So, I'm sitting in bed jabbering with the Megasaurous (she's half in the buff, her hoobers are staring at me mockingly since there will be no lovin' tonight) reading e:pauls journal when blamo! Weiner!

Ahhh, I really love those dudes... boy that sounds weird, but let me clarify. I love how completely unabashed they are at times. I'm sure Paul knows that everyone is reading his journal even work folks (hi Del, hey Cathy!), but that won't stop Paul from sportin' a lil flip flap to show you peeps what he's been up to. Here here for being your self, and not being ashamed or afraid to show it. It's how I like life.

Oooh you guys deserve an update. I've been tending to the Megg and child who in another universe would be named fizzgig and it's ok...ehhh good even, sorta.

Meg is at the complainier stage of pregancy that comes after the complainy stage. Well in her defense she's really pregnant now and the weight of her belly is so much strain that theres no comfortable position for her to lie in. If she lays on her back the baby squishes her sciatic nerve, on her sides and the baby tugs at the skin and tendons on her sides. All she has for relief is Harry Potter, which she started at about 3 months into her pregnancy and she's now in the middle of book 5, she's a speed reader..

I don't read the paper copies. I read the audiobooks while I work out in the early mornings. Ok, ok I know some might say that reading has more to do with paper than ipods, but what I say to them is go tell that shit to their freind Barney Rubble cause I'm not listening.

....oooh. I feel asleep before I finished thsi and I don't quite remember what this post was supposed to be about. I'm just glad I posted it.

Hmmm, maybe the end of this can be a recap of the last few days since I stoped typing it.

Hmm.. India gate was nice. Caught up with e:chico. I really like that dude he's generally cheery. His new gf is supa nice too. Ooh, a big shot out to e:jim for setting that up and James for putting up with Mya's craziness. She just about ate his face the entire time we were there.

Otherwise, I think my cat is having an affair with me. She's the only cat I can be near without going to an anaphylactic shock, or coughing until I vomit. Late at night I wake up to her laying on my pillow above my hair, which I think she chews on, or licking my lips, it's kinda hot... She's my favorite cat in the world. I keep trying to get e:paul to meet her since I'm convicned that she's natrually hypo-allergenic but he's not convinced.

I should end this soon, maybe just post a part too tommrow since if this is too long no body will want to read it.

Oooh one last thing. Let e:pmt borrow a copy of 300. I think that e:paul is going to hate it. It's really violent..., but something must be said about it's artistic presentation and the fact that there's 300 buff dudes in diapers. Like this dude, I'll just wait to get his review


Ok peeps. I miss you dudes, but at least we have the journals. Speaking of I have a lot of catch up to do....

OK... I'm lying in bed again.

I think the babys coming way soon. Like in a few days, like maybe 20. She's gonna blow.... holy crap where are we gonna put this friggin' baby! Meg keeps complaining about pains in her public bones and I know that's just tantamount to shooting out a baby!

I'm buying the house as fast as I can. Oh, it's on Sanders Street in north buffalo, it has a wood burning stove in it and a huge master bedroom since it's a bungalo. As soon as we settle in and Meg feels ok letting the baby stay with my mom for a bit we'll have a house warming party. I can't wait to see you people in my own house.

I think babies make girls daft. OK, I'm aware that Meg must like me since she's preggers with my love child, but she's been awfully smoofy lately. She keeps crooning at me. OK, in her defense I did just wash my hair, and you know, you can't wash dreads to often or the hair gets dry and snaps off, but it had been too long. Yeah I was starting to get a lil rank, but I washed my mop, and she's all croony.

Ok, the kitty likes me a lot too. So much that we have to have discussions about what not to stand on while I'm on the computer. She's lying on my arm right now, she's so cute. She sleeps next to me now and Meg thinks she's a whore. I think the cats really just waiting for me to fall a sleep so she can chew on my hair again.

Kitty Reading Estrip... too cute


Get away from Paul's lappy Kitty, he's allergic!


