Remind me never to get married. Weddings are an absolute schlep! I’m am sick, sick, sick of all this crap, crap, crap! I thought the whole idea of the wedding ceremony was to celebrate the union of two people. Ha! It’s all just a commercialized money making machine that gets everyone’s panties in twist! Seriously, $300 for cake, $1,000 for flowers??? That’s just the financial factor. If I get yelled at for one more thing, look out, because Broadzilla is surfacing!

I’m not even IN the wedding, but somehow I am responsible for:
1. Finding a babysitter (still need one)
2. Making giant signs (which are still not done after 30 hours of work)
3. Rigging up 10,000 imported Italian twinkle lights (ok, I stole that from Christmas Vacation, but I do have to rig up about 1,000 lights)
4. Calling all the non-responsive guests
5. Collecting ivy (don’t ask)
6. Taking my mother to 20 shops looking for a dress (not my cup of tea)
7. Taking my mother to have the dress fitted
8. Planning my brother’s bachelor party (what the hell!?!)
9. Sending out invites for his party
10. Sending out new invites to his party after finding out all the information I got was wrong
11. Fitting my dad’s pants
12. Picking up my dad’s shoes
13. Doing my mother’s hair (I’ve got my own hair to worry about)
14. Renting a car (because we don’t have enough space for everyone in the family to get carted around)
15. Writing the best man’s speech (this is nuts!!).

I don’t think 2 hours can pass without me taking heat for something wedding related. I’ve become an expert in taking heat. I get blamed for the rain falling on the Earth, but I just smile and say, ‘Kiss my chocolate starfish’. Of course what they hear is, ‘My bad, you’re right, you’re always right, why do I ever doubt you’. Ciao.

Taking a break from making signs for my brother's wedding. Glitter everywhere! I noticed (e:Jessbob) and (e:Jason) had done a humor test. I had to join in the fun, even if my results make me seem like a freakish pervert. Ciao.

The Shock Jock (60% dark, 56% spontaneous, 55% vulgar)
Your humor style: VULGAR | SPONTANEOUS | DARK
Your sense of humor is off-the-cuff and kind of gross. Is it is also sinister, cynical, and vaguely threatening to the purer folks of this world, and you probably gets off on that. You would cut a greasy fart, and then blame it on your mom and then just shrug when someone pointed out that she's dead.

Yours is hands-down the most outrageous sense of humor; you like things trangressive and hardcore. It's highly likely (a) you have no limits (b) you have no scruples and (c) you have no job. Ironically, it's your type of humor that can make the biggest bucks in show business.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 61% on dark
You scored higher than 69% on spontaneous
You scored higher than 69% on vulgar

Just got word this morning, I’m going to have a nephew! It will be nice to have a little person in my life that I’m actually related to. Don’t get me wrong, I love my Goddaughter, she’s a cutie pie, it will just be super fun to be called Auntie Mika – and really be the Aunt! I’m already envisioning all the cool things we’ll do when he’s big enough. All the things his parents won’t let him do, count on Auntie Mika to make it happen. Do they have baby bungee? Ha-ha. I think most everyone is lucky enough to have that one super fly aunt or uncle that rocks the house. That’s my plan, Lady Croft, professor, Adventuring 101.

I finally got that grease out of my white pants. [inlink]ladycroft,23[/inlink] Amazing eh? Oxi Clean to the rescue! I still have to do some mending to the damage zones, but the white cargos will dance once more.

Looking forward to meeting many new folks on Saturday, hope to see you there! Ciao.

I took the green machine out for a spin last night. I was so excited to have my new tires on. I took about 6 pedals, started to cross a big intersection and BAM – there goes my chain! Did I ever mention I have an interesting history with bicycles? The chain was fixed and we were on the road again. Moving along, everything is peachy. We get to the park, I’m cruising along and WHAM – my freaking pant leg got wrapped in the chain and almost flipped me off my seat! I was stuck, completely and utterly stuck in my chain! Luckily (e:DrChlorine) was there to save the day and free me from my greasy prison. Thanks Dr.C.! Anyone know how to get grease out of white pants!? 8*


Bambi has been draggin her tail the last 2 weeks since the death of her 'sister' Twigi. To add to her despondency, I had to take her to the vet today to have a lump removed from her neck. I didn't realize I'd be getting a Frankepoochie when I picked her up this afternoon! She's got 3 staples lodged in her neck over a seriously large cut. She gave me the cold snout when I picked her up, she doesn't even want to 'speak' to me right now. Our four legged allies have such personality.

Lastly, I finally got my sound loaded, so go check it out – it’s hot! Ciao.

I finally got to see ‘Romeo & Juliet’ at Shakespeare in Delaware Park last night. I love Shakespeare, I love being outside, I love theatre; smashing combination. Most of the cast was good, but I must give a big bravo for Paul Todaro who played Mercutio. He was outstanding! It’s neat to think some 400 odd years ago, people were sitting about the stage listening to the very same words that fell upon my ears. Isn’t that amazing? I took this photo, it seemed appropriate.


When Shakespeare was done I went in search of sustenance. Pizza was attempted, but everything seems to close so early. I ended up grabbing some spinach and rice at Pano’s. Tasty. At 12:30 there was an interesting procession of about 3 dozen bicyclers cruising down Elmwood. Little bells ringing, streamers flapping, squeaky horns honking… can anyone fill me in on this? Ciao.