Good Morning! I just wanted to send out a note to everyone to have a happy holiday -- Happy Christmas, Happy Xmas, Happy Chanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa... and for (e:Terry) and Jehovah's Witnesses have a nice December. Any way you celebrate it or spell it, i hope your holiday is everything you wish it to be.

We are up early and will be off to my parent's place shortly. Wish us good luck across the Peace Bridge!!

So, today we got the drum kit all set up. Took a couple of hours, but we got the hang of it ok. Thank goodness (e:Uncutsaniflush) remembered some of the basics that were not in the instructions. I need to fiddle with it to get it just to my specific requirements, whatever they may be. For now, it feels very uncomfortable to be be there with the sticks in my hand. It won't forever though and i will learn. Loudly, but i will. I will get the hang of it all. We even had a guest drummer today for a few minutes, too. (e:Ladycroft) came by for a short visit and had a turn on the throne. I think she did great.

To those of you that asked, yes, my userpic is indeed me. About 20 years ago, but me none the less. At the time, i was going to an "alternative" program at my highschool. Because of my home situation at the time, i was living on my own at a fairly young age and i really wanted to try to stay in school. This program was mainly for adults, but i was accepted into it because i attended the school already and the staff was aware of what was going on for me as far as my living situation. The vice principal of the high school took this picture. I was in his office. I was very tired and in a pissy mood. I think i quit school within a week of that picture being taken. I went to the VP and told him myself. He really tried to help me stay in school, but he just could not afford to pay my rent any more than i could while i was in school.

All my life, i have been a tapper, a thrummer, a fidget monster. When i was a kid, i wasn't allowed to have tic tacs 'cause the sound of me shaking them drove my mom crazy. She was always screaming at me to keep still, to stop tapping, to leave her knitting needles alone. I always thought it was just because i am always uncomfortable, both physically and emotionally and that i need something to do with myself so i don't actually become crazy.

Since before we got married, (e:Uncutsaniflush) has been telling me i would make a good drummer. It used to make me so self-conscious, and i would immediately stop whatever tapping i was doing. Eventually, i was comfortable enough to tap along with a song on the radio when he was near. Now, over 5 years since we met, and 4 since we have been married and spent almost all of our time with each other, he has convinced me that my tapping might lead to something.

Earlier this month, we did some shopping.. browsing and info gathering, really. And it took me a while to decide, but i did. Today, i got my xmas present... to myself and from my wonderfully supportive husand. A brand new drum kit. It scares the fucking shit out of me to begin something like this... i am just a bundle of issues.

But i keep reminding myself that i can do this. That i will do this. That it is supposed to be fun. And i am not too old to learn and do something new. And mostly, that this is supposed to be fun. That i want to do this. That there are times in which the learning process will be frustrating. And that if Meg White can do it, anyone can. Thanks Meg.

Every year for many years now, i have made my mom a calendar for xmas. Last year was the exception. I just didn't have the time after we moved, and finding the file from the year before and getting windows reinstalled back on our comp so i could use CorelDraw just wasn't going to happen. So i altered one (e:Uncutsaniflush) found for me with coloured markers. I know my mom didn't find it nearly as useful. So, this year i was back at it. My mom will get her special calendar. On one 11 x 17 page, it has 3 calendar months on it -- the current month in the middle with the previous month above and the upcoming month below. She uses it a lot for work. The first time i made it for her it took months. I did every single bit by hand. Drew every calendar grid and number and family birthdate on with a sharpie. Today, using CorelDraw, i finished 2006. My mom will be happy to get it this year.

I also found out that cake mixes make really good cookies. I watch a lot of food tv. I just like cooking and baking. I would have made someone a good housewife... And i was watching Semi-Homemade when the very perky host started making cookies with all sorts of weird things. She made one type using chocolate frosting she mixed with butter and graham crumbs rolled into crushed nuts with a hersheys kiss squished on top. Then she got out her cake mixes. And i was hooked. Today, i made one batch with a carrot cake mix and oatmeal. They are pretty good. They were supposed to be with a white cake mix and pumpkin pie spices but i thought the cake mix i had would have those spices. I made another with chocolate cake mix and chips... white and brown. Very good.

We got our first xmas card today. From a woman that used to live next door to my parents. I used to babysit her kids. Nice woman. I think my mom used to think i was weird because i got along with her better than a lot of the kids on our street. What can i say, i was old before i was actually old. It reminds me that i really need to get ours out. I hope the overseas ones make it on time. Back in Canada, they used to say that overseas ones would not make it unless mailed by the 1st of December. I am noticing that USPS is way better than Canada Post.

And mice. Our mouse is back. I thought Max the dog (who visited on American Thanksgiving) scared them away, but one scurried by and interupted dinner tonight. The little bastard mouse! I do not want to kill the damn thing, but if they don't get their furry asses into our humane traps...

It was the 3rd day of December when he was born. This man i love so much. The man who decided to open his heart and his home to me, a weird vegetarian, non driving, emotionally stunted Canadian chick 11 years his junior. He has shown me how hard, yet rewarding, it is to be a better, kinder more open person. He has supported my whims and encouraged me like no other human being ever has before him. There was a time when i was in a shell.. i didn't have a voice to sing. Now, he overhears me singing with a radio. Something i have never done in my life. He has given me a voice. He is my song. He says i make too big a deal of his birthday. But how can i not rejoice the anniversary of the day he was born? How can i not want to shout it out to the sky that this man has given me more than i ever dreamed i would even be able to have? I can't not do it.

Happy Birthday, Walt.