What do three decades of living really say about any human being? 30. Hm mm. My birthday was a total let down. I didn't expect everyone one I know to just leave me a message at the tone and not get back to me. Of course I am writing about it 3 months later. When I was a little girl, I did not see myself here. Oh yeah I had unattainable goals, but I also had a few realistic dreams. Not that they aren't in the making, it is just they seem to be suspended.
Life keeps on turning, days keeping on moving, nights keep on floating past my subconsciousness. I just found my first paying (not as well as I'd hoped) career. I still have hoops to jump through to finish that career goal. I gave up on a dream, for a moment, to give something else a try. I found something I am good at. I said I'd give teaching 5 years. Maybe I will have learned my lesson.
Money. Could be better, could be worse. Not where I thought I'd be either. I didn't see myself rich, but not quite as poor as I am. I pay my bills. I am responsible. I want to know what extra money a month is like or an allowance that i get to spend any way i want. I want to know what it feels like to see something I want and not have to budget for 3 to 6 months to get it!
Friends. They are out there somewhere. I always had a bunch, but every time I go back to school my social life goes south. Nonexistent-land. Just getting reacquainted with myself after 3 months in HELL. I'm giving that one some time to evolve. (that reminds me I meant to buy Ani's CD)
Love. I thought I had something there for a moment when I was 29 and then it was gone by the time I reached 30. Hurt. I will survive. Somehow we all manage too! Will I do it again? Yeah, in a heart beat. Why do we continue to repeat the same behavior and expect different results every time? Maybe I should change something. I'm not really looking. Haven't had time, but then again the hopeless romantic in me will continue to shine a beacon into the darkness of space and wait a millenia to find its compliment. I believe in fairy tales still - he is out there. I also am a realist, he is human, makes mistakes, and we will balance, compliment each other when we do meet. Hasn't happened yet...
Home. I have one. Right now it looks like I have two hurricanes living as my roommates. Since vacation I have been attempting to create change and order into my apartment. It is slow, but it was neat when my life turned upside down. I am comfortable there. It needs some work. Remodeling is on the schedule with the landlord, so change is in sight. Good or bad we shall find out...
What else is there?
Happiness. There are many things I have learned about happiness. One is it is my responsibility and no one else's to make myself happy. I can allow people to make me feel happy, but only I can make myself happy. I have been a little stressed to the edge of my sanity sort of limit breaking personal evolution sort of experience. So I think one of my new priorities is to figure out what things make me happy and do one of them a day.
Sex. The first thing that comes to mind is a song in the movie A Chorus Line "...me and Paulette, we did it in a graveyard. First time we made love we were not a hit, I thought that this is it, every ones lying. Next time we made love... but then we did it again and I forgot to be scared I guess, cause when we did it again I closed my eyes - surprise. Suprise. Sur-pri-iise. Sweet icicle hot, sweet as a lemon pie, soaring across the sky into the ocean..."
ART - my love, my passion is on hold until i find my sanity, and it is coming to a home theater near me... I am not waiting until it comes out on DVD, I am preordering it to arrive any moment now.
School - almost over. An incomplete to go. 3 seminars. 3 tests. and a few other oddities and I hope paying for my education stops for a while. I will always be a life learner and it is a continual process of growth. When you stop - you die. So I am looking for the educational evolution to grow out of a building and into life, people, experiences not classrooms and tests and tuition payments. We shall see what god wants of me...
Dimartiste's Journal
My Podcast Link
12/31/2004 01:46 #21868
Taking Stock11/28/2004 01:43 #21867
Charm-addictionI have recently discovered how addicting eBay really is. I keep promising myself this is it... but then I have to go to give feed back and then I start to look around and OI! Next thing I know I'm bidding on something and then this competitive edge comes out and I'm like no - you can't have it - I want it! The two year old has arrived and I will bid! I will out bid you! (whoever the competition is...)
So am I a bid-aholic or a charm-aholic... My new addiction is the Italian Modular Charm Link Bracelets. I have definitely gone over my set spending limit and I'm still doing it... I find something and I want it. So I get it. I've rearranged my bills 3 times altogether, it first started with Christmas shopping and not realizing how close Christmas actually is. Some of what I am bidding on is Christmas. Some of it is not. I think I'm in the big 3 oh blues, only my best friend remembered by birthday with presents and though it is completely childish, I'm quite put out by the rest of my friends and family. Hey, I understand when money is tight. But then say you'll get your gift late or something other than letting it go by altogether.
