So apparently there was a fire on Elmwood, one door south from the Rite Aid Pharmacy and Bryant. this is not very far from my own apt. and felly and I just kept on sleeping, oblivious. According to the story it was a historic house built in the 1890's and the materials that were used in building it can not be found today. the link is here if anyone is interested:

In the article you can really feel the pain of the guy who owned the house and puts lots of money and work into it. He loved that house and compared losing it to the death of his parents. Very sad. I am not sure where I am going with this, but I guess it is making me think about loving inanamate things, objects really, and the human ability to bring them to life in all but the true sense of the word.

Moving on to more mundane things like the weather. Tomorrow it is supposed to be beautiful and felly and I both kinda have the day off (although I feel like I can never have a day off because the reading just keeps on coming). Either way, I know that beautiful days like today and tomorrow will not be around for much longer, so I plan on enjoying them as much as I can.

In other news. I have come to discover that driving west on 33 at 7:00pm is the worst idea ever. The sun is soooo blinding that I can't see the road, the car in front of me, the signs, nothing. For this reason, and this reason only, I am looking forward to the sun setting a little earlier each day. and if you happen to be driving on that road at the time, I am the douche bag driving 50 mph in the middle while people pass me on both sides because I can't see a godam thing!

Note: this was initially a comment, but I kinda went off and decided to make a post out of it.

Way to go Drew. It is sad but true that crazies like Fred Phelps and others wave the banner of religion and christian beliefs using the name only to spout hatefull slurs that encourage violence. This only leads to more hatred of these so called christians. I refuse to believe that all christians are like this, because, for example, my parents are quite religous, every sunday church goers if you will, yet openly accept me and my partner with loving arms. granted they were not always so accepting, but sometimes all it takes is a little love, patience, and guidance and cure those nasty habits. fundamentalists, extremists, people that teach hate...they should not and do not exemplify christianity. they are confused, scared, and ignorant to what the bible really teaches...love, respect, honesty. not that i am saying that christianity works for me, because after 18 years of (presbyterian)religious knowledge, i know that, right now, it doesn't. that however does not mean that I go around disrespecting those who find meaning within that community. whatever floats your boat, thats why I say. i think throughout history, as Drew said, people have shown themselves to need religion, spirituality of some sort or another. why? to find meaning, understanding, peace of mind, security. many reasons I am sure. the problem comes only when one group refuses to acknowledge that other options exist. I have my beliefs, you have yours...can't we all just get along?

Here is the proof of what happened last night at the Emmy's. As soon as I saw it I knew that something was fishy. Yes, she swore in the part that was cut out, but there was no bleep, just a loooong awkward cut away shot that could possibly be mistaken for a technical error, but you watch, decide for youself.

I spent the majority if yesterday immersed in this book called Fledgling by Octavia Butler. It is a story about vampires, so to speak, and this particular girl who is a result of genetic mixing of humans and vampires. Her skin is brown which makes her less susceptible to sunlight, so she can be out during the day and can sleep without falling into a deep sleep that doesn't permit her to wake up till nightfall. Her entire family was murdered because of her mixed blood and she is trying to save her own life while simultaneously figuring out who she is, because she lost her memory but not her life during the first attack on her home. I have not gotten to the end, but it is becoming apparent that other vampires are trying to keep their kind "pure", seperate from humans gentically, and that is why they hate her and want her dead. A very interesting take on otherness, hatred, and fear.

I have always been a reader. I remember being young and staying up late reading, becoming so connected with the characters to the point of never wanting the book to end. And now, well, I have read 200+ pages of this book since yesterday, because I couldn't put it down. Partly because it is a relief to be reading a novel rather than theory of one type or another, but also because, even though it is fiction, it is about people. About people's lives, relationships, hardships, joys and sufferings and all that jazz. This is what I cling to. This is why feminism grabbed me the way it did, and this is why I despise reading abstract theories that have nothing to do with individual people. And even though I accept a certain universalism about humanity, I think it is dangerous theoretical ground to walk on.

Dar dar...I have to write a paper. The first paper (whoa 2 pages) I have written on over two years. The last paper I wrote was 15 pages about the way beauty standards affect black women and white women differently. I loved that class because the woman who taught it was from Ohio and sounded a lot like my Aunt. She was also a Black Panther and taught Anthropology with a lens that addressed race and gender and class. She was cool. This paper, not so cool.

I have finished ALL my readings for this week! I have spent the majority of this week reading about various approaches to human rights, human security, and human development. I must admit, this kind of stuff is not my forte. I have never been particularly interested in politics because I lean to the side of things that assume that for the most part, they are all corrupt in some way or another. I question the feasibility of these ideas...is it really possible to put a minimum of rights and securities into place through institutions that are perhaps causing the very problem they are supposedly trying to eradicate? Is there even a possibility of international consensus on what these rights should be?
I guess I haven't really thought very much about what IS going on in the international arena to address these kinds of issues. Yes, I know that the UN exists, I have indeed heard of the Human Rights Approach. But did you know that there is also the Human Development Approach, the Human Security Approach, the Basic Needs Approach, etc? I certainly had no idea that there was this type of academic theorizing going on. I must perhaps give them a hand for attempting to name and address poverty, hunger, health care, education etc, on a global level, but one thing they do not do is ask WHY or HOW these issues became realities in the first place. It does no good, in my opinion, to try to "fix" these realities, to offer solutions, without first addressing the problems. It is easier to talk about money, about health services, about children going to school, than to talk about ideologies, hegemonies, pervasive cultural constructions of gender, race, class, etc. This, to me, is like trying to run the wrong way on an escalator. You can put lots and lots of energy into trying to get to your goal, and it sure does look like you are working hard, but chances are you will run out of steam before making it to the top.
Is my idea less realistic then theirs? Is it possible to change hundreds of years worth of oppressive ideologies? How many generations would it take before they were completely if ever gone? How would one even go about attempting this massive feat? I honestly don't know.
I am not saying that I don't think people, nations, institutions of various shapes and sizes should stop their efforts to make the world a little more bearable for those in need, but I do not think that this is a sufficient strategy for ending the hunger, the povety, the pain that is so prevelant in this world.