i have to make a decision in the next hour of whether or not to resign statistics.

the good news is that it will not take me down to p/t status, and my financial aid will not be affected.

i will just feel like i've failed and let myself down. i've really tried, and it gets me so frustrated, because i just suck at math.

why did i think i had a future in speech? i'm taking (e:tina)'s advice and pursuing design. i think i will be much happier actually taking courses that interest me, and not trying to conform because i know speech would be a good career. some friends have told me that if im good at what i do, the money will follow, and i think they are right.

this doesn't mean i don't want to take and sort of speech classes, because i'm very interested in sign language, but all of the math and science will overwhelm me, as it already has.

lesson to all: don't try and be something your are not.

• and in fashion news, i will be recieving my new monster cutie boots in just a few days!*

i have no time for fun, or sleep. i have 60 hr work weeks coming up, in addition to so much school work, and everything else.

i kinda feel like im gonna collapse. but at least i get to see my sis soon. hopefully she isn't sick of me by now.

one of the least favoriie days of my life.

i have million things to bring home. including this wooden art easel, and a tray of muffins. (don't ask.)

i have done no school work, because i can only concetrate in my apartment, and im a lazy ass.

i have gotten used to seeing mommy and will miss her so, and well as sister, but i see her again very soon.

i just feel like this trip was a high point, and things can't continue to go so well.

shit will hit the fan. maybe literally.

i havent had much contact with th outside world, and have been drunk for basically five days consecutively, and i feel like im gonna be a huge bitch when i get back to b-lo. but, i have gifts for my homeboys and girls, so ya'll better represent.

this bitch don't come but once in a lifetime, so appreciate.

peace...


drunk? i think so.

in vegas, we stayed at the newest, most luxurious hotel ever. probably will be the nicest hotel of my life. flat screen tvs, one in the bathroom, curtains that open with the touch of a button. a window the size of the wall. amazing beds, and sheets.

what else. oh yeah. the gala last night was basically like being the golden globes. everyone had an ice sculpture at their table. top shelf liquor pouring out like water. glitter falling from the celing. elvis, dancers, singers, band.

I've never seen anything like it, and ill post the pics when i can. it was insane.

but after all that insanity, it is nice to be with my mommy, in her house. thats right, now im in az. third leg of my three city tour. im contemplating never drinking again, due to the massive hangover, and about 6 lbs gained thus far on the trip.

anyway, last night, we were heading upstairs to call it a night, and, i was of course decked out in a tiara(they were gving them out at the party), and some guy asks if im getting married. what? i was confused, and luaghed and said no, that i was at an event, where they gave me the tiara. he then proceded to invite to his room, and said that we could just "hold eachother". while some snuggles would have been very nice, and needed, i declined, and went to bed.

the best part was everyone on the elevator was drunk, and laughing, and encouraging me to go with him. i guess its just the insanity that only vegas can bring.

when i arrive home, the simplicicty of buffalo will be a nice return to reality. :O)