Maybe I should take the high road on this one and let it go. But it has really been biting my heels. It has been 3 months since my birthday and I am PISSED off! I didn't want a party, I just wanted people to remember, give me a card and a stupid ice cream cake. Unfortunately, I do expect more from my family and I still forgive them for not getting me anything. Christmas is coming. SIGH .... heavy sigh ... I hate getting my hopes up. I think that is the main cause for my current addiction on eBay. It is instant gratification for what I want, wither i get it or i don't but I'm not relying on other people to get my gratification from.
I know in another 3 months I'll look back on this whole fiasco and laugh my ass off even though I'll be in debt up to my ears. (Course it happens every Christmas!)
Technically I only have 1 present left to buy; 10 to make and wrap them and I am all done.
So am I a bid-aholic or a charm-aholic... My new addiction is the Italian Modular Charm Link Bracelets. I have definitely gone over my set spending limit and I'm still doing it... I find something and I want it. So I get it. I've rearranged my bills 3 times altogether, it first started with Christmas shopping and not realizing how close Christmas actually is. Some of what I am bidding on is Christmas. Some of it is not. I think I'm in the big 3 oh blues, only my best friend remembered by birthday with presents and though it is completely childish, I'm quite put out by the rest of my friends and family. Hey, I understand when money is tight. But then say you'll get your gift late or something other than letting it go by altogether.
Maybe I should take the high road on this one and let it go. But it has really been biting my heels. It has been 3 months since my birthday and I am PISSED off! I didn't want a party, I just wanted people to remember, give me a card and a stupid ice cream cake. Unfortunately, I do expect more from my family and I still forgive them for not getting me anything. Christmas is coming. SIGH .... heavy sigh ... I hate getting my hopes up. I think that is the main cause for my current addiction on eBay. It is instant gratification for what I want, wither i get it or i don't but I'm not relying on other people to get my gratification from.
I know in another 3 months I'll look back on this whole fiasco and laugh my ass off even though I'll be in debt up to my ears. (Course it happens every Christmas!)
Technically I only have 1 present left to buy; 10 to make and wrap them and I am all done.
10/16/2004 20:05 #21864
The Shoebox TheoryThe theory is that it is possible for males and females of any sexual orientation to admit to romantic feelings and still have a friendship after the confession with an understanding of why both parties are interested in the friendship. (Their motivation to stay in the relationship already in motion.) As long as both parties are honest, truthful and continue the lines of communication the friendship can be saved from the development of romantic feelings of either party.
The Story:
There were once a couple of good friends. One male and one female who shared their poetry and a great deal of their emotions. Poetry was their connection. Life happens. They became closer and shared more and the events that had spawned the poetry were shared. Time moves quickly. Then some strange events happened. The female discovered through this sharing that her friend was in love with another girl. Our female was delightedly happy and decided to do something about it. Being a typically over protective friend to her male friend she, decided that the plan was to get to know this girl, whom she was acquainted with and see if she was WORTHY of her poet friend. She deemed they were. In the process of getting them together an oops happened!
She discovered unbeknownst to her that she was developing feelings for her friend and before she completed the ties between the other two she decided to tell her poet friend her feelings at one of their hangouts and spill her guts. She did. He told her he never felt that way for her, they were just good friends. She conceded this was true. He was concerned are we still going to be able to be friends? She closed her eyes and imagined all the feelings that were at the smallest beginnings and put them in suspended animation in the shoebox of her mind and put the shoebox in the proverbial closet of her mind. She then looked at her friend and said, “no this will not affect our friendship and it will continue as it was before this conversation took place.�
For the most part this was true. They continued to talk, share poetry and dreams. She finally got the girl of his dreams to admit to her feelings for her poet friend and the poetess was left with great poetry to write.
THE REST OF THE STORY:
The poetess began working on her own things, due to the fact; her two friends were spending more of their time together and not as a group. People drifted apart. The poetess continued periodically to stay in touch, but as time wore on and more and more promised visits and the get together’s were broken. She decided to let them go. One night many years and months later the phone rang and her poet friend was on the other end asking to hang out for coffee and some poetry. The poetess was renewed with hope that the friendship hadn’t died and accepted the invitation. The poetess met the poet at one of their old time hang out spots and had coffee. They caught up on the details. Friendly flirtations flipped.
