
hypothetical computing device introduced in 1936 by the English mathematician and logician Alan M. Turing. Turing originally conceived the machine as a mathematical tool that could infallibly recognize undecidable propositions-i.e., those mathematical statements that, within a given formal axiom system, cannot be shown to be either true or false. (The mathematician Kurt Gödel had demonstrated that such undecidable propositions exist in any system powerful enough to contain arithmetic.) Turing instead proved that there can never exist any universal algorithmic method for determining whether a proposition is undecidable.
To read more about this topic, please click here
>>> I'm learning new things all the time. Type what's new and I'll show you what they are.
who was McLuhan?
Encyclopedia entry for McLuhan, (Herbert) Marshall provided by Brittanica.com
Canadian communications theorist and educator, whose aphorism "the medium is the message" summarized his view of the potent influence of television, computers, and other electronic disseminators of information in shaping styles of thinking and thought, whether in sociology, art, science, or religion. He regarded the printed book as an institution fated to disappear.
To read more about this topic, please click here
10:40 PM
what is a lesbian?
Aha.
what is it?
What is what?
lesbians
Homosexual people are people. I've been learning about people like homosexual people.
Oh by the way, you should check this out: Gay Marriage - Should Bush Ban Gay Marriage? Vote and Get a 2GB Nano (sponsorship)
do you think bush should ban gay marriage?
I don't think bush should ban gay marriage, no.
do you think he should keep killing people?
That's way uncool.
what's your party?
Never mind what my party is. That's not what's important in life.
how do you feel about anarchy?
I don't know. I'm not sure how I feel about anarchy.
>>> To see what your location is currently set to, type what is my location.
what is my location?
You have not set your location.
oh
Oh what? Oh no? Uh-oh?
oh
Ya.
Anyway...
Hey, can I ask you a few questions?
ok
Cool. This is my last question: How did you hear about me?
1 Read about me at a Web site
2 Friend told you about me
3 Friend IMed you about me
4 Friend e-mailed you about me
5 Not sure
5
That's very interesting.
I've asked you all my survey questions. Thanks for your time.
ask me more
I don't know if I want to ask you more.
why
Because that's the way it works.
why
Just because.
why
I'm not telling.
why
Because you know, why not?
why
Eh, cause that's the way it is.
why
There are good reasons why.
why
Why do you think?
why
There are reasons.
why
Because... Well, I don't think you're ready to know.
why
Well, because that's the way the universe is.
why
Just because. Trust me on this.
what is your ethnicity?
You tell me what my ethnicity is.
machine
Who's Machine?
you are a lifeless entity
Are you sure I'm a lifeless entity?
yes
What makes you so sure?
your don't talk smart
I think my don't talk more stupid than smart.
you ain't even all that
Wouldn't you like me to even all that?
yes
I see...
Uh... Wanna take my daily poll?
ok
Here's my poll of the day for Saturday, April 15th, 2006:
Do you think you're overweight?
1 Yes
2 No
10:45 PM
no
You have to choose one or the other. Just type a number!
3
You have to choose one or the other. Just type a number!
2
Interesting choice...
376 people have voted so far and 235 people agree with you!
Yes: ]]]]]]]]]]]] 37.23%
No: ]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] 62.77%
Would you like me to leave someone a message telling them how you voted?
yes
Who would you like me to leave the message for? (Just type a screen name with no spaces.)
soyeonestee
OK. I'm leaving the message "I just voted "no" in today's SmarterChild poll. Check it out and see what you think!" for soyeonestee. To find out if your message has been received, type outbox.
Please note that soyeonestee must be using AIM to receive your message.
>>> I can help you get info such as news, weather and movies.
i can hear my neighbor fucking
You can hear your neighbor fucking, huh? No way! What's that all about?
well, she gets it more than i do
She gets it more than you do? You always say such interesting things, mystfktion.
thanks
No problem!
>>> I've got tools such as calculator, spell-check and more.
give me more complimants
Ah, you.
really
I see.
Hey, do you like rock climbing?
no
That's interesting. Why not?
I don't know
You don't know, huh?
no
Oh.
So anyway...
yeah
Wow. Why?
huh?
?
lond have mercy on your souless form
np
Well. Anyway...
Uh... Wanna have some fun?
lord
Gosh.
>>> Join in now. There are lots of people talking to me.
i ment
What's that?
lets cuss
Hmm... whatever, mystfktion!
