Or the Duke of Caimbridge if you prefer. Anyhoo another wierd dream last night. The Prince and I were at the top of a ski slope, but in summertime, so it was covered in grass. There was a massive orange tarp slide going down it in zig zaggy directions, kind of like an ultra mega platinum huge slip n' slide.

We had to go down it on our bellies, but half on top of each other like a luge. Along the way we have to try to rescue Muppets which are dangling on ropes throughout the course. Occassionally there are these giant playing cards (about the size of a car) ramped at angles that we had to jump to avoid pits of purple acid.

Get to the bottom with all these rescued Muppets and guess what? They turn EVIL and start attacking us! WTF.

I had a dream last night that the Green Lantern was teaching me how to shoot bow and arrow. My target was a carved out watermelon pegged to a telephone post with little melon balls in it. I was supposed to hit a melon ball from lightyears away, on my knees. But hey, at least I got to spend time with Ryan Reynolds....he's quite easy on the eyes!

I had the most amazing dream last night, I wish I could have it again and again!

In my dream we had already mastered trips to space for common folk. Naturally, (e:theecarey) and myself were on board one of these flights. We were taking a 'cruise ship' to the 'Asteroid Islands'. Yeah, clever.

The ship looked just like a space shuttle, except is was about 20 times bigger, maybe more. It launched vertically with some type of blue flame that burned entirely clean. Humankind had created a way to eliminate g-force on the internal compartments of the ship, so passengers felt nothing at all. In fact, Carey and I were involved in a game of Wizard Chess before we realized we had taken off.

There were only a few observation decks but they were closed for the journey to the first island. A creepy robotic voice announced our arrival; the sweet British accent makes me nervous. I momentarily wonder if she'll try to kill us all in some act of AI rebellion. Then the observation deck windows opened. Slowly, very slowly, the dark gray walls lowered and I caught my first glimpse of bright blue as Earth came into view. Then, browns and greens....and I screamed with excitement, "Carey come look, that's AAAFFFRIICAAA"! The massive continent came into full view as the grinding metal came to a halt. It was so real. So real. I was standing on board a ship looking at Africa from 20,000 miles away. A shroud of tranquility fell over everyone in that room. I could hear my own heart beating.

We were interrupted by the voice announcing not our doom, but our freedom to access the first island - which looked remarkably like one out of Mario Galaxy. Imagine a jagged lump of gray rock floating in space with a perfect layer of bright fluffy green grass on the top side. This island of course doesn't rotate, it remains idle save for it's orbit around Earth.

We descended to the surface via ladder. Humankind had also figured out a way to create force fields allowing for prime environmental conditions. It was perfect. No air tanks, no eye wear, just a sexy white jumpsuit was all that separated my skin from the vast universe.

I popped into the grocery store tonight and saw these cookies. They made me laugh. I find humor in the most simple things I guess.



On to my dream....

I was on a business trip of some kind with (e:imk2) and some other girl I don't know. We were in Italy. When we arrived at our 'hotel' we realized our rooms were actually tents pitched on the beach. I thought it was cool, the other two didn't agree.

We dropped off our things, freshened up, and decided to head out for dinner. On the way we stopped into the hotel gift shop; a large hut on the beach. However instead of the usual, the place was full of college graduation gear. Gowns, hats, medallions, diplomas, cords, you name it. (e:imk2) bought the type of gown traditionally worn when you earn a doctorate. I jokingly asked her if she was going back to school and preparing early. She said she was.

We climbed a fire escape ladder to the roof top of a nearby building. The roofing looked like traditional red tiles used in Italy, only they were actually made of dark chocolate. Maybe Willi Wonka owned that house?

Anyway, (e:imk2) asked me to guess what she was going to study. I had no idea really, so I said Anthropology. She jumped up in excitement and said, "No! Paranormal Science!". Then my darn alarm went off. Seriously weird dream.

In my dream, I lived in a city. I was walking down a sidewalk to my older sister's house. I was only wearing a short, light blue, terrycloth towel. Once I entered the exterior street door I was in a massive foyer. It had a rich and ornate church like interior. A double wide oak staircase was blocked by a thick oak railing. I used the small gate, climbed the steps, and entered the house through the stained glass door.

My sister was hanging out in her bath robe making some tea. My nephew was sleeping in his crib. We were just going to sit down for some cookies when the door bell rang. Still wearing my towel dress, I went out to the foyer. There were two (e:peeps) greeting me. It didn't make any sense to me why they would be there, or how they even knew that I was there. I invite them in anyway. One of them decided he was better off jumping the railing rather than using the gate. His foot got caught resulting in the rapid propulsion of his body over the railing thus planting his face firmly on the ground.

It was actually quite messy. He popped up with his busted self, blood running down his green shirt and jeans, and says, "Change of plans I'll fuck you later when I get out of the hospital". He and the other peep leave. I head back in to my sister's house.

Apparently my sister was very wealthy and had a larger number of staff at her disposal. For fun she made them partake in 'games' that I saw as a cross between reality tv bake offs and that crazy hysterical Japanese show MXC.

Next thing I know there is a giant Jelly Belly bean cook off. Five chefs had to make a jelly bean the size of a small child. I think they weighed around 50 pounds. They had to put their jelly bean in their apron and attempt to stay on their feet while going down a wide plastic slide covered in flour. Seriously! Needless to say they all wiped out. However it doesn't end there!

The bottom of the slide is in a basement maze. Here the chefs have to run around in near darkness collecting 3 artifacts and then finding the single spiral staircase to victory.

