Seems like it's about time for another "E" [inlink]twisted,194[/inlink] installment.

(e:Paul) thinks I should "write the book" on craigslist, since he's been privvy to the odd detail here and there. I'm not qualified for that by a longshot. It's only because I've been out of circulation so long and am jumping into the online casual dating thing at a point where 1) I already have a first-hand historical, perspective on "old-school" dating and, 2) I now find myself living smack-dab in the epicenter of the craigslist-style hook-up scene, that any of this is even noteworthy. To me at least. But what the hell. As (e:Paul)'s flyers say, spotlight your life. Even Thoreau knew that.

Ok, so where was I? Right. So last night I issued my first-ever booty-SMS (as (e:Paul) put it). Oh, I may have skipped a few chapters in the "E" story, but I'm sure you can fill those in. Anyways, I really didn't have high hopes because it was very last-minute and in typical twisted fashion I had downplayed and back-handed the invitation to the point where you'd only pick up on it if you wanted to and if you didn't want to no response was necessary. So anyway, lo and behold he shows up where I am at 11pm, we greet, catch-up and order beers before the rest of the entourage starts to arrive (he rarely travels without one).

So I quickly notice one member of the entourage, an attractive brunette who I've never met before, seems to be with him. At least, she still thinks she is at this point. I'm definitely reading in meaning where I have no idea what's really going on because I didn't line up to get introduced. And I know why I didn't but I don't know why I feel like that. Oh well, I guess I still have some acclimating to do.

Anyway, so much for this installment.

(e:jason) - I think you hit the nail [inlink]jason,143[/inlink] on the head about requirements and restraints. Very insightful.

p.s. - this may have be my new theme song:

Had lunch with my neighbor today. We ran into each other at Burger King (no comment) a few months ago and decided we should make a monthly date of it. We picked 1st Wednesday of the month, but I forgot to call her to confirm this past Tuesday so she thought I forgot about her or was too busy with work. I thought we'd done this enough times I didn't need to confirm. I felt badly - partly because then I had to find my own lunch. Anyway, we had our make-up date today.

She is the cutest little 82-year-old you'd ever want to meet. And she always picks the healthiest thing on the menu and somehow I always seem to pick the least healthy thing. Don't get me wrong, I love healthy food. But apparently I also love unhealthy food. I think it was totally random, but the Centers for Disease Control once called me for a phone survey and the questions were all about how often/recently I had practiced unsafe gastronomy and let me tell you apparently it's lucky I'm still alive.

So she had the vegetable omelette (using Egg Beaters), substituting fresh fruit as the side instead of home fries. I had the eggs benedict (it's not my fault you can't poach Egg Beaters), also choosing the fresh fruit as a nominal nod to health consciousness - or giving in to peer pressure, I'm not sure. I sure was sorry I didn't have those home fries to sop up all the artery-clogging hollandaise later though. The really weird thing is I already had 2 eggs for b'fast. So after four eggs what's a little hollandaise sauce?

Oh - the home of the whopper is not now serving eggs benedict. We decided to go crazy and branch out by going to the local diner where Eunice had a 2-for-1 breakfast special coupon. Which is why we had breakfast for lunch.

I really don't know why I'm posting this. Later.

Welcome "back" (e:Jason).

(e:Paul) and (e:Mike), I'm so sorry for your loss. One of my first impressions of (e:strip) (before I knew anybody here) was from (e:Terry) and (e:Matthew)'s journals about canning tomatoes with your Nonna. That slice of life struck home and sucked me right in. Even though I never met your grandmother, I feel like I know what she what was like from the stories and pictures and even hearing her voice. And seeing how much you love her.

I know how hard it to lose someone who is still full of life. It's much harder for those left behind. But for someone as independent as your grandmother, I can't help thinking how fortunate she was to live such a long, incredible life right up to the end.

It seems weird to be writing this publicly, but since I really only know you and your grandmother through the site maybe it makes sense. Anyway, thanks for sharing your Nonna with (e:strip). It's a privilege to know her.

Hey, (e:Jasonsback), no you didn't come across as dismissive [inlink]jason,134[/inlink] it was just me being overly defensive. sorry.

Of course you would be welcome in San Fran any time. As long as you promise to look me up while you're here. I'm an excellent tour guide.