The poet informed the poetess that he had not stopped thinking about the what if, of the two of them. (Editor’s note: Poet and the girl of his dreams are now engaged and live in their own house, found out through the grapevine.) Poetess was slightly confused. Did girl of his dreams leave him? No, she is out of town visiting the family. Poetess continues the state of confusion. What do you mean us? He then in great detail spoke about their meeting where poetess took all confessed emotions (at least the romantic ones) and placed into the shoebox in the proverbial closet encounter, at the hang out place they never visited again.
Poetess took a deep breath and said you’d better explain yourself and in greater detail. He then flattered her about her beauty and how he missed their conversations, but most of all wondered what sex between them would be like. Poetess flattered, pissed off and really hurt from the gapping wound left from the unwanted removal of the
s
hoebox remarked plainly that the friendship changing had not been her issue. As too her beauty, why can’t some untaken straight man with ethics tell her that. Then said the sex would be emotionless and mechanical, simply because the emotions you have asked me to retrieve have not been nurtured, and have been placed in a spot of respect for their friendship. All of their friendships he, the poet, she, the poetess and the girl of his dreams. The sacrifice that was made was of ones feelings for the greater good of all involved, now you are asking me to enter into a relationship that I wanted 8 years ago, without the right to call you my own. How well do you know me? What would the girl of his dreams say? He did not know because she does not know the conversation was taking place. The poetess asked, “what do you think she would say, considering she has a great many issues with competition, many insecurities and a desire for your undying love. True, it might be unrealistic of me to judge, but unless girl of your dreams is in love with me, then you might have much bigger problems. I am unsure I am qualified to deal with those issues and not sure I care to enter into this bargain since I gain nothing once again.�
The poet friend quickly recovered with something witty and was careful to leave sleeping dogs lie with small talk, promises of getting together to keep their friendship alive and them leaving.
UPDATE to theory:
Poetess has continued to live life to the fullest. She has shared the theory of being able to put romantic emotions successfully away in the proverbial closet. Friendship will come an go depending on the individuals and the basis and motivation of the friendship.
The Singer (new to our cast) heard poetess’ theory and says it is bunk. Singer believes that there is no such thing as sex not getting in the way of a friendship between a female and male friendship. Singer stays the no she is not interested in all the men she is friends with, but you never know how they feel about you. Poetess defends theory by stating that it is possible for either the female or male who has the romantic feelings to put it to the side for the good of the friendship. Singer says that if they don’t end up in bed then fine, but usually there is no friendship. Both get into detail life experiences and dating issues and relationship issues and haggles an end to the discussion, the ability to agree to disagree.
New Story (abridged) (for all those who have heard it too many times)…
New friendship, 10 years and running. Distance. Life happens. Keeping in touch. Poetess finds herself in a similar situation, but this time is unaware of the emotions. Decides to confess. (Confession is good for the soul. Beware the listener…) Boy confesses many things too, but had no idea the poetess felt that way about him. Boy also confesses he is in a new relationship and doesn’t know what to do. They continue long conversations. Boy goes on vacation. Boy calls more frequently with more questions about everything and the kitchen sink. Friendship continues. Boy knows poetess is interested in another party. Boy is still dating new girl. Poetess goes on vacation. When she returns to discover that 6 months have passed a no word from Boy.
Singer, on trip with band and poetess to visit Boy before the vacation goes badly. Singer gets involved. Singer has very different perspective than poetess. Poetess argues, feels hurt, and moves on.
Ending pending…
Meditation:
Poetess lets go and lets live. Hurt, yes. New theory developing: never introduce your best friends to each other if they don’t know each other already. Poetess gracefully bows out. Part of her believes in the Boy and knows someday he will call to talk. Poetess and Singer still friends? Poetess forgives herself for loving Boy, and poet. Ponders that the issue isn’t the theory that has faults but the other women involved who don’t believe in themselves.
Problem with theory is the hum
ans in
volved and no control group. Boy also knows about the poet. Shoebox theory evolution. No one wants to be in the proverbial shoebox.
Moral to the story:
In friendship we are so much more, but are we friends with ourselves first?
The Story:
There were once a couple of good friends. One male and one female who shared their poetry and a great deal of their emotions. Poetry was their connection. Life happens. They became closer and shared more and the events that had spawned the poetry were shared. Time moves quickly. Then some strange events happened. The female discovered through this sharing that her friend was in love with another girl. Our female was delightedly happy and decided to do something about it. Being a typically over protective friend to her male friend she, decided that the plan was to get to know this girl, whom she was acquainted with and see if she was WORTHY of her poet friend. She deemed they were. In the process of getting them together an oops happened!
