Mike,


I am so up for some dodgeball madness, tshirts and all! :O)

i am bad at giving my entries titles, so, well, that is all i have to say about that.

calling taiwan is really confusing. either tina gavce me the wrong number, or her line is always busy. this is bad. this may sound strange, but, whenever i am upset, i want to talk to tina. it isn't that other people don't listen or care; there is something about just hearing her voice that makes me feel better. i feel so comfortable around her, that i feel ok just letting it all out. she doesn't think im being silly or over emotional, she just listens and gives me her advice. she is just amazing. she always has just the right thing to say. she never judges. she always listens. and afterwords, i feel soooo much better. god, if you exist, thank you for her. she is a little slice of heaven. my slice of heaven is gone for the summer, and i don't know how to call her. help!

i feel like a jerk, i have ignored most of my friends, and even family these past few weeks. it is really hard for me to deal with things with so many people around. i get really irriatated and cranky, and i always react with a good long cry. i will just say this, no matter how much i say i want things to change, it is so hard, the hardest part of life is change, and i am really scared. i feel like i am being forced into complete independence, and i don't like it. i don't like the confusion of having so many people around when i am trying to gather my thoughts. i have not packed, and i need to.

goodbye childhood. hello adult-life.

p.s. paul matthew and terry... i miss you. you make-a-me smile! i will come visit soon!

my aunt has not cleaned out my room or gotten rid of that cat. the cat will kill me befoe i kill it. anybody want a cat? its a pretty one.i shall live in a box and accept donations.

nobody is returning my phone calls, and this makes me want to go far away. arizona perhaps? i need some happy pills. as my mother says, "there just isn't enough prozac in the water."

big sisters make it all better.

i was in the car with my mom today, and she grabbed my hand and started to cry. i've never see her cry; she is such a strong woman. i'm sad. i hate crying. im happy for her though; she is finally getting the life she deserves to have.

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." -Buddha

I am going to just let this happen, and go with it. Crying is not a sign of weakness, it's just a part of being human right?

im am so bad at being organized... i need a personal assistant. so far, 90% of the packing has been done by my aunts, they are the best. i have so much more to do, and i don't want to do it.
i keep getting all teary eyed, and this is just the start. ah well, at least i get to take a fun trip to ny next week, yay!

i keep getting these emails from this man who says i am next of kin to someone with the same last name as i, "Ho". he says that i stand to inherit 50% of his 20 million. this has been going on for about a monh and a half now, should i respond? this is very strange.

i found my liscense.
i got an oil change.
i got a rearview mirror.

these are the best days of our lives.