04/28/07 01:00 - ID#39072

what are "friends"?

So, a series of (really, really shitty) events has brought me to some important realizations.

I have just realized that some of my "friends" are not my friends, but my drinking buddies.

I mean less to them than a bottle of wine.

I can not, and should not, count on them for anything. They will not be there for me when I need someone, and they will not change their plans for me.

Not that they don't enjoy my company- they do. We have a great time together. I really enjoy hanging out with them; it's always a blast. And I do believe they really do like having me around.

But why? what am I to them?

A chick, first of all. A chick that will hang out with them and drink and let them act like pigs. I get points for that.

I am someone to grope when drunk that will not kick them in the balls. (but I'm ok with that, b/c I'll grope back most of the time.)

And I might be some sort of weird status symbol- in that they get to introduce me to their friends as "our friend, THE SURGEON". It's like they're really proud of me. It's almost cute. Which is fine, except that it usually leads to the assumption that I will foot the bill for the rest of the night. Ironic, since I make less than all of them.

So, this realization is kind of depressing- but maybe liberating at the same time.

Now that I have a better grasp of the situation, maybe I can adjust my expectations accordingly, and stop being disappointed all the time.

Hmm.

-J

p.s. T-2 days!!!!!! (though due to some crap at work, this is suddenly about the worst time I could possibly be out of town, and will lead to me getting fucked.)

p.p.s.
Next saturday is:
1: a saturday
2: cinco de mayo
3: my first night back in town
4: my last night of vacation
5: my birthday

Everyone should come out!! I don't know when or where, since I don't even land til 10:30. But somewhere, fo sho!

later peaches.

metalpeter writes at 06:54:58 04/28/07 - Comment #17951: First of all I hope you have a great time on your cruise. Hope you have lots of fun but not so much you go to jail. I hope you take lots of pictures and let us (e:peeps) see them.

Secondly If I would have known you let your friends grop you I would have asked for your number the first time I met ya (kinding well sord of I guess). But the point I'm getting at is there are all kinds of different friends. For example you may have friends at work but that is the only place you are friends. Bar friends like in that piano man song where everyone is there and lonely but where it still beats drinking alone. There are school friends. This is the point that is used in some beer Add I think for labatts. And it is very true that the type of friend is defined by how you know them and what type of relationship you have with them.

I didn't know that Cinco de mayo was your birthday, hope you wind up having fun. I myself will be downtown at a comedy event at the town ballroom.
If there is a predetremined celebration for your birthday I might be able to make it.

theecarey writes at 03:20:15 04/28/07 - Comment #17938: ah yes. friends can fall into various categories. Some are party friends, some are gossip friends, some are cry on should friends, some are 'bail you out' friends, some are 'get in trouble with you' friends.. and a very small select few can be all those and more. Just dont expect more out of any of them than what they are able and willing to give & visa versa.
The sucky part is realizing this. Although the best part-- and you already said it--its liberating to know who's who and what you can expct/depend on people for.

totally in need for no strings attached, drunken laugh fest?-- thems your boys. Dont turn to your serious-logical- all work-no play pals to help loosen up after a mad week of work/study. You know what I mean :)

ps.. where are you going? What did I miss? Wherever it is.. relax, have oodles of fun, keep text books at home!

lilho writes at 01:44:53 04/28/07 - Comment #17937: hey peach! what can i say? some people are just shitty, and that said, you should move on and find better friends! i will def be up for going out next sat, cinco de mayo and your bday? sounds like a good time to me. and here's the best part... i don't give a shit that you are a surgeon, i won't grope you, unless you really want me to, and i will find you amusing w/or w/o alcohol!

ladycroft writes at 01:40:48 04/28/07 - Comment #17936: um, since when is getting fucked a bad thing? ooooooh, that kind of fucked...nevermind. that sucks.

mrmike writes at 01:27:00 04/28/07 - Comment #17934: For what it's worth, I'm sorry about the "gang." That does suck. I'm only older (not wiser) so I don't have anything profound beyond I hope you're not getting taken for granted (Sounds like it might be a little too late for that).

On the flip side, enjoy the vaca -- you've earned some awesomeness. Hope it's flawless.