god dammit.

So I'm already in a pissy mood. And then my post got erased and there's no restore button. I fucking hate microsoft.

Work kicks my ass today. I have not eaten breakfast, lunch, or dinner, or peed. The cafeteria is now closed, and I have no small bills for the vending machines. Guess I will eat saltines and diet ginger ale for dinner. (not a bad diet, though- I have lost a few pounds already. :| )

Not to mention the fucking disaster drama in my personal life, that is making me lose sleep and have nightmares and feel sick to my stomach. I hate drama, but I seem to be a drama magnet.

I don't know what to do about it. Put up a fight? Roll over and play dead? Do what a normal person would do, say fuck it, cut my losses, and move on? It's eating me up.

And then some bitch in the ER just paged me and gave me attitude b/c she has some million year old guy that has been waiting there for 9 hours. I said "ok we'll see him as soon as we can, but we are SWAMPED." And she got pissy and said 'he's been here 9 hours." yeah that sucks, but I only heard about him 30 seconds ago. Give me a minute...

Sorry. I'm cranky.

But on a good note- I got flirted-with in the OR, I might get to be social this weekend, and the coffee machine at work is working again!

Ok, can't blow off the ER anymore...

later peeps.

-J

Just got a cryptic postit from 'guest'... about Mobius??

Anyone?

I have no clue.

Ok, so I just spent FAR to long working on this... Now to see if it will post.

And can I just say- Photoshop is NOT an intuitive program? All this crap with layers... I couldn't figure out how to do the simplest thing- put a little border/frame around it.

Oh well.

Enjoy... (and give it a second... it should change)

Oh, myspace....

Ok, why can't I get messages like this*:

HELLO GORGIOUS IM FEELING YOU PICS YOU HAVE A NATURAL BEAUTY THAT IS STUNNING YOU SEEM LIKE A SENSUAL,CARING,INTELLEGENT,VERY BEAUTIFUL WOMAN I LOVE MATURE WOMEN THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT HOPEFULLY ILL BE THE ONE WHO GIVE IT TO YOU YOU IS SO IRRESISTABLE I WOULD LIKE TO GET TO KNOW YOU SO WRITE ME BACK SEXY

From guys who 1- can spell, 2- don't go by 'SHADE Shadow Walka' and 3- don't describe themselves with:

"I'm all about dat street music,Dat real talk. I do it wit da hood,I do it 4 da hood.I do it 4 my baby boy,my family. My lil' brother(R.I.P. Jarell Muhammad) "I'll see U when I get there nigga,until then........." My team is hungrier than a group of nymphomaniac's at a sausage party, LET'S GET IT!"

And while on the subject, I wish "CHRIS RIGGS FOR PRESIDENT AT NEUE HOUSE" would stop trying to 'add' me. Have denied him twice today already.

• except- doesn't "mature" really mean "old"?

I hope, someday, the day will come that I can hear this without breaking into tears.

I once knew a girl in the years of my youth
With eyes like the summer: all beauty and truth
But in the morning I fled, left a note and it read:
Someday you will be loved

And I cannot pretend that I felt any regret
'Cause each broken heart will eventually mend
Just as the blood runs red down the needle and thread
Someday you will be loved

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
And the memories of me will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs: like I never occurred
And someday you will be loved

You may feel alone when you're falling asleep
And every time tears roll down your cheeks
But I know your heart belongs to someone you've yet to meet
And someday you will be loved

(

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"Someday you will be loved", Death Cab for Cutie)

PS- How could I forget?!
There's another new mix available for your downloading pleasure... here: or the "my mixes" link over there

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