I went on a camping trip on Friday and Saturday, and I have to say that I really really had a good time. I was on vacation, it was only a 2 day vacation, but I needed it. Works not too bad, but it has it's moments, but being a pre baby daddy will make you wanna run away screaming sometimes.

I went to brushwood with e:vycious and crew. e:des was there, and their extended circle of friends, Knife, Scriber, Matthew, H, Emily Randy, and the lot of them. It was for a festival call Dionisia... I know I spelled that wrong, but oh well. Yeah, this place was really awesome, and I loved it. I forgot how pegan-hippie-goth I used to be, back when I was revolting against my Christian up bringing and I was looking around for stuff to satisfy my deep emotional state. I found the pegan community to be quite welcoming. I always thought it was peculiar that African-Americans practiced Christianity after they had a choice to do anything but. I mean they were only Christian because they were slaves and what they practiced religiously scared thier owners. As a newly liberated 19 year old I was trying to put all former ties to slavery behind me, I was free.

My parents never knew all the things I did, or they'd start praying like nutz. Funny thing is while I was in a drum circle, or a Native American sweat lodge I was praying for them, and I felt more self righteous and sincere than I ever could in a church.

I didn't start practicing wicca, but I did start celebrating holidays that weren't on the calendar. I like holidays, everyone's excited, people gather, there's food and games. I did a a lot of drumming in those days and hoped to attract a really cute and smelly girl every once and a while. I forgot how much fun drumming was till I got to Brushwood. Meet some intersteing people. Saw some old chubby ladies and men naked and dancing and free...some young one's too. It felt good to be around people that in touch with who they were and open and free about it. I drummed so hard I still have bruises on my thighs from when I was looking for a snappier sound. I'm really glad I got a chance to reject who I was. I would never have become an understanding person when it comes to others if I was holding on too tightly to what I was. That trip put me back in touch with 19 year old Tony. I didn't realize how much I missed him, and how much he missed everyone else.

I think I'm going to keep drumming. I have a small djembe and I'm going to buy a big one. I don't know what happened to the one I had before. I think a roommate got to it or some such, but that's ok. I'll get a new one. Here's some trees and sky from my trip.



I'm glad I'm posting again....I write to remember.

If anyone wants to do some drumming just say so and I'll be there.

Ok... I listen to nerdy podcasts all the time. Video games, tech news, science. One of which is a podcast called "the naked scientist". I know, weird.

I also have made decent friends with a scientist at Roswell. He researches cancers, obviously, but I bug him with my science questions and tell him about my excitement in current research all the time cause he's more likely to give a hoot... but then what about you lot.

Here's the email I sent him. I'm busting with excitement, I think you should be too.

Subject: More Scientist Stuff

Body:

I swear I'm going to break down and go back to school so I can do this all the time.

Check these two things out.

They've found an chemical HIV vaccine, it was reported on this British Scientific Podcast called "The Naked Scientist". I know weird. Here's a link to the iTunes store for it and a link to the web site. They have enhanced podcasts so if you have iTunes you can scrub the progress bar until it's the title "New HIV Drugs" shows up, it's even easier on your iPod the sections are divided into bars. Relatively early in the show.

But then there's always this sort of thing where just because it's great news for humans now, is it necessarily good news for humans later? I think I emailed you a link to this podcast before. It's a sci-fi story about weather it's good that we destroy diseases since it may stymie evolution link . Think link mitochondria are some of the largest bits of debate weaponry that creationist scientists use against evolutionists (sp? bad terms?), but that's not what this is about. Figuring weather we should stop viruses before we've learned to live symbiotically with them and they improve us is, if that's what they're up to.

....ahhh. Ok, I'll stop bugging you. Really though, if I'm just pestering you let me know. I'd hate to be a nescience. I just get so excited.

Hmm, last question. I have an idea for a study but it has to do with bone density. Do you know a scientist that's in that kind of research?

Dom responded, and his response was awesome check this out!

