whats been going on with me lately. hmmmmm. Well My weeks seem to be just flying by, I have been spending an exburate amount of time in the house, on the couch if I am not working. Going out less, working more, sleeping more, screwing less (ha ha). Old bossy boy has a new GIRLFRIEND now (flacid earthworm guy, refer to "emergency" journal). She's nice, pretty, too bad she dosen't know about his little problem right? Noooooo thats cruel. I think he is actually fucking with my job too. It's amazing the lengths someone would go to get a little attention. Anywho he's leaped. Brotha on the other hand has just bought himself a house in amherst, so I will be popping in for a visit there frequently. *kiss kiss* I have decided to join bikram yoga in the begining of october. I haven't done yoga in about two months. And I have been drinking a lot of labatt blue the past couple days. Motha, brotha, uncle are all still in jail. GOt a new pair of pants (girls pants); they are gray and pin striped, very very sexy pair of pants. Oh and I got a hat to match. I am actually thinking aout wearing it to trisha's wedding reception. hmmmmm. I went out lastnight and did my "make a man happy" dance, and uncloseted some boys. *hee hee* So in a nutshell I am doing fine. I'm keeping it real and keeping them humpin. muah baby.

Ther has been a whole lot of attention surrounding panos this past week. Artvoice no longer gives them news paper after bashing them in an article last week. But now pano is pissing more people off; the public. Not the majority, but a select few who loves the history of this city,; and those who are just told to hate them. This morning while I was working, I over heard a conversation between two employees, stating that there will be protesters today outside panos. Protesting against Panos. I diidn't know why at first but now I do. It involves his expansion plan, which will include tearing down the house next door, to make more room in the restaraunt, and a bigger parking lot. When word got around, It drew ALOT of negative attention towards panos. It comes to find out that the house next door to panos is very important to the citizens and to the city. I am not too sure of what that is though.So what started out as four 13 year old kids, standing out front telling people not to go to panos "because he is tearing down that building". Ended in a block full of people with picket signs, shouting things such as "shame on you pano" and "don't tear it down!". Menwhile we are working as usual, in fact it was a VERY busy day. The protest lasted about an hour or so, and then once channel 4 news left, it was back to normal for about 15 minuets. And then the phone started ringing off the hook, It was still busy and another news team came. There were some kids outside protesting the protesters. They had signs such as "greeks are people too", " I have no place to park" (I don't think this boy drives) and "don't COCK block panos". hee hee. And since we are on the subject of panos, let me just tell you, i feel a war coming on. Somebody in there is about to get custed the fuck out!

Starting yestereday, I have claimed this week for me, "my down week" . Not because i am upset and feeling bad, quite the contrary i feel really good. I say "my down week" because I am going to spend WAY less money, by not going out to ANY bars. This way I can go shopping this weekend. i went out friday and saturday night, had a blast friday, and notso much as a spark saturday. I went to trisha's party and we painted downtown, and allen red. Eveyone who was there, were fabulous and we were all lookin good. BOO YAH! Saturday night I weent to the underground again, and was not thoroughly entertained by the "performers". But I will sound like a bitch if I talk about it even more. i will mention one thing, I do not find ANYTHING sexy about a topless man with tight pants walking back and fourth, LIP SINGING..... SEAL - "KISSED BY A ROSE" If you want to entertain me you better bust out in song, and really sing that fucker. Dont lip sing anyhting that can be sung just as easily. It takes away from the feel when we can just see the boredom on your face as you lip sing a song and try to take it seriously, the whole three minutes and thirty seconds, which feels like three hours to you feels that way to me too. But hey some people like it, he even has fans. Obviously people who are closed minded and entertained too easily. Any body can do that. And I wont even get on some of the drag acts there we've all seen bad ones. nuf said about that. i am going to panos today and pick up my cd walkman which my boss has chosen to kidnap. So I am going to show up to his mutha fuckin job and blow that bitch up if he refuses again damnit. I'll go in there like "can I speak to *&%# please?" And ask him nicely for it, and let me tell you if I don't get it, there's gonna be some smoke in the city. Nah I'm joking. I do need my cd walkman to run my errands tomorrow that I have been putting off too long. But I am still not going to La Luna though. i didn't go last week and he had the nerve to question me sayin "where wre yoyu lasnight?" I said "home" which was the truth. and then he saw me out Friday night when I was with trisha and the rest of the e peeps. Then the next day comes to me at work sayin "you looked really good lastnight". I said "yeah........it was a long night". And left it at that. I don't feel bad becausses he sould of known better. You pass this up once for some bullshit and I'm gone. Anywho thats all for now, pray for me so I don't get sucked into a bar untill saturday. peace and love. and look out the buffalo news are onto us.

I woke up this morning feeling good and walked out the house lookin good. I got paid and I had the whole beautiful day a head of me. I felt good because i told my boss that Iwould not work today from four to eleven. and then he schedules me next week for that time, aint that a bitch. I know what satine from the moulin rouge when she says "there may come a time when a heart felt employer thinks your awful nice, but get that ice or else no dice." But you know those are the webs we weave. Anywho another reason i was really happy today walking down the beautiful elmwoods strip, is that there were no KIDS! All those fukers were in school; and every place I went was in and out. I am now getting ready to go to trisha's party, against my wishes though I will not be jumpoing out of the cake as orginally planned, but thats alright. I still have the wedding reception to do that *wink wink*. Thats all for now ta ta loves and keep it real funky!

fuck what chu heard; Men are the SAME! I am saying this because I am drunk and I am pisse off! I am listening to Tilly and the Wall and I am feeling optimistic, which is good for me right now. I have been to a couple of gay bars tonight, and the boys are all out to look for one thing; and we all know what that is right? I have one who "claims" he has connections at one ba,r and that I could get in FREE and can hang with him in the dj's booth. And then there's another one who likes me but is willing to pick up another guy in your face, and then have the nerve to invite him to hang out with you and him, thinking that there might be some kind of monagsea twa between you three. ummm NO! That shit is done and i am not down! You have fun with your boy and try to apologize for it later, but I am not hearin it. I've had this same song and dance before, and lets just say it's PLAYED OUT! Don't come to me trying to "explain" what actually went on that night. Just take you'r quick, ugly piece of ass and leave me alone. shit it's hard to try and keep any kind of relationship nowadays isn't it? I still live on and another man will cum for you. So i hope the booty, booty, booty is good for you tonight. night, night lovey dear! muah! ;)