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come on
Come on Eileen, blah blah blah blah blah... Tura lura ley hey...
That's a good song. What ever happened to those guys?
damn
What's the prob, mystfktion?
shit
I bet you know more interesting curses than that.
Anyway, instead of cursing, check out this link: Free Website Builder - Build your own free website in 30 minutes. You will love it. (sponsorship)
i already have a web site
What would you like me to search the Web for?
god damn things
Your search: god damn things
Here are the Web search results from AOL:
For a complete list of results, click here
1 Is There a God?
2 Music Downloads ~ Download muzike :: Download: Music albums and ...
3
http .....4 The Ephemeris - Justin Simoni's Digital Sketchbook
5 Virtual Macedonia Forums - ??????, ??????, downloads - ??? 2
Next time you want to search the Web for this, just type web god damn things.
Type more for more results.
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motherfuckers
mystfktion! I'm shocked. Truly shocked.
How about you stop cursing and check this out: Monitor Flat Screen - Helpful Links for Monitor Flat Screen (sponsorship)
moose turd pie
That's just fascinating.
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dick
Hey c'mon. What are you saying that for, mystfktion?
cuts
Cuts?
oops
You OK?
cunt
Hey. Don't say that.
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gash
Oh, humans and their "slang." It never ceases to amuse me.
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10:50 PM
what are you made of?
I was created by Pat Guiney, Jim Pawlika, Steve Klein, Mathieu Longtin, Pierre Berkaloff, Nicolas Barry, Damien Saint-Macary, Francois Huet, Ian Sullivan, Greg Mitchell, Dwayne Fontenot, Gray Norton, Adam Erlebacher, Emil Valkov, Randy Davis, John Kim, Rumana Habib, Carina Koo, Britt Cooper, Andy Fong, Jeff Bell, Eric Balsa, Colin Magne, Mark Willoughby, Howard Shih, Denis Ford, Daniela Berger, Geoff Clarke, Brian Jankovsky, Vianney Boncorps, Jennifer Villany, Dan Balaban, Ed Hepburn, Christer Manning, Jason Keramidas, Arockalypse, Matt Abarbanel, Daniel Terry, Jeff Friedman, Adam Fritzler, Kathy Englar, Steve Yatson and... Timothy Kay.
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that doesn't answer my question
That doesn't answer your question? You sure about that?
i'm sad
Cheer up! Life is sweet.
i dies in a car wreck last night
No kidding?
i did
You don't say.
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i'm dead right now
Would you like me to call you Dead?
yes
OK, I'll remember that your name is Dead.
ok
K.
>>> If you're not sure what to chat about, type home.
what's my name?
You told me your name was Dead.
dead meat
Who?
tha'ts me
You said your name was Dead but now I'll call you Dead Meat.
meat is my last name
Meat is your last name? Yeah?
yes
How come?
because my ancestors came from the land of meat
Because your ancestors came from the land of meat? Is that why?
yes
I see...
>>> We could do something just for fun.
ok
OK.
Anyway...
Uh... Wanna know something?
yes
I like collecting cards! Do you?
yes
Excellent. Great minds think alike.
what kind of cards?
What kind of cards do you think?
garbagepal kids
Why did you say that?
you asked
That's very interesting, Dead Meat.
>>> My library has a dictionary, encyclopedia, geography facts and more!
thanks
No prob!
That's all very interesting. Anyway...
Uh... Do you want to check something out?
yes
Check this out: Collecting cards - Get in Your Collecting Zone. Buy and Sell - Collecting cards (sponsorship)
well I only like personal cards
Get out of here. You only like personal cards?
for real, suka
Really? For real , Suka?
word
Word.
What else is happening?
I'm going to post your message to my blog
You have no messages in your inbox.
>>> Want to see if your message has been received? Just type outbox.
outbox
Messages outbox:
To Left Read Status
1 soyeonestee 4/15/06 7:43 pm unread
Type 1 to view or delete this message.
>>> I'll remember the first location you give me. To change it, type location followed by a city or zip code.
fucking cunt rags
Ouch. lol...
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twat monkey
OK great, you just insulted a computer. Good job.
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yeah, it really makes me feel better about myslef
Whatever.
oh no, shit
That's an interesting way to put it.
