tonight that stupid man at the copshop on Lex and Elm wouldn't sell me beer in the bottle. He said it wouldn't fit through his hole, it was ridiculous. I bet the cops get beer in the bottle if they want it. What if I wanted donuts in the bottle, would that have fitted through? Stupid asshole. I bequeath you a scathing curse of achy ass. I hope that every time you need to use that ass of yours that it just aches and aches. So there. I even danced a little shaman dance. You achy-assed muthafucka!

the word is paradise!!

That's right, paradise. It comes from two Persian words, pairii (around), and idaeza (a wall), according to Dalrymple:

"The word was brought west by Xenophon, who introduced it into Greek when describing the fabulous garden built by the Persian Emperor Cyrus at Sardis; from the Greek paradeisoi it passed into Latin as paradisum; and hence into Middle English as paradis."

Funny that our vision of Heaven actually derives from an enclosed Persian pleasure garden. Paradise means enclosed by walls, which is not really to my liking. Perhaps that is the reason I don't want to go to heaven. Sounds so boring. God's watching you all the time. Everything's all ordered and good and right. Don't you see? It's all balance. Perfect white is no place to live a life. And you can't see in pitch dark. That's why the blend is so important. A little good, a little bad, a pinch of order, and a handful of chaos. Why strive for perfection when you can strive for life.Live to Learn. Learn to Love, and Love to Live (and all the other permutations).

Hey! Sometimes, you need your cheesy Zen entries. No?

The car needs a steady supply of quarters in order to function. It makes a syrupy cough sound that lets you know to pop another in. There was more to this dream but...

The Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE) will monitor the American presidential elections iin November . Think it'll make a difference? Will the people who elected George in the first place (the 9 in black) give a darn what the international org. thinks when it decides the race this time?

I wish I had a video of my gandma dancing.

Keith, I'm doing the naked picture thing too.

what more can a boy ask for?

Today we went for a trip to devil's hole in Niagara Falls. Paul's like, I know where it is, no problem... Paul sat in the back with Matt. I was shotgun, with (e:lilho) driving. We get to the first questionable part...which way Paul?...Paul...PAUL...bPAUL...oh ummm...left.... The choice has unfortunately been made. And it was wrong, and the situation would repeat...4 or 5 times. We went to Niagara Falls...we went to the love canal...everywhere but devil's friggin' hole. Three hours later, we've spent 15 minutes outside of the car. Very fun. I guess the moral is: don't pretend to be no naviga-TOR if you ain't no naviga-tah. WTF?

I am publicly apologizing for the two errors made last night while judgement was somewhere left behind:

To (e:diana): My comments last night were purely jocular in nature. There was no harm intended. My humor gets dumber as the night goes on, and the quips leave my mouth without traversing the terrain of my mind. Though I still think that if you're gonna call me T-bag, I can call you D-licious or Di-uretic, but I won't again.

To becka, sorry for confusing you for Nicole. It's just that just about everytime I see you you're together...lame excuse, but yeah...