As long as you peeps are in (e:chat) withdrawal, maybe a brief follow-up to my craigslist drama could help fill the void. Ok, maybe not, but it's all I've got.
So, my Dear John email was well-received. Then again, maybe he's on myspace right now ranting about the b!tch who dumped him before a proper chem test could even be conducted. But somehow I don't think so.
See, that's one difference between guys and girls. I just don't feel it, so I'm not going to go there. Not because he's not "the one" - I'd be happy to screw a guy I might never want to carry a conversation on with. But just because I can carry a conversation on with a guy doesn't mean I'd screw him.
In other words, it won't take me six weeks of screwing his brains out to come to the sudden realization, oh wait! there's no chemistry here! sorry!
Yeah, that could really piss a chick off. Hell hath no fury for sure.
Twisted's Journal
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03/08/2006 01:33 #36661
Dear John...Category: boys and girls
03/07/2006 14:08 #36660
B-I-N-G-...d'Oh!Category: dating
I made first contact with a guy I met on craigslist last night. First off, the pre-game was flawless - short, quick, to the point - just the way I like it. Three email volleys over one short hour and we had a date set up for the next evening. Anything longer than that is just asking for trouble. Besides, why should I type my life story when I can tell it to you over a nice beer in a dive bar?
So I can tell right away he's practical and realistic - which might sound boring but scores very high with me. I get to the bar first, which lives up to it's description, so there's another point in his favor. I do a quick walk-through and don't see anyone matching his description, so I order a beer at the bar. A table full of bike courier types taking full advantage of the all day Monday happy hour immediately call me over. I can't understand a damn word they're saying, but there's much fuss over the scarf I wore as my identifiable feature (red carnations being out of season). So I'm thinking I must have walked by him after all, and hot damn! these guys may be drunk but they're darn cute! Although much younger than the guy I'm supposed to be meeting, so no such luck.
I reluctantly disengage myself and grab a booth at the back of the bar to wait. Mr. Practical shows up right on schedule within the 15 minute window he gave me. He gets a beer and the life storytelling begins.
I won't even go into all the unexpected commonalities we turned up over two beers, like moving here from Boston 4-5 years ago, working for rival tech publishers - which gave us the context to appreciate and the ideal positioning to launch into the Internet age. Seriously, if you weren't in the thick of it at that time there's no way to describe it.
Oh yeah, and this is for (e:Paul). When one of the IDG companies he worked for went belly up in the dot com bust, he bought their assets - including two $100k Sun Servers - for a mere $1,000 total to start his own business. Sorry - he already resold them so I can't get you any deals.
Plus he has a Border Collie he adopted from the SPCA. 10 points for that.
So it's like, Bingo!, right? But there was no chemistry - from my side anyway. Is that too much to ask for? He seemed to be into me - walked me to BART, kiss on the cheek, maybe we can catch some live music later this week - all that. Or maybe he's just more realistic than I am. I just don't know any more. If only there were some DIP switches to make that part work it would be so much easier.
So now I have to write the Dear John email (yeah, his name really is John) in response to his email asking me for my phone number. I'll tell him I enjoy hanging out with him, but I don't feel a romantic attraction which I know is what he is looking for. But if he's interested in doing things together as friends, I'd be up for that.
Sounds harsh - it's not like he's butt-ugly or anything, so can I really know I'm not attracted to him this quickly? I once talked to another craigslist guy who was trying to get over his ex. He told me she wasn't at all his "type" physically, so he was surprised he fell for her so hard. I told him attraction is a subjective thing - when you grow to like someone/something, your impression can change too. Maybe the first time you looked at sushi you thought "that can't possibly taste good!" But after trying and liking it, all of a sudden when you see sushi you think "my god! that looks so delicous!" He got that.
Still, since we're talking about a men for women posting I'd rather go on the record with how I'm feeling right now. If we do continue going out and he turns out to be sushi - or I become more realistic - there's always the option to update later.
Back to the bingo board.
So I can tell right away he's practical and realistic - which might sound boring but scores very high with me. I get to the bar first, which lives up to it's description, so there's another point in his favor. I do a quick walk-through and don't see anyone matching his description, so I order a beer at the bar. A table full of bike courier types taking full advantage of the all day Monday happy hour immediately call me over. I can't understand a damn word they're saying, but there's much fuss over the scarf I wore as my identifiable feature (red carnations being out of season). So I'm thinking I must have walked by him after all, and hot damn! these guys may be drunk but they're darn cute! Although much younger than the guy I'm supposed to be meeting, so no such luck.
I reluctantly disengage myself and grab a booth at the back of the bar to wait. Mr. Practical shows up right on schedule within the 15 minute window he gave me. He gets a beer and the life storytelling begins.
I won't even go into all the unexpected commonalities we turned up over two beers, like moving here from Boston 4-5 years ago, working for rival tech publishers - which gave us the context to appreciate and the ideal positioning to launch into the Internet age. Seriously, if you weren't in the thick of it at that time there's no way to describe it.
Oh yeah, and this is for (e:Paul). When one of the IDG companies he worked for went belly up in the dot com bust, he bought their assets - including two $100k Sun Servers - for a mere $1,000 total to start his own business. Sorry - he already resold them so I can't get you any deals.
Plus he has a Border Collie he adopted from the SPCA. 10 points for that.
So it's like, Bingo!, right? But there was no chemistry - from my side anyway. Is that too much to ask for? He seemed to be into me - walked me to BART, kiss on the cheek, maybe we can catch some live music later this week - all that. Or maybe he's just more realistic than I am. I just don't know any more. If only there were some DIP switches to make that part work it would be so much easier.
