This may be a little TMI...



Then again you're still reading. I just realized that I went the entire month of Febuary without having any. It's not like I didn't have the opportunity it is just I was like "Ah, I'm going to stay home and study" type of thing. This is pretty scary. It's not normal or right. I'm only young once and I'm just wasting it being a "Blah" bump on the log. How am I gong to be when I'm really older? Will I even bother?

Maybe it's just that I won't want to be "married" at the moment in a realtionship but then again what I'm totally lacking and I admit it is the even basic iota of effort on my part. I've always seemed to fall on the side of introvert on the spectrum but lately this has just been ridiculous. I could just blame the weather and the avoidance of the bad driving conditions but again this is just not right. I need to do something.

It could be that my schedule @ work is going to get messed around and I may have to go in on some weekend hours. Yea, take my downtime on weekends for granted when you have them and agonize in pain when they're goine. Not a good philisophy in life I can say...

At this point I'm just worried about my lack of "drive." I hope it's not a sign of something else, i.e. depression. What to do? Go to Canada and Lundy's Lane and jump start some physical desire?


Because I'm not saying in this post that I need to get some. What I'm saying is I need to get the WANT to get some...for some reason for the past month I've been toally uninterested and that need to change soon.