She discovered unbeknownst to her that she was developing feelings for her friend and before she completed the ties between the other two she decided to tell her poet friend her feelings at one of their hangouts and spill her guts. She did. He told her he never felt that way for her, they were just good friends. She conceded this was true. He was concerned are we still going to be able to be friends? She closed her eyes and imagined all the feelings that were at the smallest beginnings and put them in suspended animation in the shoebox of her mind and put the shoebox in the proverbial closet of her mind. She then looked at her friend and said, “no this will not affect our friendship and it will continue as it was before this conversation took place.�
For the most part this was true. They continued to talk, share poetry and dreams. She finally got the girl of his dreams to admit to her feelings for her poet friend and the poetess was left with great poetry to write.
THE REST OF THE STORY:
The poetess began working on her own things, due to the fact; her two friends were spending more of their time together and not as a group. People drifted apart. The poetess continued periodically to stay in touch, but as time wore on and more and more promised visits and the get together’s were broken. She decided to let them go. One night many years and months later the phone rang and her poet friend was on the other end asking to hang out for coffee and some poetry. The poetess was renewed with hope that the friendship hadn’t died and accepted the invitation. The poetess met the poet at one of their old time hang out spots and had coffee. They caught up on the details. Friendly flirtations flipped.
The poet informed the poetess that he had not stopped thinking about the what if, of the two of them. (Editor’s note: Poet and the girl of his dreams are now engaged and live in their own house, found out through the grapevine.) Poetess was slightly confused. Did girl of his dreams leave him? No, she is out of town visiting the family. Poetess continues the state of confusion. What do you mean us? He then in great detail spoke about their meeting where poetess took all confessed emotions (at least the romantic ones) and placed into the shoebox in the proverbial closet encounter, at the hang out place they never visited again.
Poetess took a deep breath and said you’d better explain yourself and in greater detail. He then flattered her about her beauty and how he missed their conversations, but most of all wondered what sex between them would be like. Poetess flattered, pissed off and really hurt from the gapping wound left from the unwanted removal of the
s
hoebox remarked plainly that the friendship changing had not been her issue. As too her beauty, why can’t some untaken straight man with ethics tell her that. Then said the sex would be emotionless and mechanical, simply because the emotions you have asked me to retrieve have not been nurtured, and have been placed in a spot of respect for their friendship. All of their friendships he, the poet, she, the poetess and the girl of his dreams. The sacrifice that was made was of ones feelings for the greater good of all involved, now you are asking me to enter into a relationship that I wanted 8 years ago, without the right to call you my own. How well do you know me? What would the girl of his dreams say? He did not know because she does not know the conversation was taking place. The poetess asked, “what do you think she would say, considering she has a great many issues with competition, many insecurities and a desire for your undying love. True, it might be unrealistic of me to judge, but unless girl of your dreams is in love with me, then you might have much bigger problems. I am unsure I am qualified to deal with those issues and not sure I care to enter into this bargain since I gain nothing once again.�
The poet friend quickly recovered with something witty and was careful to leave sleeping dogs lie with small talk, promises of getting together to keep their friendship alive and them leaving.
UPDATE to theory:
Poetess has continued to live life to the fullest. She has shared the theory of being able to put romantic emotions successfully away in the proverbial closet. Friendship will come an go depending on the individuals and the basis and motivation of the friendship.
The Singer (new to our cast) heard poetess’ theory and says it is bunk. Singer believes that there is no such thing as sex not getting in the way of a friendship between a female and male friendship. Singer stays the no she is not interested in all the men she is friends with, but you never know how they feel about you. Poetess defends theory by stating that it is possible for either the female or male who has the romantic feelings to put it to the side for the good of the friendship. Singer says that if they don’t end up in bed then fine, but usually there is no friendship. Both get into detail life experiences and dating issues and relationship issues and haggles an end to the discussion, the ability to agree to disagree.
New Story (abridged) (for all those who have heard it too many times)…
New friendship, 10 years and running. Distance. Life happens. Keeping in touch. Poetess finds herself in a similar situation, but this time is unaware of the emotions. Decides to confess. (Confession is good for the soul. Beware the listener…) Boy confesses many things too, but had no idea the poetess felt that way about him. Boy also confesses he is in a new relationship and doesn’t know what to do. They continue long conversations. Boy goes on vacation. Boy calls more frequently with more questions about everything and the kitchen sink. Friendship continues. Boy knows poetess is interested in another party. Boy is still dating new girl. Poetess goes on vacation. When she returns to discover that 6 months have passed a no word from Boy.