Very cool science show. They seem like they know what they are talking about from the little bit I listened too. These new HIV drugs aren't really vaccines exactly, but it sounds like they have great potential.

The question of "is it good for humans later" is pointless as far as I am concerned. Nature is a cruel master. Civilizations have developed to help cope with nature. We build shelters to protect us. We build social structures to help us get food and water. We build medical systems to help keep us healthy. We can do these things because we have evolved these capabilities. To not use those abilities would be stymie - ing evolution.

Mitchondria came from a symbiotic relationship between bacteria and eukaryotic single cell organisms. This infection happened before we evolved the ability to fight infections...

Suppose we did not treat HIV. Like the story says, there are some people who have a specific mutation in the CCR5 receptor that won't allow HIV infection. If everyone gets exposed to HIV, only these people and others who have other sorts of protective differences ("mutations") will survive. Now, a couple hundred years later, humanity is more "fit" because evolution ran its course concerning this one thing - HIV infection.

Good in theory, but will not happen exactly BECAUSE of evolution. Bald eagles almost became extinct because of a chemical that came into their environment (it doesn't matter that we were responsible for this point) which made their egg shells more fragile. The eggs could not support the weight of the parents that sit on them. so the eggs would collapse and the parent crushed the young. Eagles are not smart enough to realize that maybe they shouldn't sit on their eggs any longer. They are not able to build nice warm, cozy incubators for their eggs. In fact, if we had not removed the chemical from their environment in the 70's (DDT, I think) they would very likely be extinct right now.

Humans, on the other hand, have evolved such abilities. We are not wild animals and we could not survive for long without the social structures we have put in place. Why should it be OK to deny the use of a drug like this to help against a viral infection, but not OK to no longer allow trucks to deliver food from rural farm areas to cities. How would all those people in NYC eat?

There is another argument: Let's say there are some mutant eagles that build super strong eggs, so they don't crush their young. All the non-mutant eagles die off after a few generations, so now the species has evolved to have only these mutant eagles with super strong eggs are left. The chemical in the environment is not threat to these remaining eagles. Only 2% of the total original eagle population had this mutation. Luckily, the eagle population was large enough and varied enough for this mutation to be a possibility. But now, the genetic fitness of eagles is dramatically less. The population has lost 98% of its variation. What happens if another challenge comes along that these eagles can't handle? The genetic variation for many, many generations of these eagles will be so small that is it highly unlikely they would be able to survive another challenge like, let's say, an avian HIV. Maybe all of the eagles that had a mutation in CCR5 that could have saved them from avian HIV. Unfortunately, none of them had the super strong egg mutation so they all crushed their young and died off.

The exact same concepts would be applied to the human HIV story. If we let it run its course, and part of the population survived and that population is now somehow better able to withstand viral attacks because of this evolution, the genetic fitness of humanity would be much worse off.

So, my point is that evolution gave us the ability to protect ourselves and to not use those abilities is to ignore evolution. You could extend my theory to the n'th degree and say that eventually, nothing will be able to kill us. Where do you draw the line between benefiting from the abilities you have evolved, and actually interfering so much with evolution that you destroy the concept altogether? In a way, this is already happening. There are people with genetic mutations that would normally kill them before they were old enough to breed. Medical interventions now allow them to live long enough to breed. They do. Now there are more people with these mutations that would have been winnowed out without medical intervention.

I am not sure I have the answer for "where do you draw the line?". I've given this very little thought, but I think you draw the line at changing the genetic material of the gametes (sperm and egg). I think this would be wrong. But maybe it is not so simple as that. If you could take two people with cystic fibrosis, and fix the single mutation that causes the disease, I would say we should do that. These people could live normal lives with normal lung function. The gene would only need to be fixed in specific cells in the airways. In fact, some of the very 1st gene therapy experiments were to do exactly this. But what about when those two people get married and decide they want kids? Should we fix the bad gene in their sperm and eggs so that their kids come out normal?? I don't think so, because now you have pushed the line....how far do you push it? People with sickle cell anemia, which could theoretically be fixed in such a way, are resistant to malaria. What if cystic fibrosis people have some benefit we don't recognize yet?

