so... I've been dating this guy for about a month and a half and he really likes me. but i still think i really have feelings for my ex.

so the guy i'm currently with (let's call him Z) is, like i said, really nice and he relaly really likes me.

but my ex (lets call him X) wasnt as into me, but i was so much more into him than i am into Z.

and what was a total red flag to me about me and Z occured the other night:
so i was out at a bar with Z and i saw X there, and my stomach was flipping, i really missed him. then he went out of his way and came up to me and talked to me. it was like the first time in a while we really talked since he broke up with me. (and i know i will never go back out with X since he did break up with me, im just not going to do that)

but here is my question: what do i do about Z???

i really don't think i am all that into him physically. i'm just not attracted to him. i think if i was attracted to Z as much as X then i would totally be into him. but i know how much he likes me and i would never want to hurt him like that. but then again, im not entirelly sure that i don't like him, that there isn't any potential...

should I:
a) keep things the way they are and see where it goes?
b) end it right now before it goes any farther?
c) tell him how i feel and see how he takes it?
d) any suggestions???

and by the way, i really can't see myself doing either b or c...

ok, so the other day i discovered google earth, and boy was i amazed!!! i found my home in hamburg and then (e:amanda)'s house which was easy cuz she's got a huge pool, and i just went searching around the buffalo area while i was waiting in one of the computer labs, before i could go to the other room for my class to start.

ok, so i spent that day mainly in the western new york area while this evening, i decided to download it myself on my computer and check out Miami a little bit. so i found the university of Miami, which definitely looks different than those little maps they have around so little freshmen and visitors don't get all lost. but then i went searching for our apartment, which really wasn't a big challenge, we are practically right across the street from school. but upon finding our building, i found a little something extra on our roof...

it appears that we have a pool on our roof!!! now i know the building next door has a pool on the roof, I've been up there with my landlord before, but Rachel, my roommate, and i had no idea we had a pool too!!! i'm still kinda amazed!!! we are on the third floor, who's apartment is filled with a pool???

well here's a picture. we are in the longer narrower building, and the one just to the south of us is the one I've been on the roof of and i know that's a pool...



so do we have a pool on our roof too??? i wanna go up there!!!!

ok, so remember back like a month ago when (e:amanda) broke my sink?? and we spent days trying to fix it, but instead of fixing it, we totally destroyed the screw making it nearly impossible to fix??? and then our terrible landlord lady was, well... useless.

SO... after much procrastination and many times burning my hands, face and mouth (since we only had access to the hot water) i finally took it upon myself to borrow another set of pliers from my friend and a little can of WD40 (well that was actually for the chain on my new bike, but it can be used for the sink too) and i somehow managed to pry the stupid screw loose enough to get it out. so Wa La!!! our sink is fixed!!! look how pretty!!!

Mike, Happy Birthday!!!! and have a GREAT time tonight!!! wish i was there to partake in the festivities, (but my parents wont let me out of the house) make sure to have a few extra rum and cokes for me ;)

worry no longer, i am alive!!!

katrina swung around thee other night, that bitch!! i totally didn't even know it was coming (sucks not having tv or internet or radio or newspaper, but we're getting internet and tv soon, i hope)

but it was crazy... around 8:30 thursday night, the electricity went out. then we started hearing people out in the hall screaming, so we proceded to go check out what was going on out there... well we're on the 3rd floor of a 3 story building (with mystery stairs going up to the roof, well there was a river flowing down them



and all the water was flowing into their rooms so they were all screaming and sweeping the water down the elevator shaft and out of their rooms



and it was all fun and games, we were having a blast until we realized it was starting to come in our door too :( so we had to plug up our door with towels that we were ringing out like every 5 minutes



so we thought we were safe with the door plugged up and the rain from the porch staying out, but NO... some how on the 3rd floor, water managed to seep in from underneith to the center of our apartment, our hallway that leads to our bedrooms. first we just thought we were tracking water in from outside, but then thee spot started getting bigger and bigger, and wetter and wetter... here's the progression:







and not only did we have a wet hall way that kept getting wetter and wetter, the closet in Rachel's room has the AC unit in it and water was definitly pouring out of it, not just a drip, or even a constant drip, but like a sink faucet pouring water in there.

so from like 9:00 till 3:00 we were riging out our door towels like every 5 minutes, emptying out the bucket in her room, walking through our wet hallway, playing card games and drinking.

but it did look really cool from our balcony. here is the tree right outside



we had to sleep out in the living room by thee balcony to kinda keep cool with a bit of a cool breeze. and then the next morning we went out in search of ice and a car to charge phones. and what happened?? Rachel locked her keys in her car, and no, i didn't take my keys with me. so we were stuck out of our apt, out of our cars, and i still had my phone, but the signal was terrible and the battery was almost dead. good thing the man in the building next to ours knows how to break into cars though ;)

so we got back in, found a guy who's area still had electircity, went over there to charge my phone and get some air conditioning, and flirted our way into getting a set of his keys while he's gone for the week ;) ;) ;) so we've been staying at his house, which is where im typing this from, and we moved all our food over, BUT and it is a BIG BUT! the rug in out apt is still wet, which means it really really stinks, and it's soo soggy and humid in there so it's not going to dry any time soon. electricity isn't supposed to be back to us till tuesday (friday at the latest) and all of our other stuff (clothes and beds) are starting to smell too :( and our DEAD BEAT LANDLORD is away till monday at the earliest and she turned off er voicemail (and no, our sink isn't fixed yet, from the previous post)

but it was soo sad driving around here the past few days... sooo many of my favorite trees and other too have been up rooted. look at the size of this one, and it's gone now :(



and there's just soo much destruction all over, it's such a sad sight... trees down everywhere, all pushed off to the side fo the road to clear the roads :(