hanging on here until i'm gone
right where i belong, just hanging on
even though i pass the time alone,
somewhere so unknown, it heals the soul

you ask for walls, i'll build them higher
we'll lie in shadows of them all

february stars,
floating in the dark
temporary scars
february stars

ok so i have nothing to say but i couldn't keep the sadness as my last entry. soooo here is an update! now time for bed!

So sometimes I am really, really sad. And maybe the night makes it worse, and it changes from day to day...but that not much...every night sort of ends up the same. Uuugghhh....I just get sooooooooo sad and I don't know how to change it. and I have so many great things around me but something is missing and I hate it. Ahhh... =0(

so here is a person and a picture who always makes me smile...

i love big lindsay kramer

and another picture just cuz i like it and i love brian


don't be offended if your picture isn't here, you know if i love you.

EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS = Cinnamon London
(Favorite Spice + Favorite Foreign Vacation Spot)

SOCIALITE ALIAS = Doodles Fredonia
(Silliest Childhood Nickname + Town Where You First Partied)

"FLY GIRL" ALIAS (a la J.Lo) = M. Mal ...wow thats stupid
(First Initial + First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name)

DIVA ALIAS = Skittles Pepsi
(Something Sweet Within Sight + Any Liquid in Kitchen)

GIRL DETECTIVE ALIAS = Penguin Fredonia
(Favorite Baby Animal + Where You Last Went to School)

BARFLY ALIAS = Popcorn Spotsicle
(Last Snack Food You Ate + Your Favorite Drink)

SOAP OPERA ALIAS = Kathleen Lincoln
(Middle Name + Street You Live On)

PORN STAR ALIAS = Liberty Lincoln
(First Pet's Name + Street You Grew Up On)

ROCK STAR ALIAS = Goldschlager Rock
(Any Liquid on the Bar + Last Name of Bad-Ass Celebrity

From an e-mail I got...a cute "awww" thing...but these are all true things, and for some reason, really mean something to me tonight.

1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die
for you.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.

4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.

5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

6. You mean the world to someone.

7. If not for you, someone may not be living.

8. Someone that you don't even know exists, loves you.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world.

11. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want, you probably won't get it...but keep believing in yourself, and I bet that, sooner or later, you will get it.

12. Always remember the compliments you received. Throw away the rude remarks.

13. Always tell someone how you feel about them; you'll feel much better when they know.

14. If you have a great friend, take the time to let them know that they are great.

haha. I hope I'm not known as the elmwoodstrip.com loser who puts up sappy away messages. =0) Although I suppose I have fit that category quite well..

By the way, Mike, we need to do some shopping down South asap...you raised an excellent point!