The original Nintendo has dawned itself upon me a couple days ago, so I have been playing ALL THREE super marion bros. games (3 being my favorite). The racoon tail and the flying, the whistles, the cannon ships. Just brings back so much good memories. If only I had a partner to play with hmmmmm? Of course I forgot about the blinking screen that comes up as soon as you turn on the game. And the blowing of the cartridges. Frustrating but well worth it. I still hate kids, and I never plan to have any EVER! Question: can you miss somebody so much that it makes you want to change your world? Your dreams and day dreams say different things but has the same message. It gets really frustrating. You think you did the right thing but your heart still tugs in the other direction. Just as it did when you were over there. It makes no sense i know, damn this heart of mine for having feeling. It's valentines day and I am not lookling for love. Too much snow for that bullshit. Although I was going through and old black notebook I had in college and on this day four years ago I had wrote a poem. It was very sappy and very sad I found myself hung up on some boy, who I don't like and has anal warts now. I think Valentines day is a holiday not only for hallmark but for women. They seem to be more into it then men do. Happy Vagina day ladies and I hope for all of you who have valentines that they take care of your vagina very well today.

Thursday and Friday, good times and good times....I think? Thursday I went out with my friend Sara to Iggy's a karaoke bar on the east side. This was my second time going and it was more crowded and I got more drunk this time.The bartendres went around puring shouts In people's mouths and there was tequila (yuck), vodka (yum), and PBR! A boy from Ohio slipped me tounge because I found his lighter, followed me outside whenever I went and then I saww him going to the bathrrom with this girl he was making out with ( EVERY FUCKIN TIME!). Slept for about 3 hours on an air matress with a boy named Dan. Friday came fast and it was my friends Nikki's birthday so it was party time. I called (e:terry) before I got drunk that night but hen it went crazy after that. Pissing on Madison ave and then to the rented out room we had which also featured karaoke! Lots of bad singing that night, not from me ofcourse but from the other males at the party. You know you're drunk when, you are getting hit on by a gay guy and not realizing it untill he leaves. I missed the obvious signs such as: the constant arm around my shoulders or waist each time there was a picture taken or I sang a song, anouncing he was gay over the mic, and singing off my mic every group song getting his face and lips oddly close to mine. His name? Hell I don't know. To another bar that night which involved more drinking and a looooooong conversation with this straight boy named, shit don't that one either. Back to nikkis sleepy time awakend by rude cable guy, and then throbbing headache which Colin helped with asprin as soon as I awaked. I go home and sleep for 14 hours. Much needed. Well that about sums it up my next party weekend wont come for a while now. I gotta save up some dough to visit my fav (e:peeps). Baby's callin gotta go.

My cell phone is still being bad so If any of my friends were trying to call me don't bother right it's being very very bad. I might have to get a new one. I was thinking T-Mobile according to Mrs. catherine they are the most trusted in the country. Things that make you go Hmmmmm?

Yeeeeaah so four full days of walking around newyork looking for jobs did some real damage to my precious body. My long and very lovely, dancer leggs are so stiff it has alterd my distnct and sexy walk. NOT HOT. My right knee has been sore for the past three days and I have never had knee problems. Oh please don't let this pain be in vain. Evey bar I go to has something way different about it and thats always fun. Last night as I was asking a store clerk directions to the nearest pizza place I noticed that his right was holding his erect dick and he was in mid-spoodge ( i hope thats the way you spell it). And what killed me is that the person who was buying things from him didn't seem to notice. The clerk wasn't old but he was ugly. still I think thats something that should be saved for home or if you really can't wait, maybe closing the store and running to the bathroom out of public sight. Just a thought. Gotta love New York for surprising you everyday. I'm not starving and I have a warm place to sleep every night so I'm o.k. It's funny because I can't listen to certain songs because it's makes me think about the people I miss back home and how happy i was with them everyday. My uncle died of a heart attack a couple days ago. So this week it's back to the drawing board or the streets of new york. wish me fuck.

There has been an on going debate in my head wather or not I really want to stay in new york. Nothing seems to be going right for me here thus far and I'm I think I lost weight. My cell phone is broken so I had to send it to the company to fix so Im phoneless. Whichdosen't seem to matter since none of my friends return my phone calls and there has been no jobs calling me back. I am doing the un-thinkable right now. I'm BABYSITTING a baby! But he makes my rent cheaper so you know, ones gotta do. I babysit little Cory twice a week and it makes my rent $240.00 a month and he's cute and fat. LAst week was declared the worst week of my life, I was deathly ill, my phone broke and I didn't eat for three days. Although I seem to no be having much fun here yet, moving back to buffalo seems like a bad idea, I mean yeah iI would be with my close friends ( who don't return my phones calls) but I would have to go bakc to that P place and I'm not sure I've hit that low yet. Another up note I did meet Mike Myers (Austin Powers, Waynes World) that was cool I am a fan of his. Anywho gotta go baby calls. Bye Bye B-lo.