So now I have to write the Dear John email (yeah, his name really is John) in response to his email asking me for my phone number. I'll tell him I enjoy hanging out with him, but I don't feel a romantic attraction which I know is what he is looking for. But if he's interested in doing things together as friends, I'd be up for that.
Sounds harsh - it's not like he's butt-ugly or anything, so can I really know I'm not attracted to him this quickly? I once talked to another craigslist guy who was trying to get over his ex. He told me she wasn't at all his "type" physically, so he was surprised he fell for her so hard. I told him attraction is a subjective thing - when you grow to like someone/something, your impression can change too. Maybe the first time you looked at sushi you thought "that can't possibly taste good!" But after trying and liking it, all of a sudden when you see sushi you think "my god! that looks so delicous!" He got that.
Still, since we're talking about a men for women posting I'd rather go on the record with how I'm feeling right now. If we do continue going out and he turns out to be sushi - or I become more realistic - there's always the option to update later.
Back to the bingo board.
ajay - 03/08/06 06:19
Say what you will, I have met interesting women through CL.
The latest one (I have yet to set up a date with her) has a snake as a snuggle-buddy. Who can top that?
Say what you will, I have met interesting women through CL.
The latest one (I have yet to set up a date with her) has a snake as a snuggle-buddy. Who can top that?
twisted - 03/07/06 20:18
No - I never did make it to the CL movie. I'm not sure it could rival my own personal experiences anyway, lol.
No - I never did make it to the CL movie. I'm not sure it could rival my own personal experiences anyway, lol.
hodown - 03/07/06 15:44
Ahh the scary world of dating CL style. Did you go see the CL movie?
Ahh the scary world of dating CL style. Did you go see the CL movie?
jenks - 03/07/06 14:49
You're awesome. :)
Not sure I'd have the balls to meet someone off CL. Then again, CL in SF is a little different than CL in B-lo, I imagine. It's pretty lame here, so I gave up. Still love the 'best of' though...
I used to love the bike couriers in DC... we would always make an effort to hang out at 'their' bars...
fun fun.
You're awesome. :)
Not sure I'd have the balls to meet someone off CL. Then again, CL in SF is a little different than CL in B-lo, I imagine. It's pretty lame here, so I gave up. Still love the 'best of' though...
I used to love the bike couriers in DC... we would always make an effort to hang out at 'their' bars...
fun fun.
03/06/2006 14:56 #36659
Real Life Simpsons IntroCategory: tv
03/03/2006 01:14 #36658
woof!02/28/2006 23:17 #36657
40 daysI think I'm the only one in my family, besides possibly my Dad (which is ironic, since he's a minister) who has never given up something [inlink]decoyisryan,13[/inlink] publicly for Lent. Yeah, when I was a kid we avoided eating meat on
Good Friday. At least for breakfast and dinner. You were on your own for school lunch.
Anyway, I thought it was kind of funny when my siblings adopted the practice when they got older. I'm like, did I miss something? Maybe we did that all along and I just forgot? But I don't think so. I remember when my brother visited me in SF for the first time and we went to the Arnold Arboretum in Golden Gate Park and saw these gigantic asparagus-looking plants. It was Lent, and he had given up asparagus. What are the odds? And who the hell gives up asparagus?
I also remember going to my other brother's church the first Sunday in Lent. It must have been for my nephew's First Communion. Anyway, the minister gave an interesting sermon. She suggested, instead of giving up something for Lent - denying yourself something you enjoy - why not "take up" something you've been meaning to do. Get in touch with old friends, volunteer, meditate, read, write. That struck a chord with me, the eternal "be what you are, not what your aren't" person.
This probably doesn't help [inlink]decoyisryan,13[/inlink] at all. But if it were me, I would only give up something I thought would be beneficial to cut back on long term. Otherwise, maybe consider taking up something.
My brother and the giant asparagus
Good Friday. At least for breakfast and dinner. You were on your own for school lunch.
Anyway, I thought it was kind of funny when my siblings adopted the practice when they got older. I'm like, did I miss something? Maybe we did that all along and I just forgot? But I don't think so. I remember when my brother visited me in SF for the first time and we went to the Arnold Arboretum in Golden Gate Park and saw these gigantic asparagus-looking plants. It was Lent, and he had given up asparagus. What are the odds? And who the hell gives up asparagus?
I also remember going to my other brother's church the first Sunday in Lent. It must have been for my nephew's First Communion. Anyway, the minister gave an interesting sermon. She suggested, instead of giving up something for Lent - denying yourself something you enjoy - why not "take up" something you've been meaning to do. Get in touch with old friends, volunteer, meditate, read, write. That struck a chord with me, the eternal "be what you are, not what your aren't" person.
This probably doesn't help [inlink]decoyisryan,13[/inlink] at all. But if it were me, I would only give up something I thought would be beneficial to cut back on long term. Otherwise, maybe consider taking up something.
My brother and the giant asparagus
mrdt - 03/01/06 23:38
giving up asparagus is strange. i usually quit smoking crack for forty days...just kidding
giving up asparagus is strange. i usually quit smoking crack for forty days...just kidding
you really broke up with someone through an e-mail. did you know this guy or was this an internet thing? i guess he had it coming. DT
PS how do you feel about conversation after screwing your brains out??
So if you're happy to screw a guy without possibility of a conversation, how's that any different from what men are accused of doing?