i have been such a freaking basket case as of late, so i apologize for all the bipolar entries. school has been nuts, and i'm stressing out about not being able to go out with (e:lilho) cause i have no money cause i can't find a job because i don't have a car because i don't have any money. it's a vicious circle. i'm going to try pet supplies plus this week, godhelpme.
i didn't go to school on friday or monday or yesterday, but instead stayed home and didn't shower and sang along to alexz johnson songs. she's freaking awesome.
and school's been so busy- i don't know what i was on when i signed up for AP art history. also, i have an astronomy test today which i am sure to fail. it's an easy class, but i think i must have a mental block for astronomy, because it all goes WHOOSH right over my head. however, i've been writing a lot a lot a lot the past couple weeks, in light of certain events/revelations, and everything seems to be coming out relatively decent. i am never happier than when i've been writing, no matter how sad the material is.

i think every girl has that one skinny skirt that they don't fit into and that you know you've lost weight when you can fit yr ass into it.
well, this past spring, i bought this crazy pink skirt from lord &taylor that was mad expensive and didn't fit. i know, i am stupid. i couldn't even get the zipper up.
well, last nite, i tried it on, and it fits. perfectly. twenty pounds down, twenty-five/thirty to go.

take that, america's next top model!

hopefully i'll be able to scrape together some cash some (e:lilho), (e:tina) and i can go out on friday.

also, i'll be online tonite during the oc, if anyone wants to enjoy the experience that IS orange county with me.

gah, time for photography. i should not have come to school sober today.

Leave your name and e-mail address (for privacy) and
1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what songs and movies remind me of you.
3. I'll pick a quote or lyrics that i think suits you.
4. I'll tell you a secret.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. I'll describe, in detail, what I find sexy about you.
9. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal.

Alison's Note:
I usually hate these things, but i think this one could be neat within our little group of minions.
You do not HAVE to post in this yr own jrnl, but it'd be cute if you did.

today is hornet/jacket day at my school. everyone in the school, teachers included, are either a green hornet or a yellow jacket. there is a sort of general personality to a hornet and another to a jacket, but people are often misplaced. i am a hornet. we are often quiet and bookish, while jackets are outgoing and crazy like foxes. once you are on a team you are on it for life. eighty year old women come back to my school and fight with people on the other team.
so today, hornet/jacket day, is when the freshmen and new students get initiated into their teams. everyone is dressed all crazy-like in their color and go around the school putting up signs that say things like 'jackets take too long to think of come backs' and 'adam brody is a hornet!' it's really cute.
we have twenty-minute classes and then the activities begin at noon, though i've never stayed for that silliness. my mom's picking me up at noon and we're going to the reservation to buy smokes.
i am feeling uncomfortable. i'm supposed to be set up with that jim guy tonite, and i am really not in the mood. oh well, maybe it well help with thangs... nah, maybe i'll call and cancel... again.


if anyone wants to do something tonite, coffee or whatevah, call me. hopefully i will have evaded the horrid world of dating curly blond-haired preppy boys and will be doing my homework like i should.
until then... let's make out.



P.S. <-- this is funny

now i am a confused red-head. yes folks, that's right! because of popular demand i have gone back to the red-side.
... but am confused for an entirely different reason. intrigued? i think not.

i'm really quite happy, for the moment. i'm in the mac lab all by myself, and the leaves are changing and the stand-up fan is blowing at the perfect speed/angle, and i'm not wearing a bra and i've got a bit of a crush and i'm listening to the itunes indie station and am not planning on wearing a bra tomorrow either and i'm rambling.
this station plays really good music- they've got neutral milk.

sometimes things are good and simple and it overwhelms me and makes me sadder than anything. i want things to stay sweet and affectionate and pocket-sized like a note i can carry around when yr not around.

i think maybe i'm imagining it, so i'll sit patiently and wait my turn. this can't possibly be the way i think it is.