Singer, on trip with band and poetess to visit Boy before the vacation goes badly. Singer gets involved. Singer has very different perspective than poetess. Poetess argues, feels hurt, and moves on.
Ending pending…
Meditation:
Poetess lets go and lets live. Hurt, yes. New theory developing: never introduce your best friends to each other if they don’t know each other already. Poetess gracefully bows out. Part of her believes in the Boy and knows someday he will call to talk. Poetess and Singer still friends? Poetess forgives herself for loving Boy, and poet. Ponders that the issue isn’t the theory that has faults but the other women involved who don’t believe in themselves.
Problem with theory is the hum
ans in
volved and no control group. Boy also knows about the poet. Shoebox theory evolution. No one wants to be in the proverbial shoebox.
Moral to the story:
In friendship we are so much more, but are we friends with ourselves first?
10/23/2004 19:23 #21866
MISER part oneThe Miser
Late turn of the century, early 1900's clothes. There is this man who is building some kind of project for this rich and powerful man. The customer never seems to have a name and his face is always blurred he wants the gallows built and there are rings at the top and heavy duty pulleys to suspend objects, all this out in the open deep into the woods on his estate. The builder is excited and is a handsome blond man with light blue shocking eyes and a magnificent body, busting out of his tailored suit. He exudes this happiness at his work and does it with the finest craftsmanship and without question builds these idiosyncratic edifices. This is the main reason this man is chosen. The work is in progress when I flip to the future...
These young teenage boys are playing video games and when the pizza deliver guy comes turn on the cable TV, to see what's on... the see a documentary on this mysterious miser that lived in there town. They were so engrossed they watched to whole program to figure out where his property extended so they could check it out. One of the guys so excited about this find called his girlfriend to see if she wanted in on the discovery. Her and her best friend answered and said they'd be over to watch. They got all gussed up in dresses and thought they'd be cuddling on the couch and eating pizza. Excited they walk over to the guy’s house the boyfriends were at. In the meantime the boys so excited over this documentary are grabbing maps of the city with the ones they printed out from the website via the show that was on and are juxtaposing the maps to find out where the man lived. They had this silly idea there was treasure because he was so rich and the inheritance was missing. They figured that was the real story behind the documentary. The girls arrive to empty pizza boxes and over hormonal teenage boys ready for the quest for treasure. The boys explain everything but then realized the girls were not dressed for digging. The plan was formulated. The boy who did not have a girlfriend was to take their girlfriends back to the one girls house they had called originally for a change of clothes and the missing supplies. Then met the other two boys on the land of this old estate, which has been divided up into parcels of land of a farmer, the judge, and a public park. The other pieces of the estate would be in some people’s backyards and the like.
Late turn of the century, early 1900's clothes. There is this man who is building some kind of project for this rich and powerful man. The customer never seems to have a name and his face is always blurred he wants the gallows built and there are rings at the top and heavy duty pulleys to suspend objects, all this out in the open deep into the woods on his estate. The builder is excited and is a handsome blond man with light blue shocking eyes and a magnificent body, busting out of his tailored suit. He exudes this happiness at his work and does it with the finest craftsmanship and without question builds these idiosyncratic edifices. This is the main reason this man is chosen. The work is in progress when I flip to the future...
These young teenage boys are playing video games and when the pizza deliver guy comes turn on the cable TV, to see what's on... the see a documentary on this mysterious miser that lived in there town. They were so engrossed they watched to whole program to figure out where his property extended so they could check it out. One of the guys so excited about this find called his girlfriend to see if she wanted in on the discovery. Her and her best friend answered and said they'd be over to watch. They got all gussed up in dresses and thought they'd be cuddling on the couch and eating pizza. Excited they walk over to the guy’s house the boyfriends were at. In the meantime the boys so excited over this documentary are grabbing maps of the city with the ones they printed out from the website via the show that was on and are juxtaposing the maps to find out where the man lived. They had this silly idea there was treasure because he was so rich and the inheritance was missing. They figured that was the real story behind the documentary. The girls arrive to empty pizza boxes and over hormonal teenage boys ready for the quest for treasure. The boys explain everything but then realized the girls were not dressed for digging. The plan was formulated. The boy who did not have a girlfriend was to take their girlfriends back to the one girls house they had called originally for a change of clothes and the missing supplies. Then met the other two boys on the land of this old estate, which has been divided up into parcels of land of a farmer, the judge, and a public park. The other pieces of the estate would be in some people’s backyards and the like.
