Here is the ranking Republican on the Intelligence comitee saying something so profoundly silly he would be purged if this was Soviet Russia.



My brain hurts...

But America has bigger problems!

A spider was bit by a radioactive human and is now attacking the Space Shuttle Atlantis!



Will Gamera save us in time?

God!

I am so bored of these sex scandals. So a Washington state house rep. with a huge conservative, anti-gay record named Richard Curtis got mixed up with the wrong 26 year old boy.

Cody Castanga, a porn ac-tor, met Curtis at a porn shop. They then went to a hotel where Castanga banged Curtis' man-punnanny. After he demanded $1k from Curtis to keep their tryst a secret. Hey, a boy has to eat!

So what does Curtis do? He files an extortion charge against Castanga. Which is good. Nobody should be extorted. However, denying you had sex is kind of silly when you are on survalence tape walking in and out of the hotel where you just had sex with the man!

He resigned from his office on Halloween of this year.

Look, gentlemen, we are having way too much of this! I am getting tired of journaling about you kooky men every other week when the world discovers you have an appetite for another man's ass. So I am going to do you a favor. Here are

James' tips for not being caught in a gay sex scandal

1) If you have a wife and kids, leave them. Pay child support and alimony. No child should discover that daddy is gay after a public restroom sting.

2) Are you crazily anti-gay? Well knock it off. Barney Frank is still around for a reason.

3) Come on, admit it. I am not saying you have to pop on out of the closet. But when the police catch you with a dick in your mouth, don't say you were just unsure how to perform mouth to mouth resuscitation.

4) By nice to the people you fellate. You don't want them writing about your poor sexual performance 30 years after the fact (I am looking at you Mr. Craig!)

5) Pay for it yourself. Don't make the city, or state pay your bath house bill. I am all for you getting off, but a $100 hand job better come out of your well lined pockets.

pay heed to my words gentlemen and your careers may last just flicker on a few second longer than your spooge coated super-nova.

Howdy,

How do you like to spend Christmas? With tinsel and trees and good cheer?

Or do you wake up at half passed whiskey and shave just a little too close around your throat?

If you are among the former. Then there ain't nothin' under the stars of heaven that can help you.

If you are among the latter. Then let Tom Waits and Peter Murphy croon their way into your vermiculited hearts.

I'll talk to you once I drown myself in bathtub gin.

::DOWNLOAD SOUND::

With the first caucus less than a month away, a huge upset with Mike Huckabee beating the shit out of Romney in the polls, and Obama in a statistical dead heat with Clinton in Iowa and South Carolina (Thanks Oprah!) I am really tweeking, man!

But there is one thing about this primary season that has me groovin' and that is Mike Gravel. Oh! To be sure he is an irrelevant crank who would make a superb commune secretary, or the best boss you ever had, but presidential material he is not.

Please, check out this campaign video. You will be glad you did. The thing about it is that I am not sure if it is official or not. He ads have been all bizzare.

Here it is kidos



tell me that doesn't make you want to smoke and watch Schoolhouse Rock?

We have a few illustrious estrippers in San Francisco, but I thought I would beat them to their local news stories.




Yup, it generates more than enough energy it needs to keep itself illuminated, about a day's worth of electricity for a family of four.

Soon, we can smile in the knowledge that the chubby mug of Paul Walier divorce attorney is green, green, green.