It is becoming more and more fashionable these days to come up with variations of The Onion/Colbert on Web Sites. I came across this little gem today, and I really have to share.

I give you, The People's Cube:

You can even have The People's Economist, Paul Krugman, answer your questions about the evils of capitalism and the benefits of collective ownership:

"Everybody Loves Ahmedinejad" Rally & Fun Activities:

Also notice on the right, under News We Don't Have Time To Write About - funny funny funny. "Harry Reid bangs shoe on table: 'We will bury you!'"

My turn. *wide grin, not wide stance*



Doesn't this bear a suspicious resemblance to:



I would like to think that it is actually based on the American flag, instead of the China flag, but we all know that the Libs hate American flags that are fireproof.

Hahaha. Oh, man. Seriously though, did the same company work on the Libs' logo that worked on the RNC logo? Even with my meager Photoshop skills I'm sure I could come up with better material.

Democrats Propose Cig Tax Hike To Fund Child Health Care:

From FNC, via the Associated Press:

It's obvious whoever wrote this for the AP takes a very cynical view of things, and brings up a good point about who exactly is getting taxed. That is something, as a smoker myself, I hadn't immediately thought of, but it is a very good reason to oppose this method of funding health care.

Let's think about the goals of the tax:

1) Balloon SCHIP by $35B.
2) Discourage people from smoking.

What happens if LESS people smoke, under this plan? The politicians say outright that is one outcome they would like to see, but it would also result in less money to be available for SCHIP. Now what would happen if every smoker in the USA quit tomorrow? That $35B that the government so desperately needs "for the children" will disintegrate. Do the politicians expect us to believe that costs are going to go down, or that children will cease to need health care? Why are we imposing taxes on people who can least afford to pay them?

I would think the more likely scenario is for the government to continue increasing these taxes to compensate for lost "customers", and continue to take the attitude that someone else is going to have to make the very difficult choices.

It is sickening that our government needs smokers for revenue, just like the tobacco companies. They depend on the addictive nature of the product to support themselves. They issue double speak. They are snakes.

What's really happening here is that the politicians are preying on a group of politically unpopular people, instead of doing a politically unpopular thing (raising everyone's taxes), and introducing these Mickey Mouse proposals because few of them are willing to risk standing up and saying "Yes, we should fund kid's health care better, we are going to do the right thing here, and all of us have to pay for it."

It's just shocking, but maybe I can feel better about myself because my shameful, disgusting habit is going to result in some kid being able to get their shots and medicines. If I decide to quit, am I an uncompassionate fuck?

Chances are, for better or for worse, you deserve it. I love writing about people, and about my experiences, and I err on the side of kindness most of the time anyway. There's nothing to be gained by picking on easy prey. What can I say, I'm just that nice of a guy.

There are also people who matter, and there are people who, along with their opinions, don't matter. Generally both groups of people know who they are, or at least they should know who they are. Then again, some folks just aren't all that clever.

I tried being nice, I tried being a rotten bastard, and the results were the same, so at some point I pretty much had to stop giving a shit. So I don't. I freely admit my shortcomings, and unlike most I have no delusions of perfection.

I've made my regrettable decisions, starting nearly a year ago, and they're in the past. I don't understand why it can't stay there, unless something I've done is so awful that it affects someone long-term, in which case I am not terribly difficult to get a hold of.

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The pithy version? What's done is done, and what's in the past is in the past, and I am perfectly okay with it. I'm not mad, upset, sick, or anything else, but at this moment I'm a little (or a lot) weirded out.

When you find yourself in a minor freak out:

1) Take a step back from the situation.

2) Clear your head of all the clutter. Most of it is irrational junk.

3) Don't meander into the trap of self doubt.

4) Remember nothing is permanent.

5) Remember most problems have a solution.

6) Remember, unless you're six feet under or starving you're ok.

7) Someone somewhere gives a damn. You're not alone.

8) Like on a tread climber, going uphill means more work.

9) Think of the big picture. Things really aren't that bad.

10) Find your resolve, find your bollocks, and move on with it.