how much for a pound of flesh
the vendors did ask
how much for a pound of your heart
your lover did ask

you know you smile when you sleep?
rolling over, waking up, before you
every morn,
seeing your face, your lips, your smile
hearing your breath when you would roll
over onto my chest
your breast pressed against mine
wet from the shower in you robe, soft
against your cool clean skin
thanking the winds, the sun, the waters
thanking god for bringing you and
i together
walking to work,
happy in the morning,
knowing everything was alright
you were inside of me,
i was inside of you
the little boy in me
the little girl in you
laughter, loving
im going to miss your nitetime smiles
im going to miss your kisses
the little squeak you make when i squeeze you tight
th laught that follows
hearing you complain about what to wear
while i watch the weather
the way you would turn you head
while we danced
i, knowing everyone watching,green
wishing they had what we had
seeing your eyes,
loving your eyes, your smile
god your smile.

told my boss the other day to fuck off. yep, it was great, well not really considering now i am scrambling for a job. it did feel good, but the initial rush wore off at happy hour. it was a job that was going now where to begin with, but i was trying to get interviews so i was not left flat. the only interviews i managed to get were lousy marketing schemes. not jobs, but schemes. pyramid type mothership shit. yeah i really don't think that stuff should be put in the classifieds. its really a bummer to job searchers all over. you send out your resume, accompanied most times with a gut wrenching cover letter, and you get to the interview and the guy does not even have the damn resume on the table, just wants to talk about the GREAT opportunity before me where i can make thousands of dollars, if and only if i bring on 10 other "sales reps" He presents his "success story" smelling of drakkar, brute, or polo and cigarettes. Always has a big raspy your friend in a bar voice, and warm sweaty hands. Handing you a business card for Smith Inc. International TelecomEnterprises.

the only thing to fear?
someone once said was itself.
believe in what you, yourself
know as truth in the seed of your
soul

do not deny the flesh,
it is flush with the emotions of
the heart
breathing in the passion of the sun
high in summer's skies
licking cool dew of nite times
lovers.

confidence in future miracles
only if roots take hold in these dunes
the ocean and the winds conspire against me

May day has come and gone. I always liked the first day of this month. it means only 4 more days until my birthday. good ole cinco de maio or is the de a di? 05/05/05. not too often that happens. pretty cool huh. well i feel as if i am selling my self out. I have an interview on tuesday, and well i already have a gut feeling that it is not going to be a job that i would want to be doing. I have been applying for sales positions. something i detest. Now i am not saying that it is a horrible job for everyone. some people are really really good at it. it is something that i am not good at. but i have come to the end of my rope working for this tyrannt of a man who is my boss. ah but summer is on the way, said it would be here in 15 min to a half hour. haha. thursday, my birthday i am going to spend the day in the village wandering around, hitting up a few places for drinks, browsing the strand, the best book store ever, and then head back to long beach for some live music. it should be a smashing day. my enteries really need some work. it doesn't feel like i am putting my best foot forward. well i am going to read and go to bed. early day tomorrow. i need to get out of here for a while.