ahhhhhhh....
procrastination - my #1 dark cloud.
9 yrs + have passed by. no plan executed. no progress made & now a huge change is suppose to change all of that? I don't really know if it can. So much bottled up right now. Waking up and not feeling good about it doesn't help. Having nightmares about it also doesn't help the cause. hello stress. some decisions are easy difficult. this one seems difficult difficult as I have no intentions of going from one relentless cycle to another even more expensive one.
I need three plans. A. B. & C. (c just in case)
I need to be focused on the plan(s)
I need determination (lost a good size of it at least 3 yrs ago)
I need to sacrifice a little now to gain a lot later. (like (e:Dan) said: [inlink]dan,28[/inlink] this morning.) (this is hard but possible)
I need to be more resilient when things don't work out as plan and move on quicker.

So much to plan... So much to get in order. Not enough time to do it...
This has been a jammed pack week of new things etc.
New Baby Nephew arrived healthy as ever & handsome. Labor took over 24 hrs.
I came down with something on wednesday-sick as ever. Got an offer which requires moving pronto. I have no time this weekend to go check it out. I think my aunt may have thought I should cancel my plans and go to dc for a visit being that I have a long weekend available. Friends in town for visiting. Wedding tomorrow ((e:Trisha) & (e:PaulnotPaul)).
Birthday Party on Tuesday!!!
((for those who were sent evites but haven't check their email or their estrip email is no longer in use, it starts @ 6pm-til...Bring Booze-lots to celebrate!!!))

They always good things come in packages. But how do you know its a good thing?
Martha Stewart used to say that all the time and look where she put herself!
I know you won't know without trying but you never know what's behing curtain #1, #2 or #3.

I think I am going to go for it! But I want to make sure I make an informed decision.

:(

[inlink]hodown,86[/inlink] I think there are lots of lessons that we should learn from that we don't. I think we really do learn from most them but carrying out the lesson is the hardest part.

on another note: my body hates me right now. too much torture this week. will have to give happy details later. must prep for work. pray I make it through the day

Little Nephew is born! cutey pie he is...

I think I am back on the wagon. I had a cup of java last night and by morning I had to break open the eggnog coffee. yummy! I subconsciously think I need it since I will be up with Maria for a while today and she is more energetic than me!!!
I will take some for the road too!

I love Fall. It really is one of my favorite times of the year. Family, Friends, Fun and best of all Birthdays!!!

However wonderful, it was freezing in my apt today=seriously. I was all wrapped up in sweats and everything. So I decided to leave and hit the stores (day three since friday). I thought it was bound to be warmer there than here.

Wow, I have been shopping like a teenager with her very first credit card except that I didn't charge anything. I bought my niece a snow suite (baby pink w.brown velvet buttons and collar trim & shoe/hand covers to match), for me a pink hat w/black trim for my black pea coat & a pink fuzzy scarf to match (one of those scarves that you can do funky things with like put over your head, wear as a neck muff,etc.), a pair of black boots (not the hooker ones!) & yet I may take those back; Some Martini glasses, a coloring book for the niecey poo!...

I bought my niece a little black velvet dress & cutesy black velvet shoes which she loves - she is already a shoe queen. I got my soon to be born nephew a sleeper & I purchased tons of scrapbook stuff for my niece and nephew.

I picked up a few bowls, napkins & cup things for my birthday party/happy hour next week. Can't wait for that either. :)

I went out only to look for a dress to wear to Trisha's wedding. No dress. Found one snazzy suit/dress but by that time I didn't feel like spending anymore money.

The second big ticket item I went to purchase this weekend was a camera so that I could capture the new baby's first moments outside of the womb. I went to a few places over the past two days and the store people were of no help(I wish I could tell my customers((all of you taxpayers)) "hey, I just work here, I really don't know crap"). Do I had to do my own research and w/the suggestion of a friend, decided on a Canon digital. I really wanted to replace the one I broke, Sony Mavica, but I don't have the clams to shell out. Besides, that camera is huge. Time to downsize.

I feel like i need a chic size camera that I can get close to professional results to boot. oh yeah, and on a shoestring budget. Uncle sam takes just as much from me as he does you ; ) !!!

So mike & paul call to see if I wanted to go to Marcella's tonight(last night)
I was down so I bummed a cup of java from my neighbor. I am not officially back on the coffee wagon but its starting up...(got some eggnog coffee too during my shopping weekend) So I was buzzed and ready to go... My sister called me just as I was getting ready and said her water broke... (11:45pmish) I was struck with glee...A new baby in a few hours!!! so exciting. little people are facinating.
So anyway, they (Mike&Paul) ended up cancelling. So now I am waiting for my sister to call me back after the doctor calls her. I have had so much caffeine today (chai tea, green tea, coffee) whooa Nelly!

I should scrapbook. Really I should just try to rest as there will be little of that in the hours/days to come...

mr.sandman.....

please turn on your magic beam....

oh mr. sandman
bring me a dream. ;)