10/16/2004 20:08 #21865
Dancin’ with myself, uh-oh a-oh…Billy you’re my idol… Back to something I know. My life being turn upside, boy you turnin’ me inside out and round and round. I forgot how much music can invigorate the soul. My mamma don tol’ me, when I was in pigtails, hon, a man is a two face, he’ll give you the big eye and when his big talkin’s done…The Blues in the Night.
Then movies, back to my books and feeding my brain, and I almost forgot about the people train. Am I distracting myself or just spending and little quality time…? A little stroll down memory lane… I remember all the musical moments in my life. One glorious hit tune after another. Does my life go platinum? Or am I hiding from the pa-pa-rot-si?
I’m burning up for your love… maybe I should be a vampire and suck it out of them or just walk out into the light of day. DAY – O. DAAAYYY –OOOOO Daylight come and I better drink-a-the-rum. Except I don’t like to wallow in my own pity, dislike hangovers (a development with old age), and really don’t need to take a depressant. I am depressed enough. The blues hits at night. I wear my sunglasses at night so I can so I can… watch you weave your story lies, hmmm. I’d quote weird Al except all I got is take an egg and BEAT IT!
Cooking channels are all the rage, kick it up a notch, BAM! Gotta love Emeril. Which reminds me of a Cosby show episode where Theo learns to carve the bird like so… Bill says after seeing his attempt to carve the turkey why didn’t Theo just take a cherry bomb and let the guests eat the turkey off the ceiling and floor. Bringing me back to my strange love, depressed thoughts and no amount of distractions working.
I escape into the SILENCE, which I was not enjoying forgive me Depeche Mode, but I found out I was not alone. Something deep in me, a spiritual ballad without words radiates from my long nights alone, tired and needing a little forgiveness… I will walk with you until clouds move away, I’ll walk with you… I’m the one who’s gonna help you see the light, I be right there… walk with you… each and every day.
Remember me, Lord, when you walk into your kingdom. From this retired disc jockey, who knows well there is a melody for every mood. A song in every person’s heart that must be sung and praised. There is a magic…called LIFE. There is Sweet Honey in the Rock. There is a moment captured in our mind with the help of a tune. A bump and grind, sexual healing – SATISFACTION kind of moment that can lead into an everlasting love that is simply unforgettable. Or the Sentimental Journey we take when we hear the sacred sounds melt those memories into the instrumental moments of our lives.
Let the music play …on…Duende.
Then movies, back to my books and feeding my brain, and I almost forgot about the people train. Am I distracting myself or just spending and little quality time…? A little stroll down memory lane… I remember all the musical moments in my life. One glorious hit tune after another. Does my life go platinum? Or am I hiding from the pa-pa-rot-si?
I’m burning up for your love… maybe I should be a vampire and suck it out of them or just walk out into the light of day. DAY – O. DAAAYYY –OOOOO Daylight come and I better drink-a-the-rum. Except I don’t like to wallow in my own pity, dislike hangovers (a development with old age), and really don’t need to take a depressant. I am depressed enough. The blues hits at night. I wear my sunglasses at night so I can so I can… watch you weave your story lies, hmmm. I’d quote weird Al except all I got is take an egg and BEAT IT!
Cooking channels are all the rage, kick it up a notch, BAM! Gotta love Emeril. Which reminds me of a Cosby show episode where Theo learns to carve the bird like so… Bill says after seeing his attempt to carve the turkey why didn’t Theo just take a cherry bomb and let the guests eat the turkey off the ceiling and floor. Bringing me back to my strange love, depressed thoughts and no amount of distractions working.
I escape into the SILENCE, which I was not enjoying forgive me Depeche Mode, but I found out I was not alone. Something deep in me, a spiritual ballad without words radiates from my long nights alone, tired and needing a little forgiveness… I will walk with you until clouds move away, I’ll walk with you… I’m the one who’s gonna help you see the light, I be right there… walk with you… each and every day.
Remember me, Lord, when you walk into your kingdom. From this retired disc jockey, who knows well there is a melody for every mood. A song in every person’s heart that must be sung and praised. There is a magic…called LIFE. There is Sweet Honey in the Rock. There is a moment captured in our mind with the help of a tune. A bump and grind, sexual healing – SATISFACTION kind of moment that can lead into an everlasting love that is simply unforgettable. Or the Sentimental Journey we take when we hear the sacred sounds melt those memories into the instrumental moments of our lives.
Let the music play …on…Duende.