Anyway.....I have to get back to work.

No, I don't know anyone studying bone density.

Ok, so paul asked me to comment on why we've...ok I've abandoned ASP and well it got really long in the tooth. I figured I'd just post a blog and link it so I could come correct my typos later. If you want to comment to this post just go back to e:paul,40711, yeah... here' um my Response:

ASP classic (not .NET) is not a complete web language. There are things that PHP address and can handle that you need to code in a "different" (Visual Studio 6 at least, which is very similar but not the same at all) language to do in ASP classic. To boot you at times need to create server objects and install them which makes your code only work on that (friggin' expensive) box and and which just ruins your flow.

Ok, don't get me wrong, I'm not an ASP hater. I have much love for the language it's cute and quaint and how I started to learn progarmming, but I'm gonna throw some more darts atit right now.

ASP is kinda dying. A language is only as usefully as it's ablity to solve problems for you, and if you don't know how to accomplish those goals off hand you have to find the documentation to help you. Yeah, It's horribly documented. If you ever need to find anything about it that's not in an outdated overpriced bargain bin book that's likely out of print the best places tend to be fringe web sites that are dying one by one. The best of which 4GuysFromRolla have been slowly sliding off of the Classic bandwagon and into .NET land, so soon the language will be completely dead.

The language is horiffically dated. It came about well after OOP was invented but somehow didn't see the merit of becomgin fully OOP. It has some OOP qualities, but ASP is really not an OOL. You can instantiate classes, and it's a lot easier to organize your code this way but the language is not designed for it, nor is there any IDE that will let you take full advantage of it (even so much as Zend does PHP). As a result you end up spending more code on small tasks which in part ruins the fact that the feature is even there.

Really, PHP is isn't even as good, as ASP is bad. I'm not flaming ASP classic, it has it's uses, but it also has it's limitations are there are far too many, namely that's not as well suited for the web than languages that have come after it and that were competing during it's height. I don't think that you need to go to PHP to move ahead with web development, but certainly can't stick with ASP or even ASP.NET. If you check out the history of the language you'll see that it has always been a last ditch effort by MS that was never fully realized. I think they (MS) bought it off of an 3rd party to compete with SUN or someone when they come out with a web language that could be run on servers other than Windows, and was never fleshed out until .NET which is still not a very good web language.

The earliest versions of ASP.NET are completely different animals than the later, which leaves you with quite a bit of abandon work that you had to pay $500 to develop at each stage. because this language is the first attempt by MS to put a full fledged product for the web into the wild.

Their primary goal was to promote their flagship platform, the Windows desktop, for a very long time. Coming around to web centric thinking was hard for a company the girth of MS, what's worse is they didn't want to abandon thier years loyal customer base or force the army of developers who were making their companies by a suite of windows products from servers to desktop applications, etc and so on. So what did they do? What does ASP.NET smack of no matter what language you program it in? (You can use c#, j#, or ASP for the .NET web platform) Desktop computing. They tried to allow desktop programmers to use their current skill set to program the web, which is stupid. I like to compare desktop and web programming like I compare American and International Football. Both are sports, you need to be athletic for both, but players from either sport would do poorly in the other. No amount of equipment /.NET will help you play well enough. You just need to retrain and

All of the "features" of that platform are if you pay much attention to it (and, ok most of this is opinion, but look at it your self and tell me what you think) capture to desktop programmers. Most .NET coders don't ever get to see HTML or JavaScript (weird right?). They didn't even get AJAX in their platform until it was past fad, which is absolutely crazy since MS was the company to first include the XMLHTTPRequest object (or what ever its' officially called). I've watched other developers senior to me who've tried to stick with MS get lost in the quagmire of what it'd like to present to the world a cutting edge web tech.

The web and the desktop and 2 different animals. MS is learning that the hard way, don't get left behind with them.