Paul's Journal

08/21/2011 13:34 #54992

22,000 calories a day
Category: web

Fatass Susanne Eman is trying to become the world's biggest fatass ever. She wants to make it to a ton. What the hell is wrong with her? Imagine the output on this diet.

Breakfast: 6 x eggs scrambled, cooked in butter 468 cals. 1/2 pound bacon 1,168 cals, 4 x potatoes as hash browns 672 cals, 6 x pieces toast with butter 600 cals, 32 ounce cream shake 1,160 cals. Snacking 1 x bag of animal cookies 1,950 cals, 2litre bottle of soft drink 800 cals, 1 x 10.5 ounce bag of barbecue flavour crisps 1,650 cals, 3 x ham and cheese sandwiches 1,576 cals.

Lunch: 3 x beef, bean and green chilli burritos with 1 x cup of sour cream 1,453 cals. Salad (1 head lettuce, 1 cup cherry tomatoes, 1 cup carrots, 1 cucumber, 1/2 cup ranch dressing, bacon bits, 1 cup crumbled cheese, 1 cup chicken 1,479 cals.

Dinner: 12 x filled tacos + 1 x cup sour cream 4,906 cals, 2litre bottle of soda 800 cals, Dessert 8 x scoops vanilla ice cream 2,080 cals, 1 x small pan of brownies 1,200 cals.

Total: 21,962 calories

metalpeter - 08/22/11 18:43
insane what she should do instead is hit the Competitive eating circuit....

tinypliny - 08/21/11 17:53
What is more unbelievable is she has "fans" (read: psychotic crazies fueling this irresponsible behaviour)

libertad - 08/21/11 17:08
So basically she is going to kill herself before her children reach adulthood to try and prove that it is OK to be morbidly obese. That is so crazy.

08/21/2011 13:02 #54991

Swimming at Windmill Point Rock Quarry
Category: swimming

Yesterday (e:terry), (e:matthew) and I went swimming at the quarry again. This time we spent a lot of time in the middle with goggles. There us some crazy stuff down three including a pirate ship with mast and skeletons, a bathtub and a large recreational boat. It was fun trying to swim down far enough to touch it. Next weekend I am bringing nose plugs.

08/21/2011 12:58 #54990

Chicken Hips at ETS
Category: food

After discussing chicken wings last night (e:Mike) and I headed over to ETS. We ordered mild wings and 20 minutes later hot ones came out. I hate spicy food but considering how long it takes we decided to eat them anyways. There was one really strange shaped super large one in the middle.

metalpeter - 08/22/11 18:40
ETS has wings Had no idea...... On a side note not sure if this is true anymore but when I was young mild, Medium, and hot no such thing as suicidal well maybe they where around varied by place so yes one places mild was another's medium..... I guessing the Taco place messed up the wings though......

08/21/2011 01:27 #54987

bird-bird
Category: pets

She loves sitting on me outside. Except today she was on my shoulder while I was grilling and she decided that was the time to practice flying.

metalpeter - 08/22/11 18:36
I admit didn't follow the link but what keeps it say from flying away..... Also not that anyone wants the bird to land on the grill but if it did would the tortoise eat it or would it only eat live birds?

matthew - 08/21/11 11:07
Nymphicus hollandicus
:::link:::

paul - 08/21/11 11:07
:::link:::

paul - 08/21/11 11:05
They don't even look sort of alike. This is not a cockatoo. It is a lesser bird known as a cockatiel and it was captive bread.

tinypliny - 08/21/11 10:32
Is that a citron-crested critically endangered cockatoo?! :::link:::

tinypliny - 08/21/11 10:28
What kind of a cockatoo is he? :::link:::

08/20/2011 16:05 #54985

Ant Tragedy
Category: bugs

Sorry guys but I was so tired of you nesting by my kitchen and sitting around my sink. It was time to deal with it before we had to involve spray.

I know (e:tinypliny) pretends that I should live and let live. But I know its because she thinks I didn't see that bottle of borax in your shoe closet.

Its official, I am totally turning into my father.

metalpeter - 08/22/11 18:32
I have heard of Chocolate covered ants but never had them how does one do that? that would make a great blog..... First of all how do you catch them? and do you cook them alive in hot melted chocolate or do you cook them 1st?

libertad - 08/21/11 17:11
I wanted to instead I just watched, I guess that means I am going to insect hell.

tinypliny - 08/21/11 10:17
You wanted to save the fruit flies drowning in apple cider vinegar?? You are going to insect heaven.

libertad - 08/20/11 21:20
I feel guilty killing insects. When I saved the tick I found on me I felt so bad watching it slowly die in plastic container on my fridge.

My house was so disgusting the last two days that I had fruit flies all over. So after cleaning everything I put two small saucers with apple cider vinegar out and covered them in saran wrap and then punched holes in the plastic. This works so well at capturing fruit flies. I also felt bad cause I watched as they were drowning and I sort of wanted to save them.

paul - 08/20/11 18:19
That would make me insane.

tinypliny - 08/20/11 17:11
And btw, I don't think I support the live and let live policy. I just don't like pouring stuff over ants because I think the rest of them will attack me in my sleep. In my case. there is a HUGE anthill right outside the building downstairs and they are all red ants. When they bite, they leave their heads in my skin and they usually don't bite unless I harass them and try to kill. I think a massive army live between the floorboards in my flat and I obsessively clean the floor because of them.

tinypliny - 08/20/11 16:13
OHHHHH! I see.

LOL

tinypliny - 08/20/11 16:11
Bottle of borax in my shoe closet?! You mean the bright orange canister of tide laundry detergent?