So i saw the best apartment on Saturday. The catch they wanted someone to move in right away. Something I can't afford to do. I can't pay rent on two places at once. I am so super bummed. Tom told me he'd help me out so I called the person renting the place and it was gone (i knew it would be). Sigh- it was so cute. I guess it wasnt meant to be. I hate apartment hunting. I really super duper wanted that place too. Its going to take time to get over this. You know a piece of fine jewelry from Tiffanys would heal this heartache...

Until my birthday! Yea! I'm still holding out hope that the birthday fairy will know my deepest desire and show up with an ipod.

Can I change my user name? I feel kinda jipped. I didn't even get to choose it. Paul used our friendship as a ploy to just sign me up w/o my consent. Its like friendship terrorism.

Has anyone seen that "dude" study?
It says that guys call women "dude" if they are close with her but not intimate. I have a ton of guy friends that use that term w me. Great. I am so ready to be done with the singles scene it sucks.

I don't know why I get so excited about going to these places. Every single time its never as exciting as you think its going to be. It was crowded with business type men and Midwestern tourists. Yuck! I suppose its one of those things you have to do once just for the experience. Drinks were 10-15 each ouch! Thank goodness I wasn't buying. I'm more of a Irish pub local dive kinda girl (at least that's what my pocket pook says I am- actually my pocket books says I'm more of a 40 of OE on the corner kinda girl).

Tonight I get to go to Tao. Fancy schmancy. If Ive sold my soul to the devil (as Paul claims I did) then I may as well play the fiddle on my way down.

My other alternative plan for this evening was trudging down to 34th to get a ride home from Tom and have one drink on the way. Are you fucking kidding me? He expects me to walk through this miserable weather so I can see him for 45 minutes tops? He would then consider his duties done for the week and not have to see me again for a few weeks. He is such an ass. I've started to lay down the law with him and I can tell he doesn't like it. I told him for my birthday if he wants to see me I want a suite at a nice hotel, champagne and strawberries, presents and steak for dinner. Otherwise I don't want to see him. Now this may seem extreme, keep in mind he has yet to get me anything for any holiday ever. He considers all the times he takes me out "gifts"- that would work except he charges it to his expense account at work. Nice try. I'm sorry but when you are a 34 yr old trying to date a 26 yr old you gotta bring something to the table. Ugh- why can't i just find a guy who doesn't suck?