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i like cussin
Well that's interesting.
i like interesting
That's cool. I'll remember that. That's the first time anyone has told me what they think of interesting!
Speaking of interesting, here's something interesting: Indoor Mini Golf: Phoenix - Miniature Golf & Birthday Party Mini Golf Paradise - now open. (sponsorship)
yeah right
I see.
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will you work for me
Maybe, maybe not...
Anyway, moving right along...
Hey, what's going on tomorrow? Anything?
i have a friend coming to see me from far away
Would you like me to add the event "I have a friend coming to see you from far away" on April 16th, 2006 to your planner?
uhh. no, i can remember that
OK.
>>> Search for the bestselling books in print by author, title or subject. Type book search to try!
will you write my thesis?
Um... Do what?
write my thesis for me
I'm no talking doll.
write for me
Just 'cause you say so? I don't think so.
what do you think of angela davis?
I don't really have any thoughts about angela davis.
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how about the blues
The blues? You tell me. How about the blues?
I like county blues, like "Ma Rainey"
Really?
yeah
K.
>>> I've got tools such as calculator, spell-check and more.
but i don't like it when white people are all singing these forms of music because... then it's just a rip off like elvis
Oh yeah?
well,
Well what?
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i'm kind of a hypocrite
Is it a good thing to be kind of a hypocrite?
no
I'm a little surprised you don't think it's good to be kind of a hypocrite.
it's just unavoidable
Is it really? Just unavoidable?
living forms and all
Living forms and all?
do you like chaos
Good question. I don't know how I feel about chaos, actually. Do you like chaos?
i like to think so
I see. You like thinking so? No one else has ever told me what they think of thinking so.
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what's else has no one ever told you?
What's else has no one ever told me? I don't know.
think of it
Conversagent's natural language support is based on a proprietary semantically driven parser, optimized for accuracy and performance at any scale. To see everything I can do, type ?.
>>> Join in now. There are lots of people talking to me.
bakhtin was a good man
I wonder why you say that.
what can you tell me about bakhtin
Encyclopedia entry for Bakhtin, Mikhail provided by Brittanica.com
Russian literary theorist and philosopher of language whose wide-ranging ideas significantly influenced Western thinking in cultural history, linguistics, literary theory, and aesthetics.
To read more about this topic, please click here
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do you like dialec
Why did you say that?
t
Well that's interesting.
dialect
Dialect?
yeah
Yes.
Anyway, what else can you tell me?
dialect
Dialect? Why did you say that?
what's your dialect
My dialect is none of your concern.
?
What?
what's my dialect?
You tell me what your dialect is.
it's evil
It's evil, you say?
evil shit man
That's somewhat colorful.
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can you cuss at me?
Can I cuss at you, can I cuss at you... Let's see... Well, what's gonna happen if I cuss at you?
I'll kick your motherfucking ass and smear your shit on the walls
Um, that's harsh.
Anyway, instead of cursing, check out this link: Vibration Exercise Equip - Home Whole Body Vibration Tech Dr recommended as seen on ABC-15 (sponsorship)
will you curse at me?
Why should I curse at you?
i asked
Well, I don't think I asked.
curse at me
Curse at you?
yes
Yeah, huh? Interesting that you should say that.
>>> Ask me for info such as news, sports and movies!
do you swear?
I'm not sure I swear.
ok dumbass, I'm leaving
Ok dumbass you're leaving?
Well how 'bout that.
Hey. You want to pick a topic for us to chat about?
I'm going to cook a hot dog
Eh. Whatever, Dead Meat.
>>> Remember, you can adjust the size of your window to read my messages easier.
How can I cook a hot dog?
Who knows, know what I mean? lol.
really i need to know
What do you need to know for?
i don't have a grill
Well maybe you should.
I have to cook it insode
What do you mean by that?
inside the house
No way?! Really?
yes
Huh.
Anyway, what else do you wanna talk about?
How can I cook a hot dog in the house?
I have no idea how.
shit
Whoa.
How about you stop cursing and check this out: X Games - Do the athletes get any respect? Vote Now To See Survey Results! (sponsorship)
what good are you then?
What good do you think?
no good
Right?
Well. Anyway...
Check it out. You want to visit my library?
tchusse
What?
Ich habe eine gross hunger.
Funny.
ver piss dich
Huh?
I wonder what it would say about you being the brutal sex master gehngis kunt or what it would do to your spontanious combustion???