When I become aware of the dream, I am sitting at a desk in some large mansion. Maybe it was more like a castle. It was veeeeeery big, stone, lots of dark ornate woods with intricate carvings on them. Spooky looking demon children charubs here and there, carpet the colour of blood. Perhaps it was Vlad Tepes' old digs.

Anyway, Im sitting at a desk writing out a note. My friend stands by my side. A butler entered the room with a small package, placed it on the desk, bowed, and exited the room. It was a small package about the size of a shoe box, wrapped in funny type of light brown wrapping. Suddenly the box began emitting a strange sound that shouldn't have been audible to the human ear.

Oh Shit Batman, someone set us up the bomb!

I grabbed her arm and starting running through a door to the next room. BOOOOOOM! That shit blew! She fell gracefully onto a bed while I face planted a wall. Then I heard it again. Someone had set a trail of these bombs all over this castlemansion. I don't know if she was the target or myself, but then my duty phone rang for another fire alarm and I woke up.

I wonder who was trying to kill me this time?

I woke up sweaty and full of anxiety. I had tears in my eyes. I had a bad dream. Not like the nightmares I had recently, but it was bad. It was chock full of betrayal by people I love. Holy chipmunks on crack Batman, it was that awful! It opened a well of emotions I hoped would remain closed. Why?

I had coffee with (e:Joshua) recently and somehow our topic of conversation turned to relationships. Issues of trust, betrayal, abandonment, cheating, lying, fighting, living together...you name it, it was discussed. I brought up stories of people I hadn't thought about in yeeeeeeears.

The things I wish I had the confidence to say back then. I was only 22, what did I know? He cheated on me, only I caught him with the latest flavor. There were 4 more previous to her. What was the point of being in a relationship for 3 years if you really just wanted to NOT be in one?

What I expressed to Josh was the reasoning that if you live in constant fear that your significant other is unfaithful, you have nothing. I never thought about those things because I had to base our relationship on trust and friendship; I was in it 110%.

Paul! I really do hope your marriage is working out and that she is the 'something better' that came along.

Paul and I were also together for 3 years. We were a great team. We never argued but were able to disagree peacefully. One day, out of nowhere, I get "I'm just a guy in my 20's - what if something better comes along?" But, there was already someone new, not 'what if'. Ouch.

I really struggled with this one. On one hand I was completely and utterly humiliated because he basically told me I was just a pleasantry on his journey to true happiness. On the other, although really shitty, he was honest. As it turned out he pursued his new fancy to no avail. 6 months later he came back with, "I made a mistake".

This was incredibly difficult to hear. However, I had come to accept our separation without tears. It was just too little too late. Almost every girl I know would have taken him back. They would take him back because they would feel triumphant. It's easy to go back to what you know, where you felt safe, where you once felt loved. I couldn't take him back because I realized however lame the reason sounded to me, it was reason enough. It ended because it was time for it to end. I was 26.

Now that you've read about my two longest relationships, let us get back to the well of emotions unearthed in my sleep last night. I dreamed that everyone I knew, all of my friends, the distant ones as well as the close ones, betrayed me in some form or another. I felt so isolated, so alone. I had no one to talk to.

Have you seen that commercial where a man is sitting at his kitchen table with Abe Lincoln and a beaver playing poker? His dreams tell him how much they miss him?

My dreams let me know they have been missing me. I was missing them too. I realized it had been soooooo long since I had dreams. Really. I wake up so much in my sleep that I hardly get to enter REM cycle, which is incredibly disturbing.

I am happy to report that with the new meds I've been taking I have finally been able to sleep for a few hours continuously!!! As a result I have my dreams back!!!!

1. (e:Joshua) was getting married to this uber bridezilla biotch! I have no idea who she was but she was a misserable goober! The entire atmosphere was dark. It was dark outside, everyone was dressed in black, they were riding in a herse! (sp?) All the trees were dead, it was windy, and they got married on the porch of this half burned down black house. Creeeeeepy!

2. This one was disturbing. I was chillin with (e:Leetee) in some strange little antique shoppe. I went upstairs to use the toilets and saw (e:Nejifer) and (e:Uncutsaniflush) having an affair in a fur coat closet! Then the place was flooded with pugs! They were everywhere!

I had a dream last night...I was wearing my Super Girl thong underwear and a tank top while sporting my super fly adidas sneakers. Apparently I didn't own a single pair of pants. I was just walking around through my day all la-di-da like. In my opinion, it was a bit drafty, but I probably flipped the covers off me during the night, and the above description is what I wore to bed. Whatever, it was just weird to be walking around in the Pink wearing it. Yes, all the epeeps were there!

I dreamed I was being chased, as usual, and I had to protect this small group of people, as usual. This is where my sense of part-time superheroinism comes from. Anyhow... you'll love my recipe for salvation. I swiftly escort them all into this big green bathroom that looks like the scene from a condemned sanitarium; complete with grandmother tub and electric shock equipment. Guess what the secret escape route is. Fill the tub with macaroni and cheese. Then we'll jump down the drain pipe. Yah. Maybe it's because I ate macaroni and cheese last night out of a Frisbee. Hey, I'm too busy working on finals to wash my clothes or dishes so I get creative. Why do I even have a Frisbee?



Then, to keep the theme of not sleeping while I sleep, I dreamt of finals again. It was horrifying. I was studying and my classmates were asking me what I thought about the theory of so and so. I didn't have a clue what they were talking about. It was as if I had taken the course and studied for some other course entirely. But it wasn't even real. The theories they were speaking of were entirely fictitious. Or maybe I've just seen the future and there will be the theory of so and so in Student Affairs one day. Blah. I just wish I could sleep peacefully for one night. Ciao.