Ok, afterthoughts. You are absolutely right about banks being "more than willing to give people these huge mortgages." I am living proof of that, having bought my house here and refinanced two years later (30-year fixed both times) with absolutely no documentable income. Ha! I should have bought that 3-family for sure.

Anyway, I also wanted to say my post (below) should NOT be used for financial planning purposes. It's all philosophical crap with my own real life examples thrown in. I'm the last (e:peep) anybody should look to for financial advice, even though I did learn some good lessons the hard way. Oh, maybe just one tiny piece of financial advice about the mortgage interest tax write-off. That only works if you have an income to write the mortgage interest off your taxes against. So paying mortgage interest, not making any income, and taking a business loss all in the same year = very bad idea.

Ok, well I think I really am done here. And I am so sick of typing these days I'm going to take a vacation from recreational blogging and try to cultivate some friends I might get to talk to in person some day. So the N. Cali contingent will quietly slide into the Pacific now and the rest of the country can heave a sigh of relief and go about your business. Nice knowing you.

Before I get into this, no place on earth is so sweet that you should give up at least half your income just to have a roof over your head.

[inlink]jason,132[/inlink]

Well that's a matter of opinion, since money is meaningless except for what it can get you. (Unless you're into money purely as security, that is.) Only you can decide what you want to spend it on, though. I don't see it as such an absolute. For instance, would it be worth it to you to cut whatever you spend on housing now in half by moving to South Dakota?

Anyway, the smartest financial move I ever made was to buy my first house (a two-family for $144k in Medford MA) which seemed like a huge stretch at the time. I got a first-time buyer loan where I only had to put 5% down and could add 75% of the projected income from the rental unit to my actual income to qualify. That scared the b'jesus out of me. But I quickly rented the downstairs apartment to the bonny Sullivan brothers and even carried them for more months than I care to admit when they ran into financial trouble. And the tax break I got on mortgage interest brought my actual housing costs down close to what I had been throwing away in rent. Instead of throwing money away that house turned into the best savings plan I could have picked.

The (second) dumbest financial move I ever made (let's not get into the first dumbest) was to NOT go through with buying the 3-unit Victorian on Haight Street when my offer was accepted the same day I got laid off a mere seven months after transferring to San Francisco. I played it safe and invested my real estate nest egg in the more conservative option - my little California bungalow here on the island hideaway of Alameda.

I guess I could have been even dumber and not bought into the market then at all, given all the uncertainties. Really played it seemingly "safe" and continued to subsist in the rent-controlled flat I shared with two other roommates. You can live pretty cheaply if you can get into a rent controlled apartment where at least one tenant has been on the lease a long time. I was paying $503/month to share a 2-bedroom 2-bath full floor Victorian flat with two fireplaces, double parlour (the master tenant's suite), living room, kitchen and sun porch with two other roommates. I was the only one with a "real" job. Until I got laid off, that is. Move to California, become a degenerate. ;-)

Wait a minute, this isn't the story I wanted to tell! Where was I? Oh yeah.

So there are a whole lot of factors involved in the cost of living comparison, many you have no control over (property taxes, for instance). It doesn't pay to get hung up on whether the things you can't change are right or wrong. It is what it is, just factor it into the equation and decide if the resulting scenario is worth it to you or not. Trying to nickel and dime every piece of the equation as if you could plug them in somewhere else might be interesting but in the end we only get to live in the real world, unfair as it might be. I learned that the hard way.

What can I say, I'm really not trying to talk anybody into anything. I just know I spent way too much of my life deliberating over things that in the end were not important. I'm also old enough to really know my time is limited. And for me, waking up every morning in a place where the weather is typically a joy not a battle, I have 450 miles of Bay trail and the Pacific ocean in my back yard, a city that is an international tourist destination across the Bay, local fresh produce year-round, cultural diversity, great housing stock, liberal, creative, individualistic friends and neighbors - that to me, as the credit card commercial puts it, is priceless. But that's just me.


View of the city, the ocean, the wilderness from Marin Headlands approximately 35 minutes from my house.

Too bad I'm not a better photographer. Maybe (e:Matthew) can come out and take some pix that will do the area justice. I'm officially retiring as Bay Area promoter.