we're going to try something here.

I'm going to go to bed early. Right after I'm done typing. I've been falling asleep everywhere lately, and I'm hoping this will cure it. More of a problem is the complete opposition my body has to waking up. In either case, let it be known, I will sleep soon.

Oh yes. This is an experiment. I will attempt to wake up at 7am tomorrow morning and take a walk with me dog to get a cup of coffee and potentially read a book before I have to work. We shall see if this works.

It's sort of like when you were a kid playing basketball, even though people without hands were better than you, and you said, I'll ask her/him out if I make this shot. It's come down to that.

If this doesn't work, I will boycott sleep all together. Who's with me . . .

Would it be too much to ask for a small bout with insomnia?

wake up.

wake up you have stuff to do. You know you want to get it out, but the sleep wants you. But hell, like it matters. wake up.

As he says this to himself, head bobbing over the keyboard, rain falling, cars whizzing by, sirens wailing, the phone rings. He thinks it's her, but of course it's Greg.

I'm in love.

Really.

I think so.

That's great man. I think, well no . . .

Shit no parking spots can I call you back.

Call me tomorrow. Thanks brother, you did it.

Did what.

I'm awake.

You in love?

That depends. I have to write. It's a good night for it.

I found a spot.

Me too.

I'm pissed off because I haven't had a truly disturbing, metaphorical dream in which I'm about to die, in at least a month. About last year at this time, forget it, it was nightly. And they were good. The good ones turned out to be tattoo's on my arms. Maybe that's it. Maybe I'm pining for another tattoo, but I have no horrifying symbolic dreams to interpret. Damn.

That Tears for Fears song is true though, "I think it's kind of funny, I think it's kind of sad, the dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had."

If you've ever came face to face with a 40 foot tidal wave about to drop on you, you know how alive you feel in your sleep. I can't describe the feeling.

God I miss those days.

Well . . . there's always tonight.

Is it truly possible to be with one person and be completely satisfied? I would think that when you find a someone and you both click like the snap of a shutter, well then, why wouldn't it work? But then what if you find people you come across who are interesting, but the only click you hear is them actually taking pictures. What do you do?

Knowing full well that, yes, this might be fun, but ultimately, it won't be the storybook romance you think will eventually happen, do you ride out that boat until you see the one you're supposed to be on? Well then what us that point of dating? It definitely befuddles the mind.
I like you.
Okay.
Let's go out.
Okay.
We're okay together.
Okay.
What's wrong.
It's okay.

I can't do okay, this I have realized. But do you do okay until you trip over amazing?

Has anyone seen amazing around?

And don't say everyone is, because it's all a matter of perspective.

And where does "good" come into play?

Yeah it's working or I'm working. My head still kills me. I apologize for the obscenities but really, when you wake up in a stupor, the only words that come to your mouth are shit and fuck. And fuckshit. And damnit fuck.

okay, once more into the breach dear friends, once more.

I will say this - I WILL NEVER DO THAT AGAIN.

I HOPE.